Televisual Acuity

TV Review: Smash

2012-01-23T11:53:00.018-07:00

In short, I'm in love.

I watched the pilot for Smash (free on iTunes), NBC's latest attempt at dragging the network out of the gutter, and I have to admit, it's also their greatest attempt. While past Hail Mary passes have died ignominious deaths at the hands of the network that was, Smash is far and away their best effort and has the best chance of subverting my expectations for the network.

I should start off with a full disclosure of biases. The premise for this show is pretty much tailor-made for me and my artistic sensibilities. I'm a sucker for serialized dramas, musicals, dance, Broadway, and Jack Davenport. Honestly, it could have been half as good and I'd still be giddy with anticipation for more and clutching my pearls that NBC will blow it. Again. Unhealthy love of musicals aside, I've never been a fan of Marilyn Monroe or her brainless cupie doll routine, at all, so in my own particular brand of flamboyant mathematics, I think my biases may have cancelled each other out. As such, prepare yourselves for a completely unprejudiced and unconflicted review. Huzahh!

A lot of television viewers and critics have been quick with the snap judgments about Smash, assuming it was NBC's attempt at a Glee-style hit, but rest assured, rather than a derivative knock-off of a show that has spun into a full disaster, Smash is everything Glee wishes it could be, but isn't. Rather than setting up a faulty framework whereby actors can sing a million song covers that are vaguely adjacent to whatever contrived moment it happening on air, Smash embraces the ages-old theatrical conceit of a show within a show and makes it sparkle. Yeah, yeah, they're both shows with songs and... no, actually, that's about where the comparisons stop. Watching Smash didn't at all feel like watching some iteration of Glee, and if you've watched Glee over the past two seasons, you know there's no possible way that isn't a compliment.

Smash tells the story of the making of a musical about the life of Marilyn Monroe, using the songs within the musical that is being writing as the primary songs for the show. It forges a compelling blend between the real world and the stage adaptation in much the way the film adaptation of Chicago did (I kinda want to say that Rob Marshall is involved with this show somehow, but don't quote me on that), shifting from reality to fantasy from breath to breath. Other songs elucidate character moments and plot developments as well, but it all blends together nicely and doesn't feel like, "Awh hell, it's been 7 minutes, we have to put another song in no matter how much it doesn't fit." The musical numbers were all completely organic to the story and felt like, well... like I was watching a good musical. For those of you out there who've seen good ones and bad ones, you know what I mean. In the best musicals, the songs simply flow through the narrative like all other storytelling elements. In a bad musical, well, you can feel the number coming from a mile away and can't believe you have to sit through an entire song about postage stamps. It helps that Smash has a hell of a pedigree going into it, not only with an amazing cast of onscreen talent, but actual Broadway writers and choreographers working behind the scenes. These people know how to put on a show and I know how to sit on the edge of my seat clapping my hands together and grinning.

Katharine McPhee stars as Karen Cartwright, budding ingenue and corn-fed Iowan who dreams of making it on Broadway. With her primary credit being "former American Idol contestant," I was understandably concerned about her ability to carry a series. Her acting resume is pretty slim, but at the end of the day, she did a really lovely job, allowing her inexperience to make her performance better, not worse. McPhee is green and unpolished, but so is the character she plays. The very quality that makes her an appealing and refreshing choice as Marilyn makes her an appealing actress overall. Every slightly awkward moment comes off as genuine and disarming. I wouldn't say that every second was a home run, but I found that I connected with her character instantly and found myself rooting for her from the get-go.

By intentional contrast, Karen's rival in the race for the lead is a Broadway veteran named Ivy, and is played by Megan Hilty. Maybe it's humanity's knee-jerk sympathy for the underdog, but neither I, nor the producers of the show within the show were as drawn to her as they are to Karen. She actually did a very nice job embodying Marilyn and she's a force to be reckoned with onstage, but there was something forced and almost disingenuous about her portrayal. Whether this is chalked up to the actress, the character design, or both, is anyone's guess, but it made for a noteworthy juxtaposition. I assume she'll grow on my over time, but as is, one of my very few quibbles with the show was that McPhee's character is so obviously the star of the show (although after talking to Annie, it seems some people were more divided than I). Maybe it's just me, but I can't imagine any universe in which she doesn't get the lead role. It appears that the bulk of the first season will focus on the contest for the role of Marilyn, so unless they flesh out Ivy in more substantial ways, I think the winner is a bit of a foregone conclusion. I think the reason I struggled with Ivy is that she went whole-hog with the Betty Boop Marilyn persona that I've long despised. McPhee's character gave Marilyn an actual personality, a heart, a brain, (da noive?) and my attention. She made her more than the dingbat, and that instantly wins her a lot of points.

The two leads do a very nice job, but it's the rest of the cast that really brings it together and creates the world of the show. The cast is replete with heavy-hitters like Angelica Huston, Debra Messing, and of course, my darling Jack Davenport who steals the show. Okay, I may be a bit biased, as mentioned above, but I think most viewers will find his prickly, sexy, brilliant director Derek Wills as delightful as I do. There are truly no serious weak links in the cast at all and I found myself believing the characters instantly and investing in them. To see the contrast between the two young women, pursuing their dreams in the face of parental opposition or apathy and the profession veterans who've seen a million girls just like them feels authentic and meaningful. We theatre buffs have seen this conceit before, to be sure, but there's a reason writers keep tapping that well. It's utterly compelling and unbearably brutal to watch. I've seen it a dozen times and yet I get sucked in every single time.

Indeed, the few weaker points to the pilot were some of the more staid story elements. While the performances made some of the more predictable plot points work, they were predictable nonetheless. As the season progresses, I'm hopeful the writers will play with expectations and take more narrative chances, but even if they don't, it all still works. More surprises would simply be icing on the cake. In terms of the smaller story elements, there were a few moments where the writers were clearly aiming for heart and depth, but slid into schmaltz instead. I'm not overly concerned here. Once the show really finds its feet, I'm confident these more heavy-handed beats will dissipate as the characters become fully formed. I realize that Ellis' monologue about his love of the theatre and Ivy's would-be heartbreaking phonecall to her apathetic mother were important character points, but this early on, they fell a bit flat. Those were the two primary instances in the pilot that didn't ring true for me and felt forced. The fact that these two moments came from the two characters I connected to the least is no coincidence, methinks.

Minor quibbles aside, the show really worked. The chemistry between all the actors made even the weaker beats worth ignoring. In particular, McPhee and Davenport sizzle onscreen. This is, of course, intentional, and it's a good thing it worked because the show would be far less without it. The story of an aspiring starlet facing the prospect of having to sleep with the director to get the gig is well-worn and familiar, but again, the actors make it feel fresh. Jack Davenport can do no wrong, really. His real strong-suit is the subtlety he brings to the story in the smaller moments. The look on his face and glint in his eye when McPhee performs for the first time had me sold on him as a character and on her as the lead. How that will all shake out in the long run, especially in light of the entirely too revelatory "this season on Smash" highlight reel, will be interesting to watch, even if not completely surprising. That said, the fact that Tom, one of the writers of the musical, and Derek, the director, hate each other (or at least feel a certain rivalry) will make the whole process twistier and murkier in all the best ways. Does Tom want Ivy for the lead because he thinks she's best for the part or because it's clear that Derek favors Karen? Will his loyalties to Ivy win out? Will Derek's bravado overpower him? When push comes to shove, who carries more weight in the decision? I kinda can't wait to find out.

All in all, this was an easy show for me to enjoy. My threshold for musicals is pretty low in general, but even if I weren't such a fan of the genre, I think there would be a lot to love about Smash. Was it perfect? No. Did I care that it wasn't perfect? No. The glitzy production numbers (I've watched the baseball number about half a dozen times now), Broadway caliber singing and dancing (was that Alex Wong I spied in the rehearsal for said baseball number? why yes, I think it was), fine acting, and wonderful cast were enough for me to casually ignore the flaws. Most musicals have issues, let's be honest, but if I can walk away with a smile on my face and a song stuck in my head, I really can't complain. In the end, I find that I'm more excited about this show than I have been about any other pilot this year. Whether or not it'll sink or swim is anyone's guess, but in terms of network TV in general, NBC might just sink or swim right along with it.

No pressure or anything.

The fact that it's on NBC is actually quite the double-edged sword in terms of it's prospects. On the one hand, NBC has hardly a feather in its cap these days and hasn't launched a huge hit since The Office. When there aren't any solid lead-ins to help with new start-ups, it's much more difficult to find traction with viewers. On the other hand, NBC's standards for "good ratings" have gotten so low that shows have to be complete, total, and utter flops to get cancelled. What this means for Smash is yet to be seen, but the good news is that I think it will do at least well enough that NBC will keep it around for a while. They can't really afford for it to flop... In my heart of hearts though, I think it will do well, NBC notwithstanding.

Pilot Grade: A-

TV Review: Alcatraz

2012-01-17T16:49:00.001-07:00

When the fall slate of shows was announced, I was pretty underwhelmed, finding a lot more to salivate over for midseason than for September. That's still mostly true, what with Revenge being the only real new love of my life, but in fall's defense, midseason is losing a bit of its luster as well.

When I first heard that JJ Abrams had a new show about prisoners disappearing from Alcatraz prison in 1963 then resurfacing 50 years later to cause mayhem and whatnot, I was pretty excited. JJ has a pretty good track record (Undercovers notwithstanding) and although Lost eventually devolved into a total mess, that was long after JJ's involvement had ended. It was with this pedigree that I happily looked forward to Alcatraz as, I hoped, my new obsession, bringing a glisten and cache to midseason that we'd never seen before.

Yeah, not so much.

Awh, best laid plans. Yeah, I think with Alcatraz we have a tragic case of a great, high concept idea that's been weighted down by network TV. What could have been a gripping serial drama full of mystery and intrigue has been revised and diluted into a standard network crime procedural. Ugh. It wasn't a total disaster or anything, and I really do think it has potential, but at the end of the day, it appears to be way more baddie-of-the-week than I expected. In my book, I'll take a decent serial over a good procedural any day of the week, so such a realization was quite a letdown.

The basic gist of the show is interesting and different. When Alcatraz prison closed in 1963, the prisoners were supposedly transferred to other prisons. In the show's mythology, however, they were taken by unknown forces for unknown reasons. In present day San Francisco, these long-forgotten prisoners are resurfacing, having hardly aged a day, with vengeance on their minds and mysterious puppet master pulling the strings. Interesting, right?! Wow, that sounds like a hell of a concept for show! That's something I've never really seen before! I can hardly wait for the awesome web of awesomeness to unfold before me!!

In actuality, the base mythos for the show's conceit acted merely as a framework for a quirky buddy cop crime procedural. Yeah, that's the exact opposite of what I was hoping for. That said, even that could have really come together in fabulous ways. It didn't. Problemo numero uno? Sarah Jones. Good lord, you've got to be kidding me. When I first heard she'd been cast as the female lead, my expectations for the show diminished by half. Quite rightly, I was disappointed to find. Sometimes I really hate being right. Jones plays Rebecca Madsen, a tough, no-nonsense detective who rose through the ranks at a young age, having learned everything she knows about detectiving from her father. Okay, seriously? How many times do I have to see this character? Your show is about ghosts from Alcatraz wreaking havoc and yet you couldn't come up with something more original than that for your primary character? Such laziness does not bode well for the show as a whole. But, again, even such a hackneyed character model can work when placed in the right hands. Sarah Jones' hands ain't them.

In truth, I've only ever seen her on a few episodes of Sons of Anarchy and an episode of Justified. I wasn't particularly impressed by either, but all in all, she did a serviceable job with the roles she was given (that of the daughter of a white supremacist and very pregnant Kentucky prisoner, respectively). While she managed okay with those, at no time did I think to myself, "You know, she's make a hell of a supernatural detective." I was hoping I'd be wrong, but no. She was terrible. Not for one second did I believe she was a police officer of any stripe, let alone a badass detective who chases down bad guys. First of all, she's not old enough to be a detective. But, then again, no one on these shows ever is. The real problem is that she looks about 14. The flippy blond bob and matronly shape did not help. To boot, her manner, her demeanor, the way she carried herself, everything, struck me more as any random woman at a grocery store than as a ballbusting maverick. With a capable actress, her appearance wouldn't have mattered, but Jones couldn't sell the part even if she looked it, so to not look the either was the death knell. She commanded no authority and at no time did I feel she was actually capable of much of anything. She truly brought nothing to the table and left the audience with a bland, forgettable performance. Seriously, if I had to think of 5 words to describe who she is a as a person, I doubt I could get to 3 before giving up and saying things like, "Uh... punctual? And, um... loves Eggos?" for personality traits 4 and 5. A great actor can make even the weakest of material sing. Alcatraz has problems, but it's by no means the "weakest of material," and yet she still failed. The first outing for the show consisted of the pilot and second episode, of which she was front and center and yet I'm still left with nothing but cliches to hold onto. Maybe that's why they stuck to the cliches... they realized she couldn't bring anything special, so they just put a cookie-cutter out there and hoped the audience would fill in all the blanks. Man, I think back to the Veronica Mars pilot. With Kristen Bell as the lead, I left the pilot knowing who she was, how she operated, and most importantly, that I liked her and wanted to know more. Sarah Jones is not half so capable, and Alcatraz suffered as a result. Honestly, with another actress at the helm, I'd probably being singing the show's praises. As is, I'm left wondering what idiot thought she could anchor a show.

Jones was the real problem here, but honestly, the rest of the cast wasn't given much to work with. Hurley is playing Hurley. Straight up. Even his quips and turns of phrase are the same. His manner, tone, reactions, everything. Don't get me wrong, I love Hurley, but I already know Hurley. He's as warm and convivial as ever, having a lovable chemistry with just about everyone. Having never seen him in anything besides Lost, I can't vouch for his range, but I would have loved to have seen him given something a little different. In this, I'm met with a female cop stereotype and a character I already know. On the one hand, it grounded the show in familiarity, but on the other hand, it grounded the show in familiarity. I'm always looking for something new, and when I run across a ballsy high-concept, I expect it to follow through in all aspects, not just the background conceit.

Sam Neill and Parminder Nagra round out the supporting cast and are both fine, but I kept feeling like they were being wasted in favor of watching Jones awkwardly run after criminals. I'm hopeful the writers will realize what they've got on their hands and shift the focus, but as is, they provided the mysterious people behind the curtain, the bosses, the ones in the know, but didn't get to show much of it. Here's hoping for more. The end of the second episode opened a lot of possibilities for Nagra and I'm hoping they make the most of them. That she, apparently, hasn't aged either, existing in flashbacks and modern day, is genuinely intriguing and automatically makes her character far more interesting than the actual leads of the show. It also helps explain how she could have been shot straight through the heart with a huge rifle and managed to survive. I just hope they actually have a plan for the long term and figured out their own mythology before jumping int with both feet. As with Lost before it, I'd hate to see "the island is magical" become a common refrain for this show... (I just barely finished Lost and can I tell ya? Majorly disappointing. That whole last season was a snooze. I had three eps to go and I simply didn't care. Finally watched said eps, and still didn't care. Ugh.)

While the show definitely has some procedural elements to it, what with a ghost from the past seemingly being tracked down week-to-week and pairing between a cop and an unconventional partner, but its ongoing story seems to hold together better than most. I expected the prisoner in the first episode to be a one-off, but it appears that they'll be making appearances for the long run. This gives me hope for the series. With the leads being as lackluster as they are, I found myself instantly more interested in the prisoners, wanting to learn more about their stories, their histories, and their personalities than in Jones or Hurley. For the one-off characters to outshine the stars is a very bad sign, but the underpinnings of the show allow for a more serial arc than expected. I really hope the writers make the most of that and eschew standard procedural elements for something much deeper than they've given us so far. The mysteries they've laid out are genuinely compelling, but having been burnt so many times before, and by several of the same people, I'm reluctant to trust the writers to payoff their setups. Seriously, is it worth feverishly discussing the many possibilities if you can't be sure the writers themselves have figured anything out? Ultimately, probably not. Lost raised so many questions and opted to answer them poorly or not at all that viewers felt cheated. If you're ever looking for a good time, play the "Wait, how did that happen? Uh, the island..." drinking game. You'll be soused in no time. I'm more than a little concerned that this will be the same situation, slightly different island.

The show isn't without hope, but I'm proceeding with extreme caution and prejudice. I doubt I'll ever learn to love the bad acting and personality-lessness of the lead actress, but I'd like to think there's enough here that they could make it work. There are a lot of logistical elements of the story that I think will prove problematic for the writers down the road, but I'm crossing my fingers that they have a plan this time (having seen what a disaster not having a plan proved to be with Lost). At the end of the day, I didn't hate it, but I certainly didn't love it either. My brother and I spent the whole time wishing it were written by Joss Whedon and starring... almost any other actress out there. Gina Torres was our top pick, but there's a bag of potatoes in my kitchen that's on the short list for the job (what with Jones being their competition). Even if the project ultimately falls to pieces, JJ can usually put together a hell of a pilot. With Alcatraz? Not even close. There are a number of amazing shows out there that had bad or mediocre pilots, but JJ's trajectory is almost always in the other direction. That does not bode well for Alcatraz.

I like to think that in its original iteration, Alcatraz was as badass as it should be and that it was the network that tied their hands and foisted mass appeal on them in the form of a crime procedural. Whatever the cause, that's far and away the show's weakest story element. It's weakest overall element, of course is the cast. Wow. I'm hoping the show starts to gel into more of a serial as they go along and that the overarching storylines take over as the season progresses. The concept of Madsen's grandfather being one of the prisoners who has come back, although hokey and predicable, opens some interesting doors as well. In a perfect world, the show would use the first few episodes to build a bit of an army of prisoners from Alcatraz and then stop having the baddie of the week elements for the most part. I realize that's probably not going to happen, but a girl can dream. Hey, they have middle America to appeal to, dontcha know, and they can't be confusing them with actual storytelling. Ugh.

Again, it wasn't a total disaster and it does have some things going for it. I just wish I'd gotten to see more of those things in the pilot. I also wish so many of those things weren't the same things Lost had (hell, even the music sounds exactly the same). As is, most of the show's assets are theoretical. In my mind, they have a lot of a good stuff to work with. On the screen, much less so. The production values are high and show is well-made, even if the talent onscreen and offscreen leaves a bit to be desired. Hopefully they'll settle into their roles and be more at home with who they're supposed to be... or, you know, Sarah Jones could get hit by a bus. One or the other, really. I'll give it a few more episodes to find its feet and establish itself, but after two episodes, I'm left with a "meh." And... more than a few unintentional laughs... My brother and I really had a field day with this one. They just made it too easy.

Pilot Grade: C+

TVD: Klausoline?

2012-01-13T13:29:00.011-07:00

It's a rare show that can pull the rug out from under me, but The Vampire Diaries succeeds in spades. Sure, some of the more typical A-plot elements are telegraphed in advance and are easy to construct a probable path for, but it's the little things that they set up that I never saw coming (or never knew I wanted to see coming) that mean the most. In last night's foray (episode 3.11, "Our Town"), an excellent episode all around, the best and most intriguing development wasn't Elena's harrowing near death/near vamp thrillride with Stefan, it wasn't Stefan's casual assassinations of Klaus' hybrids, and it wasn't even the dead body at the end (jesus, this town has enough to worry about without actual humans killing people). No, the most compelling moment was a two minute scene with one of the unlikeliest pairings imaginable.

Not only did the tone and substance of Klaus and Caroline's conversation surprise me, but the implications thereof bowled me over. For as much as I enjoy the love triangle relationshippy stuff with this show, it's never been the primary reason for watching for me. It still isn't, but the writers keep finding more and more ways to make the inter-personal dynamics layered and intriguing, while generally shying away from the more tween-style romances. Sure there are elements here and there, but TVD always gives it something more. For example, a few episodes back, when Elena tells Damon that Stefan won't come back because he loves her, but because he loves Damon, the audience believes it. At its core, this show is about family and the writers keep finding more and more ways to explore that notion and punch you in the gut with it (in a good way). Klaus' emphasis on his family has been an overweening motivation since the middle of last season and has come to a head with Stefan's current casket-thievin' shenanigans. While Klaus has generally been painted as the uber-villain/the ultimate big bad, the show gives him moments of vulnerability that elucidate who he really is as a person. Though few and far between, their infrequency makes them really hit home. Our first glimmer of his long-suppressed humanity came with flashbacks to his human life and his reactions to his then current situation with his father, sister, and brother. In terms of Klaus' interactions with the citizens of Mystic Falls, his emotional range has been mostly limited to rage, vindictiveness, and frustration. Until now.

That beautiful scene between Klaus and Caroline took me completely by surprise, but didn't feel forced or inconsistent at all. THAT is the hallmark of good writing. I never saw this coming, but now that it's here, it makes perfect sense. Beyond that, it's insanely awesome. I honestly had no idea what to expect when Klaus came to Caroline's door, intent on who-know-what. My initial thought was that he was most concerned with gaining an invitation into the house (but do originals need an invitation? I don't think so...), and then he'd bargain with the key players, twisting the knife until he was willing to save her (from the bite we all knew Tyler would impart). What I was met with, quite to the contrary, was an unexpectedly sweet, poignant, almost yearning discourse between two characters who've had only limited interaction thus far. Caroline's still-living, still-human friends tried their best to cheer her up on her birthday, but the life she had that had birthdays in it no longer exists. While Elena, Matt McCArdboard, and Bonnie von Needstodiesoon helped her mourn her old life, it was Klaus who really opened her eyes to the possibilities of her new life. "You can see the world, do everything you've ever dreamed. You can have a thousand birthdays." To hear Klaus, who understands what she's going through in a way that her human-friends can't, espouse the wonders of eternal life gave Caroline a new lease. For the first time in a long time, Caroline could relate. While Damon would never admit to his humanity or his occasional urges to let it all go and die the true death, Klaus cops to conflicted feelings about the whole situation. He tells Caroline he's considered dying a number of times over the centuries and knows exactly what she's thinking. Sometimes, when you feel all alone, there is nothing more comforting that someone knowing what you're going through and telling you it'll be all right. This episode was about moving on, about letting go of who you were and embracing who you are, and only Klaus could make Caroline see that.

Beyond what Klaus actually said, it was the way he said it that really hit home. No longer the mustache-twirling Evil League of Evil founding father, Klaus' interactions with Caroline was unbelievably soft and caring. It was as though he was tending to a sick loved one. Klaus has expressed his almost obsessive love for his family in a number of ways, but never before have we seen him interact with anyone in this way before. As it was happening, it not only gave Klaus a whole new layer to explore, but it made him sympathetic to the audience in a way I hardly thought possible. The fact that he saved Caroline's life, specifically, is important. She is inconsequential to his plans (as far as we know). Not only that, but she's been beat up and brutalized more than probably any other character, even Elena. I adore Caroline. Everyone does. And anyone who makes her see that her new life is one worth living, saves her life, and makes it all okay wins about a million points in my book. In a way, it's kind of like Jesse on Breaking Bad. He's so wonderful, and so mistreated, that I find my allegiances switching to whoever is treating him well at the moment. So let it be with Caroline.

Above and beyond all of that, that scene opened doors that I never would have thought could be opened and never knew I wanted them to be. I had never even considered a Klaus and Caroline pairing (whether romantic or not), but as I was watching that scene, not only did such a prospect totally work with the narrative, but it appealed to me on a number of levels. As I started to think about a relationship between the two, it struck me. Awesome. Simply awesome. I don't know how this will manifest or even whether Klaus' intentions are genuine (if this is all a big game, that would be amazing yet devastating), but I'm so, so intrigued to see it. That he saved her life was compelling enough, but that he gave her a beautiful bracelet (necklace?) for her birthday added that little something extra. Again, I could see where, eventually, this is an elaborate scheme to turn her against her friends (hell, that bracelet could be spelled or something), but I could see it going the other way entirely. Klaus is desperate for connection to people. Desperate for family. Desperate for love. He's been loathed and rejected his whole life and I can totally see where he'd find himself fancying someone as kickass as Caroline. The fact that she probably reminds him of Rebekah to a degree makes it all the more plausible. He just staked his one ally and now he's truly all alone. Could this be a scheme? Could this be genuine? Could this be both? I can't wait to find out.

In all honesty, the prospect of them as a romantic pairing is pretty fabulous. The thought of Caroline becoming a big bad in her own right is even more fabulous. Caroline got about 800 times better after becoming a vampire, so who knows how awesome she could become if she were a bad vampire. Hell, it did wonders for Stefan. This show burns through story faster than any other show on the air, and I keep thinking they'll run out of road, but they just keep building more and better highways to cruise down. Klausoline may be the best yet. I never even would have thought of them as a potential pairing before last night. Now, that's all I can think of.

This season has been about personal transformation and change. Stefan lost his soul (or did he?), Damon bared his, and Elena went from being a whiny damsel to actually pretty badass. Add Klaus and Caroline to that list. All these characters (and others as well) are on a journey of self-discovery and identity. Last night may have hit hardest with Klaus and Caroline, but a close second was Elena. I loved that scene at the end on the bridge. Caroline finally said goodbye to her old life and Elena is trying to follow suit. She doesn't have to be "that girl" anymore. She has taken charge of her own destiny in a way I never would have expected in the first two seasons. It's incredibly refreshing and makes me like her about 50 times more. In previous seasons, I've always kind of thought Damon could do a lot better. Now, Elena is finally becoming the person I always wanted her to be. Just in time to give up on vampires and Damon altogether. I think that kiss last week, a real kiss, rocked Elena to the core. I think she loves Damon more than she'd ever admit, but in her mind, that kiss was step one down the vampire-werewolf-doppelganger-hybrid rabbit hole and made her re-evalutate her feelings entirely. Meeting Stefan was the beginning of Mystic Falls' dubious honor of murderiest town on the planet, and in a number of ways, she can't imagine going down that road again. No matter how much she loves him. She's been loving blindly and entirely for year now and it's gotten about 13,870 people killed. I can see where that might cause someone to take pause... especially after her last vampire boyfriend just almost drove her off a bridge...

I'm not sure where we're headed from here, but I can't wait to find out. Although I can absolutely see where Elena would want to separate herself from all of this, the final scene with her and Matt opened a door that I wish would have stayed closed. Matt has always been a block of wood and the prospect of a rekindled romance doesn't excite me. But, I'm confident the show will make whatever happens as awesome as possible. Bring it.

Stray Observations:

Jeremy needed some time off, that's for sure. It is very much to this show's credit that they realized he didn't have much to do and sent him on his way. I actually like Jeremy quite a lot, and they did a fabulous job of sending him off on a high note (ensuring we'll be happy to see him when he returns), but sometimes a character just isn't necessary. This show is very willing to kill off characters, but they know how to work around it as well.
In that same vein, I love how if a character isn't needed in an episode, he/she simply isn't in the episode. True Blood could definitely take a page here. TVD's storytelling is tight and efficient and they know how to use their resources wisely. There are very few (if any, really) throwaway plotlines and it's very much appreciated.
"Hey Jeremy, your suitcase looks a little light. How about you take some extra baggage in the form of the most annoying, sanctimonious, holier-than-thou witch in town?" Bonnie needs to go. Look, this show needs a witch. I grant that. But does it have to be her? She's not even a very good witch! Seriously, when lighting birthday candles takes that much effort, what good are you? What's worse, your friends, who've seen basically all manor of supernatural everything, were actually impressed by your candle-lighting ability. Come to think of it, for someone as inept as she, that was kinda spectacular...
The Klaus and Caroline dynamic, whether potentially romantic, conspiratorial, or both, is intriguing enough on its own, but then throw Tyler and his sire-bond in the mix and things get even more twisted and fabulous. Can't wait to see how that turns out.
Meredith Fell: "Some English guy just promised to match all the donations made tonight."
Alaric: "Wait, what do you mean English guy?"
(Ummm... a guy who's from England?)
The woman who plays Dr. Fell is actually married to Paul Wesley in real life. TVD fun fact.
Alaric: "Wait, you mean you actually care who lives or dies?"
Damon: "I have a short list."
("Have you seen my list? It's a piece of paper that says 'Elena' on it.")
Caroline: "Are you going to kill me?"
Klaus: "Not on your birthday."
(I loved how Klaus seemed genuinely offended that Caroline would imply he might kill someone on their birthday. Hehe. We all have a line we won't cross, even the baddest of the bads. Klaus' line is apparently covered in frosting.)
Even though it appears that Elena may be moving toward living boyfriends, her sexual chemistry with Damon is scorching. Seriously, it becomes more and more apparent with each passing episode that Ian and Nina are a couple.
I love that in Mystic Falls, vampires, werewolves, witches, and hybrids are par for the course in terms of murder, but a regular guy? THAT's the surprise. The fact that it looks like it could have been Alaric makes it the real cliffhanger (although I seriously doubt it was him... more like Meredith, methinks, but really, who the hell knows).

My Top 10 TV Shows of 2011

2011-12-19T10:40:00.013-07:00

I'm really hoping that with the new year, my zest for, well, anything really, will return, but until then, this blog is going to be pretty sparse. It's not that there isn't plenty to talk about TV wise (the fact that Once Upon a Time just killed off one of the few characters I liked is currently irking me and the fate of Boardwalk Empire sans Jimmy looms large), but I just can't seem to care enough to type. Venting to the kiddies at work is my current outlet. I highly recommend everyone get their coworkers hooked on all the same shows.

Anyhow, in spite of my apathy, I couldn't not put together a top 10 list of the best television programs of the year, and then some significantly pettier, dorkier lists as well. Without further ado, and in no particular order...

MY TOP 10 SHOWS OF 2011

JUSTIFIED
My love for this show knows no bounds, and the fact that it's been rather conspicuously absent from my schedule since March is kind of maddening. That said, the show is finally starting up in about a month and I can't wait. FX has been re-airing the first season and even though I've already seen it at least twice, I couldn't help but watch again. What's more, it didn't even occur to me to fast-forward through the boring or annoying parts because, well, there aren't any. It's not a crazy, fast-paced, explosion a minute kind of show or anything, but I find that I'm simply riveted from beginning to end. While season 1 was fantastic, season 2 brought something even more amazing to the table: Mags Bennet. When you have a cast of characters that includes the likes of the Crowder clan, it's hard to imagine someone stealing the spotlight, but Margo Martindale was electrifying. My one quibble with the show in general is that female characters tend to play the damsel, but the addition of Mags (and Loretta for that matter), balanced the scales in all the best ways. Oh sure, we started the "Oh, for hell's sakes, Winona!" drinking game during her tenure as the dithering damsel with sticky fingers, Mags was there to temper the gender gap. She was layered and warm and terrifying and ruthless and caring, oftentimes all at once. I'm incredibly sad that Mags won't be back for season 3, and her loss, coupled with the loss of Helen and Loretta, the other tremendous female characters on the show, means that we're left with Winona and Ava. If any show has the power to turn them into more than moronic damsels and fluttering love interests, it's Justified, but their treatment of these two thus far gives me pause... That said, the promos have Raylan and Boyd seemingly teaming up, so there's only so much I can worry about.

BREAKING BAD
Once upon a time, when television aficionados would herald the greatness of the medium or defend it against the slings and arrows of critics defaming it as pulp, they would call on The Wire to justify their cause. Now they call on Breaking Bad. This show is just so, so good. This is one of the few shows that I've actually addressed in fair measure lately, so I'll keep this short. Maybe. While it's been a powerhouse of awesome and artistry since day one, I think this most recent season might have been their best yet. The brilliance with which the writers balanced so many different factions, agendas, mental and emotional priorities, political concerns, and kingpins is nothing short of amazing. At any given time, I found myself pulling for someone different, condemning characters I once loved, and exalting the baddest of the bad. Then it would all change in the coming week. The best part of all is that these shifts in my loyalties were not based on the most ostentatious or sensational of events. By contrast, with Breaking Bad, it's the quiet moments that shed the most light and send me reeling. Which isn't to say that the show is lacking in big, insane, WTF moments or anything. There are certainly plenty of those. It's just that with Breaking Bad, a scene with a few guys sitting around a table talking (or a scene with no talking at all) is just as gripping and terrifying as the deadliest shootout, the biggest explosion, or a mass poisoning. This season saw the end of Tio Salamanca (ding! ding! ding!) and Gus Fring, two irreplaceable powerhouses, but I have every confidence that next season will see the introduction of even fiercer, quirkier baddies. In a lot of ways, I think the season 4 finale could have served well as the series finale, but I'm sure glad it wasn't.

REVENGE
Going into every fall pilot season, I have shows that I'm excited about, shows that I know I'll hate, and shows that I'm willing to give a shot, but fully suspect I'll drop them in a couple of weeks. Revenge definitely fell into the third category. Little did I know it would quickly turn into the sudsiest, juiciest, most delectably addictive soap opera to hit TV in years. The first few episodes had me a little worried that I was headed for a revenge procedural, with Emily dispatching of one of her father's foes each week, all wrapped up in a nice little bow. Much to my delight, those early episodes were only setting up the tangle web to come. This show is a soap opera, which is generally used in the pejorative, but there's not guilt in this pleasure. With any genre, there are going to be good ones and bad ones. For genres like "chick flick", "rom com", "soap opera", and "crime procedural", the bad so often outnumber the good that the genre as a whole gets a bad wrap. Well, Revenge may be a soap, but it's a bloody good one. The story-telling is lightning fast, but there's also a long con that sweeps maliciously from episode to episode, tying things tighter and raising the stakes. The characters are surprisingly layered and complex, giving the writers plenty of room to explore not just the outlandish soapy plot elements, but the more intriguing character elements as well. The cast in general is very strong, but my heart belongs to Nolan (which, given my propensity for siding with the smart, snarky game-changer should come as no surprise). Revenge is truly a watercooler show, even in an age when everyone seems to watch shows at different times. With Revenge, you simply can't afford to risk missing it or you'll be subject to 45 minutes of heated discussion without you. I'm not sure where the show is headed in the long run (although I hear a move to New York is in store for season 2), but I'm definitely along for the ride.

BEING HUMAN (UK)
Although the US version tries desperately to keep pace with it's British predecessor, it's an incredibly high bar that it will never surpass. The most recent season of the British version ended many months ago, but it was still one of the first shows to come to mind when compiling this list. Being Human, on paper, has one of the most absurd, campy, tween concepts in town. And yet, the writers brilliantly explore the human condition through werewolves, ghosts, and vampires. Indeed, by looking at what humans are when they aren't human at all, it sheds light on humanity as a whole. This most recent season was brutal and beautiful and heartbreaking. The writers had a plan from day one, plotted and executed it perfectly, and ended right where they should have, even if that was the most devastating place possible. It's months later and I still can't believe Mitchell is truly gone. As the season began, and it was foretold that he would be killed by a werewolf, fans couldn't help but wonder if that werewolf would be George. Against all inclinations to the contrary, as the season concluded, it only made sense that George would end Mitchell's life. It had to be done, I knew it had to be done, but it was devastating for all involved. No matter what Mitchell had done, no matter in how many ways his inhumanity wreaked havoc, he wanted so desperately to be a good person, but it just never happened. Until the bitter end. The wolf-shaped bullet ending his life was, in its own way, the most human thing to have happened. I honestly don't know where the show will go without his handsome mug, but even if it falls apart, I can always remember last season as being something truly special. The US version can try and try all it likes to match the darkness, the brutality, the hilarity, and the humanity of its predecessor, but I can't really fault it for falling short.

SUITS
Last year, almost all of USA Network's line-up got a nod in my "Best Of" list, but this year, only their newest show garners a spot. While one-time favorites slumped, fell by the wayside, or decreased in quality, Suits arose as the banner show for the network. I assumed this would be yet another "blue skies" procedural for the network, taking the exact same principles and elements of their other shows and wrapping them in the guise of "lawyer show," I was very pleasantly surprised to find the network's most adult offering to date. It has "lawyer show" elements, of course, but it's more of a serial than I've ever seen on USA, it takes more chances narratively, and it even adopts the standards and practices for foul language that networks FX and AMC have employed for years. The occasional "shit" may not seem like much, but it marks a shift in terms of tone and audience. I recently noticed that Covert Affairs has taken a similar tack, so I'm hopeful that as the network takes more chances, the quality and originality would follow suit. Don't get me wrong, I've always enjoyed the "blue skies" approach taken by the network, but after a few years, it starts to wear on you with its sameness. For various reasons, USA's other options haven't retained their luster, but the sameness is one of the main factors. Burn Notice has played the same hand for the past three seasons, needing a reinvention sooner than later, In Plain Sight got pregnant and ruined the show, Covert Affairs is somehow surprisingly boring, seeming to have lost its narrative thrust, its sense of direction, and its understanding of its own characters, and Psych is... well, it's Psych. If you've seen one episode, you've seen them all. (White Collar is really the only other show on the network that has upped the ante and kept me totally enthralled.) Suits (oh yeah! we're talking about Suits!) bucks the trend of sameness in the best ways possible. It takes the best elements of the network's shows and adds so much more. Suits isn't afraid to have heroes that do bad things, characters that are unlikable, and real tension. All of this is undercut with an incredibly charming bromance, a lot of laughs, and several ongoing storylines to keep the show from stagnating or stalling. In the best surprise of all, they have crafted characters that are layered and intriguing in surprising ways for this network. Indeed, the show's lead, Harvey Spector, isn't particularly likeable on a number of levels, but that's what makes him so special. He's not the kind of character I usually latch onto, but I'm completely enamored. This kind of connection with characters, and the knowledge that they won't always do what you expect them to, makes for a surprising ride where I genuinely don't know what's going to happen every single minute of every episode. It's a lovely change of pace for USA and one that I hope continues. I can't wait for Suits to come back and have spent the downtime re-watching this year's episodes.

GAME OF THRONES
It honestly took me about half of the first season to really get invested in this show, but once I did, I found myself really looking forward to it week-to-week. Even if it weren't my kind of show, the size and scope and scale of the production should garner it a spot on most lists. My initial qualms with the show stemmed from the seeming marginalization of the female characters. Based on the time and setting, it made sense, but that didn't mean they deserved to be afterthoughts. As the season progressed, however, I was very pleased to see the female characters taking center stage and becoming substantive movers and shakers in the narrative. As the season drew to a close, my qualms were fully assuaged. Rumors of storylines to come have also bolstered my confidence. It's not the easiest show to jump into if you haven't read the books, but I think the writers and producers did a nice job of paring down the cast and explaining who was who in a mostly non-oppressive manner. I have always appreciated a show that's willing to kill people off (as long as it makes sense for the story and isn't to the clear detriment of the show... *cough* Once Upon a Time *cough*), and Game of Thrones does not hold back. I had heard that the characters who start off the series are not the ones you end up with in the end, but this didn't truly hit home until Ned was beheaded. That takes balls. As much as I enjoyed Ned, killing him off was true to form and turned the narrative on its head. That's the kind of storytelling that keeps me on my toes and genuinely surprises me. When all bets are off, there's a terrifying sense of the unknown that I absolutely love and dread with equal measure. For someone who watches as much television as I do, it's not easy to quash my expectations, so when a show manages to achieve such a feat, it gets rewarded with a place on this list. Game of Thrones wasn't perfect, but it came close enough. I'd tune in just for Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish alone, but Robb Stark and Jon Snow don't hurt either. Now that the show has it's legs and a better grasp of how to turn this story into a series, I'm very hopeful that season 2 was be even more sensational that season 1. It'll certainly be just as expensive to produce. Wow, HBO knows how to loosen the purse-strings and I can't thank them enough.

COMMUNITY
No top 10 list would be complete without the best comedy on TV. No, not Modern Family. Indeed, while Community continues to push the boundaries and have me rolling in the aisles for new and surprising reasons each week, Modern Family seems to get more and more boring. I used to really enjoy the show, but more and more, I find myself smiling on occasion, and almost never laughing out loud. This is most delightedly not the case with Community. Most shows on TV can be likened to other contemporaries or predecessors, but Community is genuinely unlike any other show. In any given week, the show somehow manages to combine hilarious gags, clever jokes, erudite allusions, and a hell of a lot of heart with a willingness to play with form and narrative unlike any other show. You truly never know what exactly to expect from Community, whether it be a Spaghetti Western, a musical, an homage to an obscure movie, a parody of an entire genre, a more conventional comedy episode with a splash of anime, or anything and everything in between. They play with storytelling in a way that makes me smile every time. All the while, the show maintains its warmth and heart. The show isn't too cool for school, and it embraces it. Indeed, this collection of characters is probably the most endearing family on TV. Other comedies find themselves hitting the same beats again and again, what with comedy being a genre where true character growth and development is difficult to manage, but Community throws out the rulebook, giving it's characters real journeys to follow all the while making me crack up. I'm heartbroken that NBC has shelved the show until who-knows-when. I realize that the ratings are bad, but so are the ratings of every other show on the network. I don't want to live in a world where dreck like Whitney and dumbass shlock like Two and Half Men survive, but Community gets put on hiatus. Oh, America. You make me sad sometimes. I do hope that NBC keeps sucking just long enough for Community to get another season. They're only about a season away from being able to be sold into syndication, so hopefully NBC will take that into consideration. Come back, Community! Come back!!!

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES
The CW doesn't often get a lot of love when it comes to critical acclaim, but more and more, even the hold-outs have had to admit that The Vampire Diaries is one hell of a show. No longer mistakenly thought of as a Twilight rip-off or True Blood lite, The Vampire Diaries has set itself apart as a kickass supernatural thriller. It's storytelling is tight and compelling, giving viewers a thrill-a-minute, tantalizing cliffhangers, and a surprising amount of depth and character advancement. Sure it has its flaws, but ounce for ounce, it's one of the best shows out there. While the last part of season two got a bit muddled with the moonstone and the curse, season 3 has been its best yet. Two of the best aspects of the show are that it's willing to kill off important and beloved characters and if a character doesn't need to be in an episode he/she isn't in it. True Blood could learn a lot from TVD in this regard. TVD blazes through story at a breakneck pace, introducing new characters and killing off others in near equal measure. This keeps the cast from spiraling out of control the way that True Blood has. What's more, the storytelling is tight and interlaced among the characters. While True Blood has about 87 different storylines going at once, half of which have nothing to do with the others, TVD brings everything together in the most tantalizing of possible ways, ending each episode (if not each segment) with a jaw-dropping cliffhanger. There's an insane amount of character history and supernatural mythology that has been doled out over the past two and a half seasons, but somehow the show makes it all work (well, mostly). When Rebekah revealed the history of her family, the origins of werewolves, the original vampires, her brother as a hybrid, the sun and the moon curse, and everything in between, it... actually made a lot of sense! Sure there are certain things that we just kind of ignore, but for the most part, the writers put it altogether in a way that worked. No small feat, that. The show also manages to impart all of that history and mythology in a captivating way. Seriously, where most shows put me to sleep with plot exposition and info dumps, TVD makes those some of their best episodes. Seriously, in a recent episode, the entirety of the actual action that took place was Elena talking to Rebekah while Damon and Stefan hung out. Sounds like a snooze-fest, but it was exciting, revelatory, and fabulous. Best of all? Elena and Stefan, who used to be on the bland and boring side, have become interesting and badass in their own ways. Evil Stefan is even better than I would have guessed and Elena has finally taken some control over her life. Now if we can just kill off Bonnie and Matt, we'll be good to go!

THE GOOD WIFE
This is one show that has received a fair bit of press on this blog (more so than the other deserving entries on this list), but I promise, it's still not enough. That this is one of the best dramas on TV goes against so many factors. The show airs on network TV, said network is CBS of all things, the show features actual adults, it tackles sensitive issues like religion, politics, and money in just about every episode, it's been moved around on the schedule, and it skews older in terms of demographic (for some unknown reason). And yet, it survives. This show is smart and sexy and has more than a few serial elements to it. In a network viewing landscape that has seen the success of one crappy crime procedural after another, The Good Wife bucks the trend. Thank god! Season 2 was absolutely amazing. Seriously, the last 5 or 6 episodes could each have served as the jaw-dropping, gut-wrenching season finale, but they just kept piling on the awesome, episode after episode, culminating in one of the best season finales I've ever seen. So good, in fact, that had the show been unjustly axed after season 2, it could have served as one hell of a send off. Season 3 hasn't quite kept pace with the insanity of the last half of season 2, but it's building slowly and surely. One of the most heartbreaking factors of season 2, Kalinda and Alicia's falling out, reverberates through season 3 in a very real, restrained way. One of the things I've always loved best about the show is that the female characters are allowed to have layers, agendas, and a well-rounded presence on the screen. They're also allowed to be friends. On most shows, women are invariably pitted as sexual rivals. On The Good Wife, as with the real world, women are friends, they support one another, and form complex bonds and relationships with one another. Seeing Kalinda and Alicia, the best of friends, fall apart was devastating, but seeing the slow easing of tensions over season 3 has been incredibly rewarding. This show knows how to hit all the right buttons and it doesn't casually forget about things that have happened before. I'm constantly amazed at how a person, an event, or a piece of information comes back many episodes later like a lightning bolt. This show has an amazing cast, an enviable list of guest stars, and Eli Gold to boot. Alan Cumming is completely magnetic as Eli, but this is so good that even when he's not in an episode, I don't notice until long after the show is done. As with The Vampire Diaries, The Good Wife knows how to economize storytelling. If they don't need a character, they don't have that character. Case closed. (Heh, get it? Case closed? They're lawyers? I'll shut up now.)

SHAMELESS
Any and all US imports of British shows are met with extreme scrutiny and prejudice from this humble TV watcher. The same goes for animated shows being adapted to live action. In general, I simply don't see the point. In most cases, the original is by far the superior and a remake or adaptation seems unnecessary and counter-intuitive. It's with this bias in mind that I'm surprised at how much I grew to love Showtime's US adaptation of Shameless, a raunchy British program that I was honestly not too familiar with. To this day, I've only seen a couple of the episodes of the British series, but to my delight, the US adaptation took the principles of its predecessor, made the show its own, and made it really damn good. It took me a couple of episodes to really invest in the show, finding William H. Macy's character to be more of a hindrance than a celebrity draw, but as the show settled in and found its feet, it managed to craft interesting, complex characters whose interdynamics sucked me right in. At its heart, Shameless is about a family. For all of its dysfunction, and there plenty to go around, at the end of the day, the burdens and traumas they suffer makes them one of the closest knit families on TV. When you're that poor, that desperate, and that downtrodden, all you have is each other. The family simply has to work together just to survive. On a less dire level, I can relate. My family was by no means as bad off as the Gallagher clan, but it was very clear to all of us from a very young age that we don't have the luxury of bickering or fighting or holding petty grudges. We're all in this together, and a lot of the time, that's all we have. In speaking with other people, I'm constantly amazed at how well my family got along, how close we all were (and are), and how willing we are to give relatives money without any expectation of repayment. I always assumed all families were like that when I was a kid, but as it turns out, we were in the minority. Anyhow, with the Gallaghers, this hits home in a number of social, psychological, and financial ways. It was so heartbreaking to watch Fiona, the eldest daughter turned mother, trying to break free of all the responsibility, only to find that she simply couldn't. The last few episodes of the season were tremendous and showed how this kind of close-knit dependence on one another has its wonderful aspects and also its insidious underpinnings. Her siblings want her to go, they know she's paid her dues, but she just can't leave them. What started out as a raunchy dramedy that was trying too hard to be shocking quickly morphed into a searing character piece with the family unit as a whole being the most important single character of all. It's been gone for entirely too long and I can't wait for season 2 to premiere early next year.

**HONORABLE MENTIONS**

Alphas
It's a genre show, but it genuinely managed to put a new spin on an old routine. Most importantly for any genre show, it focused on the characters as much as the storyline, so that helped turn it into quite a quality program by the end of its first season.

The Chicago Code
Gone, but not forgotten. I'm not a huge fan of cop shows, but this one was excellent. It's ratings weren't spectacular, but they were steady and decent. This show really had Fox's once chance at any kind of dramatic critical acclaim, but they opted for poorly crafted CG dinosaurs and a bickering family that just refused to get eaten by them instead. Boo.

Nikita
Season 2 hasn't quite had the same focus or narrative drive as season 1, but this show is still a solid genre show that knows how to craft a spy thriller. Covert Affairs should take notice. This show is 15 times more entertaining and exciting on 1/10th the budget. Where Covert Affairs is so bland this year the background is more interesting than the story, Nikita takes what it has and makes the most of it.

Hell on Wheels
I'm... not entirely sure why I'm enjoying this show so much. Nothing... really... happens. But, I find I get swept up in whatever is happening on screen and I don't seem to mind that over the course of several episodes, we've basically built 10 feet of railroad and... ridden some horses? Whatever the reason, I'm digging it.

Boardwalk Empire
If my list above were a top 11, this would have made the cut. It made last year's list, but their second season took a lot time to really get me enthralled. I got several episodes behind because I just didn't feel very invested anymore, but once I got caught up, I could appreciate that in a number of ways, it was better than ever.

White Collar
Aside from Suits, this is really the only other USA network offering that I'm excited about. This last year the show hit quite a stride, and while there were some casting decisions I still can't believe, on the whole, this is a light, fun caper with enough depth to keep me eagerly anticipating its return next month. And then, of course, there's Matt Bomer, so it may as well be a freeze-frame for 42 minutes and I'd be just as pleased.

Aside from my overall top shows of the year (and well-deserving honorable mentions), there were some other odds and ends and categories that I just had to include in my year-end review as well. Here are some random judgments and dubious distinctions...

Shows that Showed Signs of Recovery Only to Flatline Once Again:

Glee
After the craptastic second season, I had pretty low expectations for season 3. When the season started off and seemed to have gained a slight grasp of continuity and storytelling, I was ready to put this in the Most Improved Show category... Until a few episodes ago when it all got shitty again. Seriously, that Christmas episode was even more painful than usual.
How I Met Your Mother
Started off a bit better than expected, but then Lily and Marshall got pregnant, then Robin got pregnant, or didn't... oh, who the hell cares. It was awful either way.

Worst Hair and/or Clothes:

Robin (How I Met Your Mother)
Apparently barrenness leads to hideous hair and horrible wardrobe choices? That's all I can guess, because why else would they make her look that way?
The Entire Cast (Parenthood)
Okay, maybe not the entire cast, but I think it's safe to say they hit critical mass about 3 characters back. When you hit 80%, is there any real reason to split hairs? (Heh, get it? Oh lord, that pun was almost as bad as Haddie's permed bangs... sorry about that.)
Dr. Reid (Criminal Minds)
Not going to lie, he's the reason I started watching the show. His look and persona were a huge part of the draw. Now he has this unfortunate fuzzy, choppy something or other on his head and it just takes the charm away...
Rachel (Glee)
The storytelling wasn't the only casualty during season 2...

Best Chemistry:

Damon and Elena (The Vampire Diaries)
A lot of real-life couples fall flat on screen, but these two totally sizzle. Seriously, that (fully-clothed) scene where he ran his hand along her ribs was sexier than some of the most explicit sex scenes I've seen.
Eli and Kalinda (The Good Wife)
They may not be sleeping together (that I know of... that would be kind of awesome, actually), but the rapport between Alan Cumming and Archie Panjabi is completely irresistible. Eli's chemistry with just about anyone is giggle-worthy and fabulous, but with Kalinda, he sees a true peer. He doesn't bullshit her the way he does other people and she doesn't try to manipulate him the way should would someone else. The professional courtesy is hilarious and undeniable.
Nolan and Tyler (Revenge)
These two are both so conniving, so manipulative, and so driven that it's hard to know just what to make of them as a pair, but one thing is for sure, their chemistry is sexy as hell. Although Tyler might claim otherwise, I'm guessing they're both about a 3 on the Kinsey scale, so anything goes. Their couple portmanteau is "TyleNol" by the way, which is just about the best I've ever seen.

Speaking of Magnetism on Screen, Here are My Irrational TV Crushes of 2011:

Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)
It took me a while to really connect with the show, but his presence among the cast was never an equivocal one.
Jesse Pinkman (Breaking Bad)
Aaron Paul is such a tremendous actor that yes, I kinda sorta really adore a murderer/drug dealer. I mainly just want to give the guy a hug. He certainly needs one.
Harvey Specter (Suits)
As I mentioned above, I'm a little surprised by this one, but Gabriel Macht is just beautiful and he manages to make a slick, corporate, 1 percenter unbelievably sexy.
Johnny Iuzzini (Top Chef: Just Desserts)
Love him. Aside from being talented, charming, and easy on the eyes, he's a bit of a gay icon and he's totally fine with that (even though he's straight). That wins him a hell of a lot of points in my book. Rather than being threatened by attention from the gay community, he embraces it. WIN.
Seymour Birkoff (Nikita)
I know, I know, of all the beautiful people on that show, I'm in love with the snarky computer nerd. That's just how I roll. Not that Michael or Owen or Ryan or anyone else isn't a winner, but my heart belongs to Birkoff.
Nikita (Nikita)
Okay, it belongs to Birkoff or Nikita. It's a toss-up. Maggie Q is amazing. She simply could not be any more fabulous. Or badass. Or gorgeous. Could I be her when I grow up? Pretty please? Ooh, or Kalinda!
Hardison (Leverage)
It's a mid-level show, to be sure, but Hardison makes it all worth it. He's far and away the best part of the show and certainly the easiest to look at.
Mitchell (Being Human UK)
Goddamn, he's beautiful. Yeah, yeah, he slaughtered a train full of people... Still beautiful. Sometimes, it's what's on the outside that counts.
Paulo (The Borgias)
Okay, I admit his hair is not doing him any favors, but that's what you get when you're cast in a period piece. That said, Luke Pasqualino will always be Freddie to me and that's really all it takes. My darling Freddie (sob). Love him. Unfortunate historically-accurate haircut and all.
Nolan (Revenge)
He may not be the most conventionally attractive guy on the show, but for me, personality, character, and intelligence count for about 80%. Being a 3 on the Kinsey scale certainly doesn't hurt either.
Tim Gutterson (Justified)
His character is pretty much the exact opposite of what I would ever really want, but I just adore him. Seriously, a law enforcement officer with a history in the military? Yikes. And yet, his manner is so appealing and his demeanor so chill, I just can't help myself.
Jai Wilcox (Covert Affairs)
Sure it took me an entire season to stop calling him Mohinder, but that in no way diminishes the pretty. It's a very attractive cast in general (you know, as opposed to all those shows with ugly people), but he takes the cake. Not that he'd be able to eat it, but still. It may be a boring show, but the scenery is nice.
Damon (The Vampire Diaries)
No list of TV crushes would be complete without Damon Salvatore making an entry. It's a plain and simple fact that's beyond reproach or argument.

Well, kiddies, I think that's it for me this year. I'm hoping to be less of a slacker as the new year begins, but I excel at not giving a shit. We'll see. Happy viewing!

I hate that show! And yet...

2011-11-29T14:25:00.002-07:00

...I keep watching. Sometimes you just can't help yourself.

Hello my darling blog-readers (both of you). I kind of fell of the radar for a while there, but it has nothing to do with TV. If anything, TV is one of the few things keeping me from hurling myself in front of a bus. For various, mostly health-related reasons, my life has fallen apart around me, now largely comprised of teeny, tiny shards of bitterness and ugly crying. I finally gave up on ever feeling better ever again about a month ago and kinda, sorta stopped caring about most aspects of my life. Including blogging. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, even TV lost some of its luster and my enthusiasm for ranting and raving about it on this blog fell by the wayside. Seriously, you know those commercials for anti-depressants that have people sitting by windows wearing cable-knit sweaters and staring off into space? And then a sad, but eager dog walks into the room with a ball or a leash or something and the person feels even worse? That's pretty much where I've been lately. I always thought those ads were just cheesy, but after the year I've had, I've honestly starting thinking that maybe, just maybe, depression hurts, but Cymbalta can help. Well played, manipulative advertisers!

Anyway, that's all really just a preamble to the actual blogpost about shows I hate, but still watch. Unless of course, you majored in English and assume that I'm viewing my own experiences through the lens of television, translating the pathetic heap that is my life into a theoretical construct whereby I'm the star of my own show and it's a show I hate. 'Cause, you know, that's just how we roll. My inability to stop watching or help myself is manifested in the kind of show that you wish you could break up with, but simply can't. Much like these!:

PARENTHOOD
My brother and I both end up watching this show, but note frequently how much we hate it. My willingness to watch a show that annoys the ever-loving shit out of me somewhat spurs from the fact that the show is in an uncrowded timeslot (now that The Good Wife has moved to Sundays), but more than anything, this show is, far and away, the show I most love talking about just how much I hate it. There are just so many layers and facets to my hatred for the show! How could I give that up? The girls at work and I rehash the shows many non-sensical fights, juvenile decision-making skills, and impatient story-telling with a fair bit of fervor the following day and while the show drives me up the effing wall, the discussions make it all worth it. Why do I hate this show that show many critics and fans adore? The short version is that 1) the adults on this show act like petulant junior high school students, 2) the show has a sprawling cast of annoying characters, only a few of which do I care about, and most important of all, 3) the writers refuse to take their time. I could forgive a lot of the ridiculous fighting between family members (although holy shit, if my family fought this often, I'd have killed myself years ago) if the reasons for the fights were established in a more logical, deliberate fashion. Most recently, the show introduced Rachel, the young sexy secretary at the Luncheonette, much to the chagrin of new-mom Christina. Okay, fine. Sure it's a story that's as old as time, but I tried to be open-minded. Turns out, I should have been more cautious. The writers could have established Rachel over time as a real person that the audience actually cares about, but instead they tossed her into the mix as a cardboard cut-out sexpot with no personality or individuality. What's worse, they went for the inappropriate kiss with Adam like, the next week. Even worse than that, the writers immediately turned Christina's and Adam's marriage nuclear as a result. UGH. More than anything, I hate Parenthood because it could be so, so good, and it just isn't. The writers refuse to let the tension build, they seem pathologically unable to set up conflicts that make a whole lot of sense, and they go straight for the explosion without even lighting the fuse. If this were a comedy, they'd be hitting the punchline without telling the joke. When you deliver the punchline early, it's not funny. When you jump to the knock-down, drag-out argument without establishing the reasons, it loses most of its impact. This is basically the boy who cried wolf, only with childish, petty adults bitching at one another over nothing. After a while, you just stop listening. Had the writers taken their time with the Rachel storyline, played is slowly and subtly, allowing viewers to become invested in her as a character and allowing Christina's suspicions and insecurities build, the fight between her and Adam could have been devastating and gripping. As is, it's just another Tuesday at the Braverman house where Christina is the stereotypical nag and her husband is the hapless saint. Man alive, you'd think that people who fight this often would be better at it, but most of Christina's arguments fell flat or had no foundation and that just makes her unlikable and unsympathetic. When I take a step back and build up the necessary foundation in my head for Christina's instability and nervous breakdown, it honestly does make sense to me. But as it's presented, it just feels like the writers were too afraid to really examine what's going on with her and just went for the fireworks instead. For me, watching someone's gradual breakdown is far more gripping than a bickering match, but maybe that's just me. Shows like Breaking Bad and The Good Wife take their time. They slow-play the tension for as long as they can, tightening the noose, turning the knife, till the conflict boils over. When that's where an argument comes from, it's mesmerizing. With Parenthood? It's pat. I would love for the writers to take a chance on subtlety and let the storylines really simmer for a while. Were I writing the Rachel arc, I would have established her as a person the audience actually cares about while at the same time illuminating Adam's frustrations with his marriage and Christina's insecurities. When the time came for the kiss (assuming I'm following the basic structure they already took), I would have had the circumstances be more ambiguous. As is, this poor girl got drunk, pretty much accidentally kissed her boss and felt completely foolish over the whole thing. I'm sorry, that's just not grounds for World War III even if Adam did lie to her about firing Rachel. If I were writing this, I would have had the kiss be more of a kiss, made Adam's response to it more conflicted and uncertain, then had him downplay it's importance to Christina (assuming we live in a world where he ever would have told her in the first place). That way, when he and Christina fight, she's had time to get more and more justifiably concerned about the situation, he's had time to get conflicted about his own feelings, and Rachel is someone whose fate I'm actually invested in. When you go straight for the big finish, I don't sympathize with Christina, Adam just seems like a dolt, and I can barely remember Rachel's name. The show really could be awesome, much like the executive producer's previous project Friday Night Lights, but instead, it seems like an abridged Lifetime movie or a never-ending serious of "previously on" clips. It has its moments, it really does (Julia has been about 800% more likable this year), it just doesn't use those to make the series as good as it could be. Great bones to work with, frustrating-as-hell execution. Particularly in the hair and make-up this year.

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER
I've actually hated this show for a couple of years now, but god help me, I just keep watching. This one mostly boils down to time commitment. It's literally 21 minutes out of my week, so even though most episodes are pretty disappointing, and even though this season has flown even more off the rails than ever, it's just so damn easy to keep going. I think the recent revelation that Robin is pregnant was the final straw for me though. UGH. Are you kidding me?! So awful, so stupid, so... everything. I could go on and on about this, but I'll try to keep it short. I used to adore Robin as a character. I watched an episode from back in the day last night and it was like a sobering punch in the face, highlighting in excruciating detail what the writers have done to a character I once adored. I loved having a female character on TV who wasn't a simpering idiot, a dependent damsel, or a stereotypical lonely single woman who just wants to get married and have babies. She was smart, funny, easy-going, and wanted to live her life on her own terms. Now? Jesus, the hollow husk that is Robin is basically unrecognizable, and that's not just because of her hideous hair and clothes this season. What the hell happened to her? She somehow became this high-strung, irritating, shrill caricature who has ended up pregnant and doesn't seem to know what to do. Luckily, she became the polar opposite of who her character used to be at exactly the same time Barney became the antithesis of who he used to be! What a crazy, random happenstance! Look, I'm not saying that people can't change over time, but Robin's erratic meltdown over being pregnant and Barney's newfound love of relationships and babies is just ridiculous. If Robin really is who she used to be, a smart, savvy, independent woman who doesn't want children, she'd have an abortion and be done with it. I know, I know, this is a comedy where things like actual reality apparently never happen, but if that's the case, then maybe you shouldn't have such a character get pregnant. The Robin I once knew wouldn't fall apart like this, she'd take charge, terminate the pregnancy she never wanted and wouldn't have the children she can't stand. Barney would have been completely on board with this plan. The new and not improved versions of these characters will, I'm sure, go through with the pregnancy and never even mention abortion as an option. It's infuriating. God, it's like in Knocked Up where she ends up pregnant after a one-night stand, doesn't want the child, knows it will derail her life, and yet, what can ya do? It's not like there's a way to end a pregnancy or anything. Dear How I Met Your Mother, what the hell happened? When did you forget who these characters are and how to write for them? When did you decide that you didn't care enough about your female characters to give them anything beyond the stereotype (Lily has turned into quite a peach as well)? I've wanted to break up with this show for years now, what with the identity of the mother seemingly 34 seasons away, but there's always just enough to keep me tethered. I stopped caring about Ted ages ago (who?), and the rest of the cast have turned into irritating caricatures of themselves, but in spite of all that, there's always just enough to enjoy. It still has its moments, I grant that. But the crazy train of pregnant Robin might be more than I can stomach. So disappointing. So stupid. I'd say so jump-the-sharky, but we passed that milestone ages ago.

HART OF DIXIE
Oh dear god, this show is terrible. And my excuse for continuing to watch could not be flimsier. Quite simply put, it's in the dreariest timeslot on the least-crowded night of the week. Literally, it has no competition at all. That is the only reason I watch it. I don't even have a season pass. I just take a look at what's on, find out that there's nothing, and begrudgingly watch this show. The second anything else appears, this one's a goner. I never had anything even resembling high hopes for this one, but with the creative team in mind, I was hopeful that maybe I was wrong. I most certainly was not. It's just so, so bad. The set-up is completely lame, Rachel Bilson, god bless her, is a truly terribly actor, and there's absolutely no narrative drive to speak of. It's basically just a random small town with some stereotypes living there where some meaningless events happen and no one cares. None of the characters are interesting or endearing (particularly Zoe) and the writers just can't seem to get a bead on how to make this show work. The whole fish-out-of-water thing was old before the show even started, but they just keep at it. Dear show, that horse is dead. Worst of all, they use the sets from Gilmore Girls and True Blood. On the one hand, one of the only good things about this show is that you get to remember episodes of far better shows when they walk by Lane's house or have a beer at Merlotte's, but on the other, much bigger hand, it reminds you of shows you'd rather be watching. Sigh. It's hardly worth even mentioning. This show is so insignificant and the writing is so poor that it's truly embarrassing to admit to watching it. The real takeaway lesson learned with this one is that Rachel Bilson is Summer Roberts. That wasn't acting at all. And the day I believe Summer Roberts is a cardiovascular surgeon is the day I officially hand in my professional television watcher membership. If nothing else, I'll know better than to give a show with her as the star a chance. She could maybe work with a true ensemble, but this show has a weak anchor and hardly any supporting players worth mentioning. This one is truly terrible and shows no signs of improving. It may go on for 10 years (you have fun with this pile of shit, CW), but that doesn't make it good.

Awesome Sauce

2011-10-26T15:40:00.002-06:00

October is usually a pretty slow month for me in terms of this blog. After the deluge of shows in September, things cool down considerably in October, right along with the weather. Oh, and there's the small matter of me being worn out and weary from September. The fact that no one actually reads this blog is also a minor factor.

It seems my laziness comes with consequences. Having given Revenge only a good-ish review of the pilot, that's the impression that seems to have stuck with the few out there who read this. Being so very "meh" about life in general led me to neglect my television watching duties and I never got around to mentioning that that show is actually pretty damn delectable. As such, I feel it's necessary to recount the awesomeness of some of my shows, starting with, of course...

REVENGE
My friend at work seemed to take away a rather more negative critique of the pilot than I had intended in my review, but that might just be revisionist history. The pilot wasn't perfect or anything, and it's a night-time soap after all, but I enjoyed it. Based on my new love of the show,
I could very well be misremembering my initial impressions. Whatever the case, this show has gotten good. The first few episodes had a "revenge caper of the week" aspect that gave me pause. Sure it's fun and all to watch Emily eviscerate her foes in creative ways, but I couldn't help but think, "Geez, at a person a week, she better have about 87 people she needs revenge on or this show won't even make it a season..." I had high hopes that the more week-to-week elements would come together at some point, but feared that the writers might be taking the "procedural" to new levels. Much to my delight, not only did everything start to come together last week, but it came together in a nail-biting, awesomely soapy, devious, twisty way. I was initially a little worried about Emily Van Camp's ability to carry a show like this and a character like hers, but she's absolutely wonderful in the role. The whole show is insane, so her cool, calm iciness is a wonderful grounding element and also a lovely foil for the hot-blooded nutjobs all around her. She's been playing the long con for a long time and now it's all coming together... with disastrous results. In last week's episode, elements from all the revenges she'd had so far came together to bite her in the ass and nearly expose the whole gambit. It's a deliciously tense soap opera that I have been sucked into hook, line, and sinker. Because it's a soap, it's wonderfully over the top and outrageous. Will it be winning a ton of Emmys? Probably not (even though many of the actors do a really lovely job). But that doesn't mean it isn't a hell of a lot of fun. The writers have a plan and as a viewer, I can tell. They clearly figured things out before they started filming, unlike so many other shows that just simply spiral out of control. This show is focused and has a season endpoint in mind (as evidenced by the opening sequences of the pilot). Jessica and I just went back and rewatched the the first part of the pilot and it's a hell of a lot more intriguing now that we know who everyone is. If you're watching the show, go online and rewatch the first 10 minutes or so. And if you're not watching, get caught up. It's malevolent fun. In all honesty, it's the only new pilot that I'm this invested in. I'm enjoying Pan Am well enough, Ringer seems to be getting better, Prime Suspect is pretty good... but really, Revenge is the winner so far of the new fall slate. I've only seem one episode of Once Upon a Time though, so stay tuned. Parting thoughts for those of you who watch the show? I can't remember his name on the show, but that friend of Daniel's? Yeah, methinks he's secretly in love with Daniel and that he's not actually wealthy at all. Con artist all the way. I think a con artist knows a con artist when he/she sees one and that's why he and Emily are about to explode. That and, of course, the fact that Emily is dating the man that he loves. Muahahahaha! So good. So soapy. Yes, please.

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES
I know I'm beating a dead horse here, but this show is so freaking fantastic I can barely stand it. For anyone out there still holding onto the always erroneous assumption that this is a Twilight rip off, allow me to once again disabuse you of that notion. TVD is not a cheesy, tacky, predicable tween romance of a show. It's just a kick-ass supernatural show, plain and simple. Okay, so it's not plain and simple at all, really. This show covers an insane amount of ground at a breakneck pace, but somehow, they totally pull it off. It never feels forced or lame. It just feels awesome. And thrilling. And surprising around every corner. And it just keeps getting better. Seriously, the first two seasons were fantastic. The third season is even better. They have brought their A-game in a big way. Even if you think you might know what's about to happen, you don't. Just accept it. You'd think after 50 something episodes of twists and turns that they'd surely have run out of road by now, but no. Best of all, they tie all the storylines and characters and supernatural creatures together in such a way that no one gets left out in the cold and you pretty much have to be invested in everyone and everything because they all affect each other in equal measure. With True Blood, good lord, you could completely forget about half the characters on the show and it wouldn't make a bit of difference. With TVD, even if you think something might be inconsequential, it probably isn't. Last season got a little convoluted toward the end, but pulled itself together. So far in this season? The storytelling is tighter than ever and the Originals are even more awesome than I ever could have expected. Now they just need to pull that effing dagger out of Elijah's chest and thing will really reach a zenith. There have always been characters that I cared about less than the others, but holy hell, nowadays, even Matt is kind of interesting. Truly remarkable. Oh, and the new Elena? Much improved. Speaking of Elena, how insanely hot was that scene between her and Damon in the gym when he was showing her the way to stake a vampire? Holy shit! Those two have some insane chemistry, I tell you what. (It seems the practice they get off screen is doing nothing but good...)

THE GOOD WIFE
You know that dead horse that I was beating with TVD? Well, here's that horse's sister. Also heading into it's third season, The Good Wife is just as delectable as ever. After as insane and explosive as last season was, I'm not sure I can say it's better now than then, but it's at least on par, which is pretty damn fantastic. TGW knows how to write characters and knows how to reinvent people and storylines in a way that always keeps you on your toes. Kind of like TVD, you may think you know where something is headed, but you don't. Even the most seemingly innocuous B-plot totally matters. In this last episode, brilliantly titled "Marthas and Caitlins", Alicia is giving the ostensibly random task of selecting a new employee. She opts for the Martha (and I think we all have an idea in our heads what a "Martha" is like) over Caitlin (again, it's impossible not to have a preconceived notion here), but later finds out that Caitlin is David Lee's niece, who is given the job for that very reason. It might seem like the show is simply highlighting nepotism in the workplace, but they always pull storylines together that affect the characters on a deeper level. As it turns out, this isn't simply a throwaway arc or random instance, Alicia was the "Caitlin" when Will got her the job. Will had to hire Caitlin because David Lee helped him get Alicia over the more qualified "Martha". OUCH. The payoff was brilliant. What's more, I'm hearing rumor that Martha will be back at some point in a big way. Prediction? She and Alicia will be squaring off in the courtroom and Martha will be out for blood. So awesome. Also this last week, we got to see more of the unbelievably satisfying and delightful interactions between Eli and Kalinda (that these two never paired up before is a travesty) and we also got to see Alicia and Cuddy bond (sort of). Drunk Alicia is one of my favorite Alicia's, and even though I'm sure Cuddy has some evil up her sleeve (or was she wearing it on her sleeve?), it's always incredibly refreshing to see people in fiction interacting in a way that isn't juvenile or annoying. Cuddy and Alicia are at odds, but they're adults, and they act like it. Well, most of the time. I know TGW has a reputation out there for being a show for old women (Dear Happy Endings, not only does this show appeal to more than just old women, but it's funnier than your show, even though it's a drama, so maybe you should back off), I've turned a number of people onto this show from a wide range of demographics and they all love it as much as I do. It is, quite simply, the best show on network TV.

Aside from those three, there are some returning favorites that bring me joy (Nikita still kicks ass and Castle always makes me smile), but those three are the real standouts right now. I'll keep you posted.

TV Review: Once Upon a Time

2011-10-24T08:54:00.007-06:00

Going into any high-concept show, you have to measure your expectations. With your typical genre shows (i.e. crime procedurals, sitcoms, lawyer shows, cop shows, medical shows, etc), especially genre shows that air on network TV, you pretty much know exactly what you're going to get from the moment you hear the title of the show. There's only so many different directions The Rememberer can go (fortunately, one of those directions was to the "new title" department... not that Unforgettable is home run or anything). It's easy to strip down a genre show, systematically assess its long-term potential, size it up against its genre cohorts, and summarily dismiss the bad and adopt the good. For the most straight-forward genre pieces, all you really need is the pilot to tell you if it's worth keeping or not. For someone who watches as much TV as I do, it's a vanishingly small number. If you've seen one, you've seen 'em all, and I've seen about 143,000...

With unique, high-concept shows, it's a different story. You never know exactly what you're going to get in the pilot, and even after the pilot, its hard to tell what you're in for in the long-run. While you can instantly break down a crime procedural into story arcs and seasons within about 10 minutes of the pilot, shows that fall outside the tightly defined circle are less predictable, and in my book at least, a welcomed change. A show like Pushing Daisies, Glee, Being Human, or Dollhouse will instantly win itself a lot of points in my book because I haven't seen it before. Unfortunately, that seems to be the same reason that shows like these oftentimes have a hard time finding a substantial audience. For whatever reason, a lot of people out there like to know what to expect. That's totally fine. If you don't want to come home at the end of a long day and have to really dive into a show and pay attention, I totally get it. I have a few of those on my slate as well. More than anything though, I tend to enjoy shows that surprise me and keep me on my toes. Even if its more a matter of structure than story, anything that's fresh and unique gets a lot of leeway from me. When you're making a show that no one's ever seen before, you're writing your own playbook. It's the reason I give Glee as much of a chance as I can, even when it's patently awful. Say what you will about the show, they don't have 615 previous examples of what works and what doesn't to follow. As such, even at their worst (and there's plenty of that to go around), I give them a wide berth and a lot of leniency.

That lengthy preamble sets the stage for my thoughts and views of ABC's new high-concept drama, Once Upon a Time. Based on my appreciation for shows that step out of the box, it should come as little surprise that I quite enjoyed the pilot. That said, as with any unique show, it's going to take some time to assess the long-term potential of the show. Based on the pilot alone, I'm intrigued and excited for as many episodes of this show as the network is willing to give me.

Once Upon a Time is a high-concept show. I define a show as "high concept" when I can't sum it up in six words or less. While I appreciate genre shows for shortening my reviews with such stirring descriptions as "crime procedural with stoic anthropologist" and "medical drama with lots of sex" (generally saving me a whole paragraph), they don't exactly stir the cockles of my heart either. Indeed, I find more often than not that the longer it takes me to describe a show, the more I enjoyed it. Not a hard and fast rule by any stretch, but anecdotal at least. Once Upon a Time is... really hard to describe on paper. In as short as I can possibly muster, the show is a blend of modern-day fairy tale and actual, literary fairy tale. An evil sorceress has cast a spell on all of the beloved fairy tale characters in the land so that they can't remember who they were. They now live is Storybrook, Maine where time stands still and no one knows that they're Snow White, Geppetto, or one of the Seven Dwarves. We're drawn into the story by Emma Swan (played by Jennifer Morrison), the daughter of Prince Charming and Snow White, who was spared from the witch's curse at the last moment, transported from a magical wardrobe to the real world where she grew up a presumed orphan. Now, the son she gave up for adoption 10 years prior (and who was adopted by the evil queen--dun, dun, dun!) has tracked her down and brought her to Storybrook so that she can right the wrongs and save all the characters. I know, it sounds like a horrible mish-mash, but they actually pulled it off pretty well. The Emma Swan angle didn't quite captivate me as much as the magical kingdom angle, getting a bit sluggish here and there versus the sparkle of Snow White and Prince Charming, but for this kind of a pilot, I'm pretty forgiving. It must have been hell trying to figure out how to present this set-up in a way that worked.

The show is a blending of the modern context with Emma Swan and the fairy tale context, set before the evil queen cast the spell. From what I can tell and conjecture from the pilot and scenes from next episode, this is the motif the show will employ for the long-run, using the fairy tale timeline to elucidate the backgrounds for all of these characters and the "now now" timeline to tell Emma's story to save the kingdom, essentially. As mentioned, this is new territory in a lot of ways, so it's hard to tell exactly where we're going from here. I, for one, am thrilled at the promise of making no promises. This show has the liberty do whatever it likes, essentially, and while I can't be sure it'll succeed over the course of several seasons, I'm excited to see it regardless.

It sounds completely ridiculous on paper, I grant that, but that's one of the things I liked the best about it. It's a bizarre conceit, one that I've never seen before, and they actually pull it off. I wouldn't say the pilot was perfect and I'm not entirely sure how everything works, but I got swept away. I can see where a lot of viewers would find it completely cheesy and lame, but I have a soft spot for fairy tales and fantasy, so it hit home with me in a big way. The writers and producers embraced the crazy and ran with it, seemingly deciding that if they were going to fail, they were going to fail big. Fortunately, Once Upon a Time was not a fail. The blending of timelines and the overlap of characters was effortless and clearly spelled out. There's little room for confusion, although I can see where some of the ways in which they define their universe might get muddled down the line. Like I said, I'm not sure how everything works exactly or who knows what or why, but I'm confident I'll find out and that the writers will present these answers in a way that follows the rules they choose define. Most high-concept shows end up changing the rules as time goes by, but I'm largely fine with it. So long as the changes themselves make logical sense (relative to the show's surroundings), I'm more than happy to allow the writers to take as many liberties as they wish.

Other viewers might not be so forgiving or willing to learn a whole new set of universe vocabulary. Which is fine. This is not a show for everyone. What I found magical, others may find hokey. I'm hoping the more traditional viewer will give the show a chance, however, because even if fairy tales aren't your bag, there's a lot to enjoy about this show. The cast is wonderful and neither takes themselves too seriously nor writes this gig off as a flight of fancy. The writing and acting makes for a nice balance of modernity and fantasy. When I first saw the trailer for this one, I was a little afraid that it might get carried away with itself (and not in a good way), but to my delight, it paints a picture that's both grounded and whimsical at the same time. The transitions between the here and now never felt jarring or forced and I found myself genuinely invested in both.

What really helps to sell the concept is the production values. In essence, the show has the money to make this work. I'm not saying a show needs a high budget to make fantasy work (indeed, most of my favorite fantasy was made on a shoestring), but for a network show with this kind of concept, a few extra dollars certainly doesn't hurt. I'd more than likely be on board regardless, but to draw in the errant viewer, a heavy dose of "oooohs" and "awwws" goes a long way. Borrowing visual aesthetics based in fairy tale and Disneyland, this high concept is presented in a warm, visually stimulating, but familiar way. It actually kind of had an Enchanted vibe to it with mix of new and old, reality and fantasy, which I quite enjoyed. Even the best visual effects and set designs won't save you if the writing is bad, however, so they're lucky they've got capable writers and charming actors en tow. "If you care about the characters, nothing else matters. If you don't care about the characters, nothing else matters." Words to live and die by, in the television industry. In only a pilot, it's hard to really form connections with characters right off the bat, so the "else" matters a lot more. When Ringer Buffy's greenscreened boating expedition is the only thing you can remember, you're in trouble...

All in all, I rather enjoyed the pilot, although not without reservations. I'm not sure I found the modern storyline as captivating as the fairy tale background, but I'm willing to wager that will even out over time. I think that may be because I don't know the modern characters as well as their fairy tale counterparts. Even though this was only the pilot, I know who Snow White is and what the Seven Dwarves are all about, Rumpelstiltskin's true character, and how Jiminy Cricket rolls. It was easy to care about these characters because I already do. Emma Swan and her son don't have that kind of background with me. That said, I think Jennifer Morrison did a lovely job and I honestly didn't hate the kid (which is big for me). I'm not sure I found the whole show quite as enchanting as I would have liked, but it was enchanting enough. At the very least, I'm excited for more and I was even a little bummed when the pilot ended. I want to see what happens next. That's about all a pilot can ever ask of its audience.

Will this work for a whole season? Or several seasons? I haven't the faintest idea. Am I really, really hoping that it does? Yes, absolutely. I think this show may have a hard time finding a sizable enough audience to justify its budget, but a girl can dream, right? According to the show at least, that's a big yes. I may be more attuned to this kind of concept than a lot of people, but I think even the casual passerby could find a lot to love about this show. It's familiar and unique at the same time, which is a tall order to fill. Unlike a lot of fairy tale reimaginations (like Wicked), this show doesn't seem so much bent on reinventing who these characters really were so much as putting these characters in a whole new context. In most ways, who these characters are are who we've always thought they were. That makes the show accessible to even those who might pooh-pooh a higher concept show in general. I certainly hope so.

Pilot Grade: B+

Fall Ratings: Should you be worried?

2011-10-13T09:29:00.004-06:00

I wasn't sure how to structure this post and the next one... I wanted to do a post which looked at the ratings for shows (assessing survival prospects) and I wanted to do one with the shows that I'm keeping and the ones I'm kicking to the curb. I was determined to make these two separate posts, but they kept overlapping. I'll separate as best I can, but bear with me, there may be some redundancy...

Please also note that there will likely be some shows left off this list. I'll mostly focus on new shows, but there might be some returning favorites as well.

For credentials sake, you should know that I follow show ratings week-to-week, keep a going list of ratings for all new shows and for returning shows who might be in trouble. I've been doing this long enough that I have a pretty good sense for what kind of ratings a show needs to survive, adjusting for network, timeslot, financial investment, and any number of other factors. It's kind of pitiful how well-versed I am in this.

Anyway, on with the shows!

**EXTREMELY SAFE ZONE**
(SHOWS THAT HAVE ALREADY BEEN PICKED UP FOR A FULL SEASON):

NEW GIRL
I can't say I'm over the moon about this show, but it's ratings are impossible to argue with. I had a feeling the show would do well, but holy shit. Apparently there are even more doe-eyed Zooey lovers out there than I thought! Not only were the key demo numbers impressive by even Fox's standards, but it routinely outpaces Glee. Not only does this speak to New Girl's success, but it also speaks to Glee's precipitous fall. Don't get me wrong, Glee's demo numbers are still more than solid, but I'm sure the execs at Fox were shocked. Even with the baseball-induced hiatus, this show should do just fine in the long run.
UP ALL NIGHT
This pick-up has more to do with NBC's pathetic-ness than with the ratings. The numbers have been good by NBC standards, but if this show were on CBS, it wouldn't have made it past the second week.
2 BROKE GIRLS
This one is just depressing. This show is awful, but it's ratings are insanely high. Even by CBS standards, which are ridiculously higher than NBC's.
RINGER
Only on the CW, folks. The ratings are bad, really bad, but when you're on the CW, it doesn't matter so much. I've been trying to give this show another chance, having heard it got a lot better, but only time will tell. I would have said that this pick-up had more to do with SMG's high profile than anything else, but that was until...
HART OF DIXIE
Yeah, this was a surprise, even for the CW. This show's ratings are only a tick above Nikita's (which airs in the worst time slot ever conceived). Even by CW standards, I didn't think they'd keep this one. At the very least, I thought they'd give it another week of numbers before they made a decision. I wouldn't care, but the more shows the CW picks up, the more in danger Nikita is. Or, I guess looking at it another way, if they're willing to keep this, they're willing to keep anything.
THE SECRET CIRCLE
No brainer. It's ratings aren't great by most broadcasting standards, but they're better than 90% of the CW's slate. It's no TVD, but it's hanging in there.
WHITNEY
Given NBC's "barely above the CW" standards, I can't say this was a total surprise, but the speed with which it came was a bit of a shock. After two weeks of ratings freefall, they give it a full-season order? I don't know what is being smoked over at NBC, but this show is terrible and its ratings are only getting worse. But, now they're stuck with it. Smart.

Now that we've moved past the shows that have already gotten the definitive green light, we're headed into more speculative territory. Please bear in mind that it's still early on, so these predictions are just that. Predictions. Anything can happen, folks. Based on ratings and everything else, here's how the new shows (and some old shows) are doing. To be honest with you, most shows that haven't been picked-up already are at least sort of in trouble, but here goes...

**SAFE ZONE**
(SHOWS WITH GOOD NUMBERS, BUT HAVEN'T BEEN PICKED-UP FOR A FULL SEASON (OR ANOTHER SEASON) YET):

SUBURGATORY
It's only aired a couple of episodes so far, but the numbers are solid. If it stays on trend, it will certainly get a full-season pick-up. [UPDATE: With last night's ratings totals in, this show is a lock for a full-season. Announcement should come any day.]
TERRA NOVA
Okay, to say this show is "safe" is a bit of a misnomer. It's numbers aren't what Fox had hoped for, but it's initial order was for 13 episodes. When speaking in those terms, in spite of the ratings, I'm willing to wager it will air all 13 episodes. That said, while the numbers for its first two episodes were good and showed no signs of slipping, there was a pretty big drop off for episode 3. If that continues, even the small order won't save it.
PARENTHOOD
Yeah, yeah, it's not a new show, but it's perennially on the bubble, so I thought you fans would want to know that it's going to be just fine. No, it's numbers aren't great, but they're decent by NBC standards, and more importantly, they're consistent week to week. In short, it's doing fine.
THE GOOD WIFE
On any other network, it's numbers would be stellar, but for CBS, they key demo ratings are disappointing. Why is it safe then, you ask? Because it's the best show on network TV, the only network drama that receives any kind of critical or awards acclaim at all, and because CBS likes to have bragging rights. What's more, CBS is so insanely successful that it can afford to have a critical darling under its wing. The numbers have been fairly low for CBS, but they've been consistent, even in spite of the new timeslot. No worries, Eli and Kalinda aren't going anywhere.
REVENGE
I think the ratings have finally settled and they're in a range that ABC can definitely get behind. ABC is almost as pitiful as NBC and it can't be too choosy, so to have a show genuinely do well is a no-brainer. Revenge can even stand to go a little lower and still be just fine. [UPDATE: With last night's ratings totals in, this show is a lock for a full-season. Announcement should come any day.]
LAST MAN STANDING
Okay, so it's only aired one episode, but they numbers were very, very good for ABC. The show, unfortunately, is very, very bad in every conceivable regard, but when has that ever stopped anybody? I'm hoping for a shocking drop-off next week, but I doubt it. Even if it's numbers were cut in half, it would probably be fine. I'll pause while everyone goes and weeps for humanity.
HAPPY ENDINGS
I'm as shocked as you are. After getting a miraculous pick-up after last season, something rivaling Biblical times, this show is back and is actually doing pretty well. It looks like in the shuffle of things, Happy Endings has come out on top (well, middle really, but you know what I mean).
CASTLE
Numbers could be better, but ABC is fully invested in this one. It's not going anywhere. Even if Nathan Fillion's track record would suggest otherwise.
GLEE
A lot of people have been wondering about Glee's ratings after the disaster that was season 2, so I'm including it on the list. For the record, the numbers have been noticeably lower and have been sliding a bit week-to-week. That said, it's key demos are still among the highest in the biz and the show isn't going anywhere. It has actually been better this year, but that doesn't seem to be enough to bring back all the folks who broke up with it after last season. Can't says I blame you.

**DANGER ZONE**
(SHOWS THAT ARE DOWN, BUT NOT OUT... YET):

PAN AM
This show started off flying high in the ratings and looked to be ABC's saving grace from the loss of Desperate Housewives, but it's numbers have been in freefall since the premiere. It's a shame, because I'm really enjoying this one, but if its numbers go any lower, it's going to be in serious trouble. I think the only thing that will save it is ABC's need to save face and their growing acceptance as being "barely better than NBC"...
NIKITA
Oh, my darling Nikita. This show has always struggled a bit even by CW standards, but now that it's stranded in the worst timeslot ever, I'm worried. Anchoring Friday nights? Yikes. I'm sure the CW had low expectations, but still. It's numbers honestly aren't that much worse than the rest of the CW's slate, but with Chuck starting up in a couple of weeks, I'm worried that Nikita's numbers will sink even lower. I think the show's saving grace will be that this is the kind of show that does well abroad and may make money for the network in the long run. Fingers crossed!
PRIME SUSPECT
The numbers aren't good, at all really, but they're holding steady and NBC is desperate. They just ordered 6 more scripts, so that bodes well for the show, even if not for NBC as a whole. I'm actually enjoying this one to an extent, so I'm happy to see it'll be around for a while.
HARRY'S LAW
This one is the real head-scratcher. Based on key demo ratings, this show would almost be at home on the CW, garnering worse numbers than The Vampire Diaries (although it does do okay in total numbers). NBC just ordered 6 more scripts, but I think it was a bad call. I have a feeling NBC sees this as their The Good Wife, hoping it'll bring some reputability to the network. Sorry NBC, it will not.
UNFORGETTABLE
CBS loves its crime procedurals, but viewers aren't exactly flocking to this piece of shit, and they know it. It's numbers have been going steadily down and even if it stays where it is, it's going to have a hard time. It may get a full season, but I'd be shocked if it got a second year. I guess watching Poppy Montgomery stare off into space just isn't as riveting as CBS hoped it would be... Note to Poppy, save the money you spend on lip injections and spend it on a dialect coach.
PERSON OF INTEREST
Its future looks rosier than Unforgettable's, but only by a bit. The numbers are okay for now, but they've been going steadily down. It's an expensive show to produce, but it has an impressive pedigree. If it can stay were it is, I think it'll be fine. If it goes much lower, it'll be in trouble. I think it's going to come down to one or the other and this will get picked up and Unforgettable will get the axe.

**DEAD ZONE**
(SHOWS THAT SHOULD PROBABLY REVIEW THEIR WILLS):

CHARLIE'S ANGELS
Not long for this world, peeps. I'm guessing it'll be the next to get cancelled. Terrible show, terrible ratings. I'm kind of surprised it hasn't already bitten the big one.
A GIFTED MAN
Even with a Friday timeslot, there's no saving this one. CBS will likely give it the axe the moment it has something to fill the timeslot with, if not sooner.
FRINGE
Again, Friday can only forgive so much. Fox seems to be behind this one though, so I guess a miracle could happen. In my heart of hearts, I suspect this will be its last season, but I'm guessing it'll be a full season.

**EXTREMELY DEAD ZONE**
(SHOWS THAT HAVE ALREADY BEEN CANCELED):

THE PLAYBOY CLUB
This one never stood a chance, and it has nothing to do with the PTC. If anything, the right wing uproar is the only thing that brought in any ratings at all. This show just couldn't work on network TV. The leads were lackluster for the most part and the writing was sloppy.
FREE AGENTS
Even though the ratings sucked, I thought this one would last a little longer by simple virtue of being a half-hour comedy... I was wrong. Go forth, Giles, onto better gigs.
HOW TO BE A GENTLEMAN
Hats off to CBS for pulling the plug on this piece of shit after only one episode. On any other network, the ratings would have been cause for celebration, but CBS has a higher threshold and the luxury of axing anything it chooses.
H8R
I never saw a single episode... and neither did anyone else. You get canceled by the CW, you know you've got problems. The CW doesn't do a whole lot right, but getting rid of this horrendous assault on television was one of the best moves in recent history.

"It's over. We're safe. I won."

2011-10-11T13:49:00.005-06:00

If you haven't watched Breaking Bad yet, you need to start. For all the people out there who think television is a pulp medium and a vacuous waste of time, take notice. I'm not saying there isn't a truly depressing amount of total shit on the airwaves right now (the E! network relies on such shows to feed their families), but if you sift through all the awful, there are some absolute gems. Right now? None rises higher on my list than Breaking Bad, which, after completing four seasons, is better than ever.

This show keeps you on your toes, even when you don't realize your on them. It's like when you've been tensing a muscle for so long that you forget about it until the tension releases. With Breaking Bad, the knots grow tighter and the water gets hotter so gradually that by the time you reach the end of the season, every single moment, no matter how seemingly calm or staid, is a blood pressure spiking nail-biter. I think the best part of the show is the many and varied and surprising ways in which it builds the tension.

**SPOILER ALERT**
If you haven't seen the entire series to date, do not read the rest of this post. Trust me, you don't want to ruin it.

Each season examines Walt's and Jesse's descent step by step, but with each new season comes a new focus, a new perspective that narrows the magnifying glass on a new facet of the hell they've created for themselves. When trying to sum of the "theme" of sorts of this season, it was hard for me to boil down. My first thought was, "Well, it's all about seeming compromise and concurrently, a total lack of any compromise at all--the goal is to use the notion of compromise to one-up everyone around you." I think AV Club summed up that murky notion of conflicting agendas well with a single word: negotiation. Throughout the season, each and every character has to negotiate with the people around them, the forces acting upon them, their own moral compasses, the factors that are out of their control, and even more perilously I think, the factors that are within their control. When it boils down, this show has always been about control and it uses each of its characters to maximum effect in driving home what control actually means and how it creates and destroys.

One of the most powerful aspects of the show is that the characters are allowed to change over time, with the balance of power shifting almost seamlessly beneath their feet. This season saw so many terrifying voltas that my loyalties would almost sneak up on me. Seriously, from one episode to another, the game can change so entirely that I the viewer could barely keep up with who I wanted to succeed, let alone the players on the board. As the characters were negotiating their own existences, I was negotiating my allegiances. "Wait a minute, am I really pulling for Gus Fring all of a sudden? When did that happen?" It's the hallmark of an amazing show when each character is so layered that he or she is both beloved and loathed at any given time. Breaking Bad has such characters in spades. By the end of this season, I found myself hoping Walt, the shows seeming protagonist, would get the worst of it, and somehow ended up hoping Gus Fring, so feared and hated just a few episodes back, would rise the victor. My emotions were entirely fluid though, and these fleeting acknowledgments would flit in and out of my conscience almost the moment they were acknowledged. When I tried to reconcile how my desperate hope that Walt would go undetected had morphed into a begrudging tolerance of his existence, and how, conversely, my fear and loathing of Gus Fring had somehow transformed into a sort of respect, I found myself ending up at the same place. Jesse.

When I watch Breaking Bad, I see the world through Jesse's eyes and view the succeeding events in terms of how they affect Jesse specifically. For me, he's the heart and soul of the show. Over the past four years, the writers have done an amazing job of formulating two characters who aren't what they seem. When the show began, we had a desperate, dying, reluctant chemistry teacher who got caught up cooking meth with a low-life addict. As the show as gone on, however, it has become more and more painfully and terrifyingly apparent that while both of these characters have gotten in over their heads, Walt is at home here, Jesse isn't. In the panoply of dark, crazy shit that goes down on this show, Walt emerges as the character who drives the risk higher and higher, even when it's unnecessary. He feels alive doing bad, bad things, probably for the first time in his life, and he'll tighten the noose around his own neck if it means he gets to be the big, bad, powerful Heisenberg rather than the weak, ineffectual, insignificant Mr. White. While that progression is thrilling and terrible to watch, it puts a certain bent on his character that makes him the bully, the bad guy, the architect of destruction that's hard to pull for. Jesse, by sharp contrast, never really wanted any of this at all. Where Walt exerts control (even when he only thinks it's his to exert), Jesse seems eternally subject to the forces around him. Sure, his behaviors are self-destructive most of the time and his decisions affect his well-being in a direct way, but when it comes to Jesse, there just doesn't seem to be much of any control at all. Even at his most powerful, it seems he's being manipulated by the alpha males around him. I think that's where the turn came for me between the two father figures in his life. I pull for whoever treats Jesse the best because Jesse has no power to control his own destiny. In my negotiation with my own loyalties, Jesse's best interests always prevail.

Playing Jesse as the heart of the show, the lost boy, the son, comes to into deadly focus in the finale when it's impossible to fully comprehend in just how many ways he's being manipulated by his fathers. The more caring and fatherly Gus became, the more suspicious I became, but by that same token, the more confident and assured Jesse became. I found myself slipping into Gus' web in much the same way Jesse did. When Jesse found a shelf full of blood bags intended for him in Mexico (preparations to save his life), it was like he felt truly valued and cared for for the first time in his life. After several episodes of watching Jesse spiral completely into the abyss, seeing anyone, even Gus Fring, pull him back from the edge was endearing. In the back of my mind, I always felt that Fring was manipulating Jesse is some grand way, but it was hard to argue with the day-to-day improvement in Jesse's well-being (even if, when being totally honest, I think Mike had a lot more to do with Jesse's rehabilitation than Gus ever did). At the end of the day, while Walt and Gus were hurtling toward each other on the evil expressway, Jesse pretty much just needed a hug most of the time. Indeed, even when Jesse is at his most badass, he's one small step from being completely horrified by the people around him. Seeing the absolute panic on his face when the Mexican cartel started collapsing and Mike garotted that one guy served as a potent reminder that in spite of all this, Jesse is a sensitive kid who's mixed up in a whirlwind he can't get out of. It should be noted, however, that in spite of Jesse's innate constitution, he's in the thick of things, he knows it, and he does his best with it. Both he and Walt have murdered people at this point, they've both done a lot of things to hurt the people around them, and they've both gone against the other at times. The big difference in my eyes is that Jesse has an innate goodness and Walt... well, who knows what's at his core these days, but I don't think anyone would characterize it as "good." When Heisenberg kills someone, it's in his own self-interest. When Jesse kills someone, it's for the sake of others.

Walt and Gus are more alike than Walt would ever like to admit and more than Jesse will probably ever know. That's how Walt used Jesse to such a spectacularly bloody end. We, the audience, know more than Jesse does about Walt and that leads our negotiations to other ends. Jesse has this almost childlike view of the world. His morals are black and white in theory, but he's so impressionable and susceptible to outside influences that it takes a real shot across the bow to bring his resolve to the surface. From early on in the show, we've known how much Jesse cares for children. Nothing brings out his rage or wrath like acts against kids. We know this, Walt knows this, and Jesse suffers for it. Walt, that soul-sucking, game-playing bastard, knew full well that the way to get Jesse to turn of Gus would be to exploit Jesse's love of children. Jesse would never kill someone who had wronged him solely. Jesse has had the crap kicked out of him in every way possible for years. If he killed the people who had wronged him, no one would be left. No, Jesse acts out when people even more helpless than he is get hurt. He's all to aware of what it's like to be the victim in this way. He's the little guy, but not the littlest guy, and watching the helpless get screwed is more than Jesse can bear. Walt knows this. When Jesse had the gun to Walt's head and was (as it turns out, quite rightly) accusing him of poisoning the boy, Walt plays on Jesse's goodness and convinces him that he isn't capable of hurting a child. "Do you really think I could do that?!" As an audience member, who watched him actively let Jane die a couple of seasons back, the answer is a resounding, "Yes." Having seen the entirety of Walt's digression in vivid technicolor, there isn't anything I wouldn't put past him at this point. Jesse doesn't know this, however. What he does know, is that Gus is someone who hurts kids. In Jesse's black and white logic, it must be Gus. At this point, I honestly wasn't sure who had poisoned the boy. While in the back of my mind, I didn't want to believe Walt had done it, his moral compass points any which way but north these days, so he had to be a possibility. On the other hand, I couldn't see how Walt had access to the Ricin. Also, when Gus takes a stab at someone, it cuts to the core, so he was just as likely a suspect. Geez, I feel like I'm picking Iocaine here and I clearly can't choose the baddie in front of me.

In the closing scenes, when it's revealed that it was actually berries from Lily of the Valley that poisoned the boy, my theoretical mind splintered. I still thought Walt was a fair candidate, but I also know that the writers are just ballsy enough to have the poisoning have nothing to do with anything. While the reveal that it really was Walt made for a searing WTF moment, in a weird way, I think it almost would have hit harder if the boy's illness really had been an accident. When you're in the middle of a shitstorm, you can't see accidents for what they are and that has deadly consequences. In the end though, I was absolutely thrilled by the closing shot of the pot of flowers in Walt's yard. Some critics have felt it was a little too explicit, I appreciated having definitive proof. This show leaves a lot of things up in the air, makes the waters murkier and murkier with each successive episode, and shifts the balance of power often enough that it was nice to have something more grounded, more, well, explicit. It lacked some the nuance of the show's greatest moments, but it hit hard and worked extremely well. Had they not been so explicit, viewers would have been left with some thrilling uncertainty, but that would have sapped some of the mega impact of learning that yes, Walt is willing to kill children if it accomplishes his own ends. If it, in effect, helps him "win." The best part of it all was that it called back to Walt sitting in the backyard earlier, spinning the gun. I can usually see a plot point telegraphed from a mile away, but with Breaking Bad, I oftentimes read it wrong. When he was spinning the gun, and it pointed at him twice, and then at "nothing" the third time, I thought that was telling Walt that there was only him left. Little did I know that it was actually pointing to that potted plant-- that seemingly innocuous, random set dressing. Masterfully done, show.

There are a million other things to talk about with this show, the final story arcs, and the finale itself, but this is getting interminably long and difficult to organize. Here are my other random thoughts on the closing episodes of this season:

We may have gotten closure on whether or not Walt poisoned the boy, but there's still a lot up in the air. Did Ted actually die? What's going to happen with that? Where does Gus' empire go from here? Does Jesse suspect Walt after all? Does he really believe it was an accident? Will he ever learn the truth? And so on...
For as many times as my loyalties shifted from character to character, I could never bring myself to root for Hank. I know I'm in the minority here, and I honestly can't put my finger on why, but I've hated his character since minute one and haven't been concerned for his well-being or reputation for even a second. Most people wanted his theories to be proven and vindication to be had. I kept hoping he'd throw a clot and die. Even at his most awesome, he's the last person I'd want to spend a day with. I think the final straw for me came with how he treated Marie after he was injured. Ugh. I can see the reasons behind it, but that doesn't make me love him anymore. The problem with Hank is that I get the feeling I'm supposed to love him, but I don't.
Skylar, Skylar, Skylar. I love her, I hate her. It was when I realized that I was supposed to kind of hate her that I started to appreciate what she brings to the show. Most recently, her bid to save herself by pretending to be Ted's dingbatty accountant was pure gold. "Do you use Quicken? That program is amazing. It's like there's a calculator in the computer." Awesome. She has her issues to be sure, but she has some true moments of badass in her own right. I wish Anna Gunn had laid off the plastic surgery/botox though. Skylar was downright difficult to look at this season.
Best. Death scene. Ever. It may have strayed from the gritty reality of the show's core and aesthetic, but when you're as supremely awesome as Gus Fring, you deserve better than a conventional death. Calm, cool, composed, and well-dressed, even when half his face has been blown off. Badass in every regard. I'm sad to see him go.
I've very glad to see that Mike was conveniently recovering in Mexico for all of this though. Mike is probably my favorite character on the show and the only true father figure among them. I can't wait to see what they do with him in season 5--which had better come soon, dammit!
Speaking of people I can't wait to see again, Saul Goodman is fantastic. It's not easy to inject a believable amount of levity to a show like this, but Saul cracks me up at every turn. I'm so glad he survived the finale and I'm really hoping we get to me his guy who can disappear you if you order the right vacuum part.
I love Jesse so much. And I have a ridiculous crush of Aaron Paul, who is just so unbelievably talented. Even when he knows damn well that telling the doctors about the Ricin possibility will likely land him in jail, he doesn't hesitate for even a moment. He runs into the hospital to make sure the boy is okay. Walt, even if he hadn't poisoned him himself, would have stood in the parking lot weighing the pros and cons and ultimately deciding that it wasn't in his own best interest to save the boy. He would have watched him die to save himself. As always.
Hats off to the show, the writers, the producers, the directors, and the entire cast and crew. All the actors do such a fabulous job that there's no point in singling people out (although Aaron Paul breaks my heart, Bryan Cranston pisses me off, and Giancarlo Esposito scares the hell out of me). That said, the man who played Tio Salamanca gets extra points for being just as amazing as everyone else without saying a single word. Truly inspired. You know you have an amazing show when the death of two of the shows super-villains isn't met with a cheer. He and Gus will be sorely missed.

TV Review: Terra Nova

2011-09-27T10:51:00.002-06:00

I became apprehensive about Fox's new big budget dino-rama Terra Nova when I heard that they were aiming to appeal to everyone, young and old, male and female, etc. In my experience, when a show tries to please everyone, it doesn't please me. I'm sure that most viewers were more than happy with this sci-fi fantasy spectacle, but for a show about time travel and dinosaurs, I was surprisingly bored. For the entire two hours. Which felt like about... oh, let's say... 85 million years.

The short short version of this review? I spent the whole time wishing the main characters would get eaten by dinosaurs.

Okay, it wasn't a total disaster or anything, but if I'm being totally honest, I kept whinily asking the show to be over as I checked the time code on my DVR to see how much show was left. I didn't go into this one expecting to absolutely love every minute or anything, but I expected at least not to be bored. Literally, at one point two of the main characters are speeding away from a dinosaur that's trying to kill them and all I could think was, "I wonder if there are any brownies left in the kitchen... I should go check." I'm guessing I'm in the minority here when it comes to this pilot (and based on most reviews I've stumbled across, I'm mostly right), but I was underwhelmed pretty much from minute one.

Terra Nova stars Jason O'Mara as Jim Shannon, a cop living in 2149 which is a post-industrial, polluted hell hole where the air is unbreathable without a "re-breather" to assist, people are packed into crumbling cities, resources have been almost completely depleted, and population control is necessarily enforced with military precision. I knew the show was in trouble the second O'Mara got home to his family (a wife and three kids (which is one too many from a legal standpoint)) with an orange en tow. I think it must be required for all futuristic wasteland scenarios that fresh fruit be dragged out as some sort of emblem of how bad things have gotten. "Oooh, an orange?! I haven't seen one of these in years! Where did you get it?!" Ugh. Never seen that scene before. Don't get me wrong, some truly spectacular sci-fi shows have employed this hackneyed ploy, but when Firefly does it, you get a compelling piece of backstory about soldiers blowing each other up by placing charges inside apples. It was also very story specific, rather than simply being a heavy-handed illustration of the environmental state of the planet. With Terra Nova, it merely marked the first in a long long of sci-fi cliches that were borrowed from more successful predecessors.

Upon finding the Shannon family's third child hiding in a vent (stupid kid couldn't keep her mouth shut for 2 little minutes), papa Shannon gets thrown in jail for assaulting one of the officers. Two years later, his wife gets called up to go back in time 85 million years on the Terra Nova project (she's very conveniently a doctor), whereby waves of citizens from 2149 will start a new timeline of human events. Basically, humanity will be allotted 85 million extra years to destroy the joint. Yay? Good for us? After a series of highly illegal events, the whole Shannon clan, Jim and illegal extra daughter included, make their way back to Terra Nova. From there, the highly predictable chain of sci-fi cliches and "back in time" tropes fall into place one by one. I kept hoping this show would bring something truly new and unique to the genre, but more than anything, it just tried to jam-pack as many other genres on top of this one that it could, borrowing even more cliches from around the narrative world. In its attempt to craft a show for everyone, it appropriated a fairly cheesy family drama (a sub-par version of Everwood sprang to mind), excerpts from The O.C. and Melrose Place as the hot young singles in the colony (including an obvious love interest for mopey teenage son of the Shannons) go jump off a waterfall (yeah, I called that one from a mile away), healthy dollops of Lost (the "Others" are called "Sixers" these days), the sci-fi militarism we've come to know and expect from this kind of project, a ridiculous number of set-ups for young love, more than a little Avatar thrown in, and Jurassic Park style everything else. It was all very impressive to look at, but it all felt extremely familiar. Honestly, that hardly covers the pantheon of predictable plotlines, but I got bored just recounting those ones. It all made for a disappointingly clunky debut to a show that should have blown me away, not annoyed me.

For a show that's focused, has a clear identity and purpose, and whose writing team has solidified what it wants out of the show in advance, familiar tropes and storylines can easily and successfully be littered throughout. Firefly, for example, was a sci-fi western, complete with all the trappings, but was also a post-war battle between the allies and rebels, any number of love stories, a mystery, a family drama, and just about everything else. Firefly presented all these aspects in a seemingly effortless way that simply felt organic to the characters and the setting. With Terra Nova, I kept getting the feeling that there were just too many cooks in the kitchen with each wanting a certain aspect thrown in wherever it happened to fit in a shameless bid to appeal to as wide an audience as possible. Knowing the American viewing public as I do, I'm sure a lot of people were more than happy with this show because indeed, it casts a wide net. Had I not seen so many other shows from similar genres, I probably would have been far more forgiving, but for me, this massively big budget, show-stopping production felt derivative, not innovative or original.

The pilot buzzed through a hell of a lot of backstory and exposition in its two-hour debut, establishing a huge cast, a fair bit of mythology, the often saccharine and disingenuous inter-dynamics of the characters, and the scientific underpinnings of what they're doing and how. It's that last one that was probably the most unnatural for them to convey. In order for the viewers to be informed about the "science" behind it all right off the bat, eldest son Josh has to carry the idiot ball for the better part of the episode, having things explained to him by his brainy younger sister left and right. Not only would anyone in this situation know the basics of what they're doing and how, but it would have been a lot more interesting for me as a viewer to leave some of it unclear. I don't need everything explained to me right out of the gate. I'm sure I'm in the minority once again, but I'd much rather be simply immersed in a world and have details about the mechanics relayed over time, letting them become clear naturally as I slowly learn more about the world around me. Instead of letting me wonder about the Butterfly Effect of it all, muse about the effects it will all have on the future, try to figure out how they got there, etc, I was instead forced to listen to an annoyingly stereotypical character offer a lesson to her siblings in the least natural way possible. But then again, in any family dynamic, we need to the brooding, moody rebel older son and the brainy, awkward younger sister, dontcha know. Ugh. All the plot exposition became oppressive, annoying, and largely unnecessary as the show went on. We've all seen this kind of show before, people. We don't need this. Indeed, the Butterfly Effect should have been the most interesting part of the show, with the past altering the future in unexpected ways, but this rules that out immediately, indicating that Terra Nova exists in a "different time stream" or something and therefore has no effect on the future. While I can understand where the writers wouldn't want to deal with all that (*cough* Lost *cough*), I think it would have made for a much more interesting storyline. The show could have created a dynamic whereby the colonists had no way of knowing what impact they were having on the future, which would have led to any number of moral and ethical considerations that would have been interesting to watch. As is, it kind of felt like the easy way out. A cop-out.

I think if the basic set up had been more captivating the narrative elements would have been stronger over all. To be honest, I was more interested in the hellish future than in the dinosaur-laden past. I expected the time-travelers to be establishing a new colony in the past, figuring out how to survive and determining if this gambit will actually save mankind or not. That was not the case. Rather, the Shannon family travels back in time to a colony begun several years earlier and which has huge, detached houses for each family, a well-defined compound, and residents who basically grew up there. I should have been pleasantly surprised by this one and only surprise on the show, but instead, it just seemed to limit the writers on what they could do. By the end of the pilot, it was clearly evident why the colony had to be well-established for the story they were telling (and to avoid even more Lost comparisons), but all in all, I think I would have rather watched the show I expected because the show I got was kinda dull.

The show honestly has pretty decent bones to work with, it just didn't work with them very well. I think it's the kind of show that could be really good, but that the pilot wasn't very good. This clunky hodge-podge of stories and characters didn't take full advantage of the assets at its disposal. Hopefully they will in the future... Easily the most interesting aspect of the show was the "Others" who are comprised of a group of colonist who all came back with the sixth wave (which is why they're called "Sixers" now). They broke off and formed their own colony which is now at odds with Terra Nova. They've been posited as the bad guys (or at least the opposition) of the show, but I found myself wishing I were on their journey instead of the one I was on. In spite of the constant Hallmark Family Movie moments between the Shannons, I so didn't care about that family at all. I salute the writers for trying to endear them to viewers in a substantive way, but they were all so stereotypical that it was impossible for me to jump on board or get attached. They all just seemed like 2-dimensional cardboard cutouts that I just wanted to see get eaten by dinosaurs. The Sixers were far more interesting and for the sake of my enjoyment of the show, I hope to hell they have a more prominent role in episodes to come. I think they struck me as the most interesting because their origins and motives were left unsaid, allowing me to speculate and theorize to my heart's content. Had I been forced to listen to clunky plot exposition in that regard, I'd probably be as disillusioned with them as with the main guys, hoping both bloody colonies get eaten by dinosaurs. Fortunately though, they left some room to grow in this regard and I'm genuinely intrigued. Added to that, Captain Taylor (the main guy leading Terra Nova) has a son that went missing years back who, I like to think, has something to do with the Sixers, but we don't know what. What we do know is that he's most likely the one behind a number of mathematical inscriptions on some stones by the falls that look like they were left a confoundingly long time ago. My hope is that Taylor's son is some sort of a genius who devised a way to manipulate time by himself and went even further back and left the inscriptions. Between Taylor's son and the Sixers, I was rather entertained amid the other blander aspects of the pilot. Hell, they were a lot more captivating than the Shannon family and even the dinosaurs.

Speaking of the dinosaurs, I did not love the CGI. At times, the dinosaurs looked really good, but more often than not, it was pretty apparent that managing the level of special effects necessary to be convincing on a television budget was a pipe dream. This was an obscenely expensive television pilot and I still wasn't buying the dinosaurs half the time. Man alive, I can only imagine what they'll look like week-to-week with only one fifth the budget to rely on. Prepare yourselves for puppets on sticks in the future. Er, the past... You know what I mean.

I really wanted to love this pilot, and I'm sure a number of people did, but at the end of the day, I was just plain bored a lot of the time. The whole thing felt inelegantly devised and like it had been cut and pasted together from 9 other shows and 15 previous drafts. It just didn't seem to have its own identity. In theory, this is something that can easily develop over time, but really, I don't know if I want to give it that much time. I walked away from this pilot without much of an attachment to anyone. Indeed, the two characters that I found the most interesting were the two main Sixers who, all told, saw maybe 10 minutes of screentime, if that. I'm not the least bit invested in the Shannon family or their petty squabbles. In yet another trope that drives me crazy, I had to endure a family bickering over stupid, meaningless crap while there are dinosaurs trying to kill people. Yeah, so Papa Shannon went to jail for two years for punching that cop who was after his daughter, right? At one point, after the family has traveled back in time 85 millions years, whiny teenager Josh actually gets pissed at his dad for leaving them for two years and making them fend for themselves. Uh, you mean when he was in prison? Geez, the nerve of that guy! Don't worry though, the prison is squalid nightmare where they can't even use re-breathers, but Jim got a clean shave every morning, that's for damn sure. Seriously, he's supposed to look all haggard and worn, but there isn't even a trace of stubble on his cheek. Heh. What's worse, it's later revealed by the son that they probably would have incurred some sort of fine for having a third child. Seriously?! Jim freaked out and started punching people because he was afraid of a fine?! I thought the soldiers were going to kill the girl! It's things like this that make me think this script went through about a dozen drafts. At one point, maybe the soldiers would have killed the girl, but in a later draft, that seemed to harsh, so they watered it down. Quite frankly, I think it would have made for a much more compelling if the soldiers had killed the daughter. Not only would it have established the future in a way that was much more terrifying, but it would have given the family as a whole a deep-seeded resentment against the government that could have been spun into thrilling storylines once they got to the colony. Are they really loyal? Might they join the Sixers? It would have given the show a lot more gravity than it has. Hell, at the end of the day, after dinosaur attacks and military engagements, no one was killed? Seriously? Well, maybe this place isn't so scary after all... And I don't think that's a good thing.

It was all the little things that let Terra Nova down. There was no one failing that made me dislike it, no big giant Jim Caviezel to bore me to tears. Little things like the prisoner's lack of stubble, the see-through medical charts (because apparently patient privacy is a thing of the past... er, future), clothes that apparently came from The Gap and Ann Taylor (I swear to god, I think I own that sweater the mom had on), references and verbal turns of phrase that felt idiosyncratic and out of place for the future, piles upon piles of cliches, etc. all came together to the clear detriment of the storytelling. Were the narrative more compelling and original, the little things wouldn't have mattered. But, when the characters are bland and unmemorable, the conceit is overwrought and derivative, and overall narrative drive is inconsistent, the little things are much more glaring. When my family and I weren't actively mocking the show, we were pretty bored. For comparison's sake, we watched the CW's sappy, schlocky new series Hart of Dixie right after this and even for as bad as it was, we weren't as bored. At one point we were noting how cheesy and it was and I said, "Well, it's bad, but I'm not as bored as I was with Terra Nova." A sentiment echoed by the room. How sad is that? Yikes.

In fairness, it wasn't a total disaster and really does have some good elements to work with. I think if the writers can settle in and really get a good grip on their goals for the show, it could turn into something really good. While I'm not chomping at the bit for more, I think is has enough in place that I'm willing to hang on. I'm genuinely intrigued by the Sixers' story, even if not much else. My hope is that Terra Nova can break away from all the cliches and craft its own identity. If it can manage that, I think it could easily turn into something more captivating than it is. If, however, they insist on following the melodramatic, charmless Shannon family for the entirety of the show, I'll be tuning out sooner than later. Seriously, for a show with this kind of concept, I would have expected someone, anyone to have had some edge and uniqueness. Quite the contrary, I felt like I was watching the wacky hijinx of one Time Traveler Barbie after another. Here's hoping for better down the line.

Pilot Grade: C-

TV Review: Pan Am

2011-09-26T14:22:00.002-06:00

So far, in the battle of similar shows for the fall season, we have our first real winner and loser. In the competition for "60's era throwback hoping to cash in on some of Mad Men's appeal", Pan Am is the clear victor, The Playboy Club the obvious casualty.

On the surface, and based on the promotional campaign, Pan Am seemed like a lighter-than-air send up of 60's fashion and an age when flying was glamorous and not the never-ending quest to smuggle 3.2 ounces of shampoo in your carry-on. And back when the thought of a pilot didn't bring you to the nauseating mental image of Jake from The Bachelor? Ah, the halcyon days of yore... To a certain extent, Pan Am definitely fulfills that promise, creating an atmosphere of the 60's that I gladly got swept up in. It all had a shiny, polished Catch Me If You Can vibe that was surprisingly well done and convincing. Beneath the shiny surface, however, the pilot establishes its four heroines as interesting women leading complicated lives, ranging from affairs to broken engagements to international espionage. Yeah, that last one came as the real surprise. When the pilot first began to establish the storyline, I was a bit skeptical, but as the pilot progressed, I was definitely on board. The show's international capabilities and historical flavor made the espionage angle exciting and believable, giving the show a sense of mystery and and intrigue that I genuinely didn't see coming. Espionage is always such a lovely surprise, isn't it?

Beyond the twisty or romantic plot points, it's the characters who are the core of the show. The show did an outstanding job of establishing quite a few different characters in a very short amount of time, relying on well-integrated flashbacks to flesh out each of their back stories. In spite of the number of people involved, it didn't feel rushed or forced. Indeed, the direction was very good and the pilot flowed naturally, keeping an entertaining pace throughout, all the while covering a lot of exposition. Not an easy task. Indeed, by the end of the pilot, I was kind of bummed that it was over. I got so swept up in the people, the the fabulous 60's locations around the world (I thought the special effects were quite good), and the storyline that I never once checked to see where I was in the episode and was a little surprised that 43 minutes had flown by so quickly. (I'm suddenly realizing how many unintentional puns are littered throughout this sucker. Just go with it.) Amid the personal and professional plot exposition, an ongoing storyline involving Kate's first spy mission kept me on my toes throughout, worrying that she'd be exposed, that the mission would fail, etc. It gave the pilot a nice air of suspense. I found myself really getting invested in each of these people and was genuinely dismayed at the end when it was revealed that Kate was actually replacing the elusive Bridget as the new intelligence agent. Where's Bridget? Is she dead? Why is she being replaced? What exactly did she do for them? The fact that I wondered these things at all and was so invested in the answer speaks highly of the show and bodes well for its future.

All in all, there's very little to complain about with this stylish, romantic, exciting new series. The onscreen talent is strong across the board, with each of the lead actresses bringing something unique and interesting to her role. In spite of the number of very pretty people to keep track of, I never mixed anyone up or got confused, and I walked away feeling like I have a real understanding of these women, their lives, and how liberating the job of stewardess was in some ways and how restrictive in others. The Playboy Club claims that their bunnies were the women with all the power back in the 60's, but I think it's the ladies flying 35,000 feet over the bunnies heads. In spite of the strictly-enforced uniform, complete with girdle, the restrictions and requirements, the ogling eyes of the passengers, these women got to see the world and live independently. It was an escape for monotony, from marriage, from parents, from whatever. At the end of the episode, the pilots are discussing the fact that they're different from other women, and that they're evolved. "There's more to life than primordial ooze," one pontificates. There certainly is for these women. While The Playboy Club hardly sold me on the power and independence of its bunnies, Pan Am made their case and won. I'm sure the job wasn't as glamorous as the show makes it seem, but it sparkled onscreen. In terms of perceptions of women in general, the role of stewardess doesn't seem like much a "votes for women!" step in the right direction, but taken in context of the era, it gave women a lot more freedom than many of their more traditional counterparts, and for that, I heartily approve.

All you can really ask of a pilot is that the audience wants to know more. Not only do I want to know more, but I already feel like I have an awful lot. When discussing the show at work, I was able to recount all the main characters' names without even trying. Beyond names, I feel like I have a fair grasp of who they are why they're doing what they're doing. That's a tall order for 5 episodes to fill, let alone one. Kelli Garner does a particularly nice job as novice spy Kate, but she's in good company with fine performances all around. The show created a cohesive universe and milieu for these characters to exist and it allowed the actors to really craft their roles. There were a few minor elements that I quibbled with, but when stacked up against all the show has going for it, they're hardly worth mentioning at all.

Pilot Grade: B+

TV Review: Prime Suspect

2011-09-26T10:35:00.002-06:00

It's getting to the point where reviewing NBC pilots is just depressing. Not because they're all terrible, mind you, but because even the few that don't suck have such a slim chance of surviving. The Jeff Zucker years were not kind and NBC seems to have been "rebuilding" for ages now, to no avail. It is with that preamble that I review one of the better pilots of the fall, hopefully completing said review before the show gets canceled.

Prime Suspect stars Maria Bello (who will always be Anna Dellamiko in my heart) as a NYC homicide detective who is a good cop operating in a man's world, being undercut and harassed at every turn by her male counterparts. While I don't doubt that there's more than a little "boys' club" ridiculousness and discrimination that goes on in this kind of a workplace, it all felt a little dated and unrealistic. I'm sure there are a lot of sexist bastards out there who think these things, but it's quite another to publicly and openly harass someone like that. This show is actually a US adaptation of a British show (which starred Helen Mirren in the lead role, if you want a quick primer in American vs. British television priorities), so maybe that explains that oppressively sexist overtones. For as much as I love British programming and for as advanced and forward-thinking as the Brits generally are, there's an undercurrent of sexism in British shows that always strikes me as incredibly odd and unabashed. Perhaps that sentiment traveled across the pond along with the show.

For as irksome as the overt sexism was to watch, the show pulled it off well and crafted a work environment for Bello which, while I hope to hell is an exaggeration of reality, gave her ample chances to shine as an actress. For as eye-rolling as replacing Mirren with a younger, blonder actress was on the surface, Bello completely holds her own as the rough and tumble heroine Jane Timoney, who's attractive, but not unrealistic. It's a difficult role to manage and she pulled it off with charm and grace. Indeed, this kind of set-up, with this kind of lead role would oftentimes generate a heroine that wasn't particularly endearing or believable, but Bello's layered performance gives Timoney the range necessary to grab viewers. She's tough and composed, but she's not heartless or vindictive (even though she probably should be). For as often as the men in her department treated her like shit and told her she was invading their clubhouse, she held it together and kept a composed public face. Which isn't to say that in the privacy of her own home she was stiff as a board, but everyone, male or female, has a public and private face that they maintain.

Had Bello's performance not been as strong, I think her nauseatingly sexist colleagues would have driven me away within minutes. The show actually did a lovely, and surprisingly subtle job of making them look like the complete assholes that they are. The writers didn't shove it down the viewers' throats with grandiose speeches about equality or a cheesy voiceover explaining how things are different for men and women. Instead, they let Bello's face do the talking as she endures constant abuse with reserve and dignity. That isn't to say she sits idly as her career passes her by. She was refreshingly pragmatic and direct about her position, her colleagues, and her career path, not letting even the nastiest of invective tarnish her resolve. It was pretty apparent going in that this would be a tale of "look, she's a girl AND she's a hell of a cop!" but it played out surprisingly well. Even when Bello was clearly playing into that trope, showing up all the boys with her detective skills, it didn't come across as preachy or self-righteous. Indeed, the writers did a very nice job showing how Timoney's skill set would be beneficial to a case, female or not. The one aspect of her investigation that did hinge on the fact that she's female, specifically, is that she was able to exclude one of the suspects based on her history in vice. I particularly liked this because it seems that all female cops have had to work vice, which is annoying as hell, so at least in this instance, it worked to her advantage.

As per usual with this kind of sexist set-up, after Timoney takes over and solves the case, she gets more grief rather than less. It's bad enough in these guys' minds that she invaded their turf, but it's far worse to actually be competent. The truly unfortunate thing with women in these kind of roles or racial minorities, members of the gay community, etc, is that it doesn't matter how many times they do something right, it's the one time they do something wrong that they will carry with them. The men around her are just waiting for something to happen that they can latch onto that proves that women can't do this job. The other men might make this same mistake a million times, but it's irrelevant. It's the one time the woman screws up that not only invalidates everything she does, but all women in general. White men are allowed to be individuals. Women represent the entire gender as a whole. Sorry to be soapboxing here, but I've been in Timoney's shoes before, to a lesser extent, so I feel for her. I think most women have been in similar situations and know what its like to carry an entire gender's reputation on her shoulders. It isn't easy. Or fun. And it's a lot of pressure to endure. As such, this pilot hit home on more than a few levels, which made for an uncomfortable viewing experience at times.

Bearing that in mind, the fact that it made me uncomfortable and even pissed me off doesn't mean it was a poor pilot. Indeed, even in the subtler ways that it exposed the male/female dichotomy of her work environment, the show made its case and let the audience decide. For me, one of the most effective scenes was when the most sexist and prejudicial guy of them all gets a phonecall from his 4-year-old daughter. It's very clear that he, along with all his sexist male colleagues, absolutely adore this little girl, singing Happy Birthday to her and wishes the best of possible birthday wishes. I'm guessing a lot of people in the audience saw this as a redemptive scene whereby the audience gets to see that these guys aren't so bad after all. Who knows. Maybe that was the intent. From where I'm sitting though, it was a further indictment of these men's actions. How you can you adore a daughter and be excited for all the wonderful things to come in her life and yet treat women like this? It's always strikes me as so completely confounding that men can be so excited about their daughters, wanting only the best for them, but see women as weak wastes of space who are only allowed to do certain male-approved activities. "That's right, princess. You can be anything you want to be. As long as it's a homemaker. Or a nurse. Or maybe a kindergarten teacher." How can these men not see their own hypocrisy? I just don't get it.

I'm really going to try to move past the gender coding issue, but for a pilot like this, it's kind of a big deal. The only other aspect that I have to address is the end of the episode where Timoney chases a serial rapist and murderer into an alley and gets beaten up and tossed around like a rag doll by the guy. It was already established that this perpetrator was a little guy (slender build, maybe 5'9"), but he nearly kills Timoney without so much as a single hit from her. Now, I have no doubt that given the circumstances, any police officer, male or female, would likely need back-up for this situation. But for a tough cop, who has had extensive training, to not so much as land a punch seemed kind of ridiculous to me. At the end of the day, or in this case, at the end of the episode, she still needs a big strong man to come and save her. I was thoroughly disappointed. I came up with some narrative reasons for why the writers would have done this, but none of them were particularly satisfying. I like to think that they wanted us to understand that women are the victims of violent crimes the majority of the time and that it makes sense for a woman, who's been in those shoes, to investigate such crimes. It makes sense to me. Hell, if I had just been raped by some aggressive alpha male, the last people in the world I'd want to talk to about it would be an entire room of aggressive alpha males. No thanks. Send in a female detective. And if you don't have one in your department, promote someone.

The case of the week was well-crafted, if completely secondary to Timoney's personal journey. While I enjoyed Bello's performance quite a lot, this is a cop show first and foremost, which makes it hard for me to really jump for joy. I've heard that they'll be toning down the sexist overtones considerably, so while that will make for a more pleasant viewing experience, I'm not sure it will make for a more interesting one. The actual police work on these shows very rarely interests me, so it's the actors personal journeys that I focus on. Good cop shows can overlap the two in ways that make me care about both (like The Chicago Code) and so far, Prime Suspect has done a nice job interlacing Timoney's personal and professional lives. I'll certainly be giving this one another chance, but based on the ratings for the pilot, I'm going to try not to get too attached. It really is a quality show with a great cast, but on NBC, even quality programming doesn't stand much of a chance.

Pilot Grade: B-

TV Review: Person of Interest

2011-09-23T09:51:00.007-06:00

And the award for most unbelievably impressive and deceptive promotional department goes to...!

Person of Interest!

Congratulations! Sort of! For outstanding achievement in the art of making a straight-up procedural with an incredibly bland, boring lead look like a serial drama and thriller, we doff our hats to you. Whatever they're paying you, it isn't enough.

Maybe my disappointment stems from the fact that I went in with too high of expectations, maybe the impressive creative team blinded me to potential foibles, maybe CBS simply has to rigid a brand for anything but The Good Wife to break through... Nope, it's Jim Caviezel. He's the problem.

Person of Interest stars Caviezel as an ex-military something or other who went off grid (presumed dead) and abandoned his old life after his wife/girlfriend/fiance/who knows died. After several years living as a vagrant basically, he resurfaces and is offered a job by a Mr. Finch (Benjamin Linus) to help prevent crimes. Using an anti-terror "machine" he created which intercepts cell phone calls, accesses surveillance cameras, hacks email etc., Finch is sent a list of social security numbers which correspond to people who are going to be involved in crimes. With only the social security numbers, neither he nor Caviezel know how this person will be involved (whether victim, perpetrator, or otherwise), but they know that the machine generated their number for a reason. Finch hires Caviezel to stop these crimes before they happen in a pseudo Minority Report kind of way. They monitor the "person of interest" through a variety of methods and then come in guns-a-blazin' to stop the evil-doings from going down. Based on that premise, the creative team (which includes JJ Abrams and Jonathan Nolan (who was one of the screenwriters for The Dark Knight), and on the promotional materials, I had very high hopes for this pilot. You couldn't ask for a stronger team behind the scenes, but as it turns out, you can most certainly ask for a stronger team onscreen.

Michael Emerson is a power-player who does a lovely job as Mr. Finch. Sure I'll never be able to see him as anything other than Benjamin Linus ever again, but that doesn't mean he doesn't pull it off. He comes across with a fairly disturbing intelligence and breadth of knowledge about nearly everything and seduces Caviezel into a job that could easily get them both killed. Emerson was not the problem. I could happily watch Emerson do just about anything week to week and be happy... Caviezel on the other hand...

I knew I didn't like Jim Caviezel going into this pilot, but I honestly couldn't remember why. As such, I was hoping that my bias was imaginary and that he'd do a lovely job. Yeah, it only took about 5 minutes for me to remember why I didn't like him. He is truly and unceasingly horrible as an actor. Simply awful. I swear to god, it was like watching a block of wood run around town surveiling and shooting people. Only a block of wood would have been more interesting to watch because it has no opposable thumbs and no brain, so shooting people would be most impressive. Caviezel's performance was completely flat from beginning to end. I realize he's playing a military veteran who's been through tragedy and all and who is probably fairly reserved these days, but Caviezel brings absolutely nothing to the role. It's not that his character had a cool resolved with something smoldering underneath the surface. There was nothing there at all. He could have played it with subtlety and restraint, that would have been fine, but there has to be something, anything deeper to rely on. I got nothing from Caviezel at any point. What's worse, even when it was obvious that he was trying to imbue a line with anger or apprehension or disgust, he failed so miserably that it was almost comedic. It felt like when you're doing an impression of a bad actor, only this was real. He couldn't convey even the most basic of emotions, letting each line land with a ker-plunk, losing all sense of intensity or intrigue. Beyond that, he's a mumbler of the highest order, so even if the words themselves could have had potential, in subtitled form, it was kind of a fail all the way around. It was truly painful to watch and managed to lessen the enjoyment I was getting from Emerson's turn as the mysterious benefactor. Based on Caviezel's total lack of performance, it's hard to even judge the rest of the pilot. He was such a complete turnoff that it was impossible for me to connect with the show in any substantive way or get invested in the storyline.

The basic concept, in and of itself, had some promise. Though slightly hokey, I had hope that the show would pull it off and deliver a true thriller, delving into the physical and psychological aspects of crime and crime prevention. Hell, the basis for Minority Report is pretty absurd on the surface, but it made for a rather entertaining and exciting movie. Here, I think CBS got its sticky fingers on things and turned what could have been an edge-of-your-seat thriller into your typical procedural. I figured the show would have some procedural elements, but after seeing the pilot, it's pretty clear that it's going to have very little, if anything, that isn't a procedural element. If you're into procedurals, more power to you, but I need more from a drama. If I'm never going to see that person again, I don't think I care to spend an hour finding out how he or she is involved in some random would-be crime of the week. I just don't care. That said, I do watch the occasional procedural, but that's when the cast is spectacular or the concept tweaks it such that the cases of the week have a direct effect on the regular cast. Here, we have Jim Caviezel at the center of the show who brings absolutely nothing to the role. Honestly I wouldn't even really care what he brought to the role, so long as it was something. He could have taken the Michael Westen bent, the Patrick Jane angle, hell, even the Steven Segal action approach and that would have been better. Caviezel gave me nothing to hold onto at all. It's impossible to care about a character who has no character, let alone the random events he engages in week to week. In a weird way, the case of the week was actually more interesting than the regular cast. Granted I'll never see them ever again, but Natalie Zea brought a lot more depth and acting ability to her role du jour than Caviezel did. My only thought is that the producers wanted a movie name for the role and settled on Caviezel after he blackmailed them or something. No, strike that. There's no way he'd ever do anything that interesting.

All in all, I'm extremely disappointed. The critics and I expected this to be one of the best pilots of the fall and instead we got a lackluster procedural with a terrible lead. What little supporting cast the show has is fine and all, but besides Michael Emerson, had very little to do with the pilot so it's tough to decide if they'll help temper Caviezel's crappiness. I doubt anything could do that, but the pilot didn't even give them a chance to try. Apparently Taraji P. Henson is on board as a cop or something, but she had about 2 minutes onscreen, so who knows how that's going to turn out. As is, her talents were wasted on a pilot that could have seriously benefited from them. On paper, this should have been a home run. In reality, it was shockingly dull for a show about an hired gun going about killing bad guys and preventing murders. Had a different actor been at the helm, the weaker narrative elements could have easily been excused. I'm more than happy to overlook some structural shortcomings if I'm interested in the cast. It's how I endured so many seasons of House. The medical case of the week was an afterthought. Hugh Laurie was the draw. Person of Interest has no such draw.

I guess in theory this should could turn into something more, but I honestly don't care to find out. I was so bored by the procedural nature of the show and Caviezel's vacant stares that I just kept wanting the pilot to hurry up and be over. I'm going to try to force myself to give it another week, but based on the preview for the next episode, it's going to be a whole lot of the same. Random potential crime of the week and a block of wood. Emerson deserves better. Caviezel deserves an eternity of acting classes.

When discussing this show at work, Annie offered up that at least Caviezel is attractive. Granted, a pretty face can make up for a lot of shortcomings, but I can hardly imagine the astronomical levels of divine pulchritude he would have to have to make up for his utter lack of talent. So yeah, good luck with that, Jim.

Pilot Grade: D

TV Review: Revenge

2011-09-22T15:32:00.005-06:00

"This is not a story about forgiveness..."

In case the title of the show was too subtle, ABC's latest drama Revenge establishes the premise right out of the gate. Thanks! It's fortunate because the rest of the pilot was more than a little murky...

Which isn't to say that it wasn't good. I imagine that the writers and producers were so knee-deep in mystery and intrigue that they couldn't view it through fresh eyes and had a hard time putting in elements that the audience would need in the right order. Or, they simply wanted the audience to be a little confused. Either way, it was slightly irksome, but ultimately came together in the end. Sort of.

Revenge stars Emily Van Camp as a woman whose life was destroyed when she was a child and who is now hellbent on puppies. I mean revenge. She returns to the Hamptons, which near as I can tell is like colonial Australia for wealthy nogoodniks, where she puts plans into motion to destroy those who ruined her life. Although the pilot fails to lay out this web of intrigue in any particularly elegant way, by the end of the pilot it has been established that her father's friends and colleagues did some bad things and set up a web of lies and deceits that put her father in prison for their crimes. Said father died some time prior to the beginning of the pilot, leaving a box of journals and letters to daughter, explaining his innocence and expressly telling his daughter to choose forgiveness. Spoiler alert. She doesn't.

The pilot opens with a line from Confucius which states, "Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves." I positively can't stand it when a show starts off with the definition of a word, like, say, "revenge," but to start off with this quote gave the pilot a nice literary flavor that really set the tone. The concept for this show is very loosely based on The Count of Monte Cristo, so it struck a nice tone. This series will clearly err more on the side of soapy thriller than a literary classic, but even if it borrows an element here and an element there, you could hardly ask for better source material. That said, I'm not sure how this concept will play out as an entire series, potentially spanning several seasons. If they play their cards write, they'll reinvent the show season to season rather than dragging out the base concept until the end of time.

The show focuses on Emily Thorn nee Amanda Clarke, played by Van Camp, who has grown up and is now unrecognizable to the obscenely wealthy backstabbers she knew as a child. The pilot flashes back and forth between her childhood, now now, and five months prior to now now. Along with that, there are child versions of various characters, different time frames to keep track of, and numerous characters, all of whom are interconnected to everyone else on the show in different, very important ways. It was a lot to keep track of and my family and I found ourselves a tad lost on several occasions, usually along the lines of, "Wait, so was that the same guy as before? Wasn't he married to that blonde woman?" I can see where this show had a hell of a lot to establish right off the bat, but it got a bit tiresome. Like I said, by the end I felt like I had a pretty firm grasp on who was who and how each person was related to everyone else, but it was a lot to take in. Were this a classic novel, we'd be 287 pages in by now, not 43 minutes. Had the pilot been crafted in a more elegant way, I think it all would have flowed together seamlessly, creating a complex web of intrigue for viewers to explore. As is, they created a web, but I kind of just felt like I got stuck in it. As the weeks progress, I'm sure it will all crystallize, but the pilot just felt a little to clunky at times and like it missed opportunities in others.

Foibles aside, I'm genuinely intrigued by this show, its premise, and the promise of twisty, naughty, knotty things to come. Again, it's hard to see how a concept like this will last for years and years, but if they play their mythology right, it could certainly keep me entertained for quite some time. The basic concept holds a lot of appeal for the gossip-mongering, vengeful side of me and I truly enjoyed watching the smirk break out on Emily's face when the pieces of her plan came into focus. While the pathos aspect has the potential to be quite riveting in its own right, the quite at the beginning tells me that the show will be examining not just the tawdry twists and turns of revenge, but the personal toll it takes as well. I'm as intrigued to see how this treacherous path affects our heroine as I am to see which rich bitch bites the big one next. I'm not entirely sure Van Camp can pull off the emotional range needed for such a role, but she did a nice job in the pilot and held her own on Everwood as well. She's truly the anchor of the show and acts as the viewer's window into this twisted mess, so she better be ready to bear the weight of the show on her shoulders. This is her story and its success or failure is hers to claim. I, for one, definitely hope she pulls it off.

Along with Van Camp, the supporting cast is quite strong, with each cast member embracing his/her role and running with it. In spite of the somber tone of the concept, I got the feeling the show knows deep down that it's a soapy drama at heart and opted not to take itself too seriously. Or at least to try. The cast is expansive (although at the rate they're going, it will likely be pared down in no time--poison will do that), so only a few got serious screentime in the pilot, but they all did a serviceable job at least and quite a nice job at best. Madeline Stowe, in particular, plays the ice queen with devilish delight, banishing her onetime best friend without a second thought. That said, it was hard to keep the no-name actors straight from place to place, time to time, relationship to relationship, so some of the story aspects lost some of their punch. I almost wish they had cast some more familiar faces. It was very easy to keep Connor Paolo straight in my head. Random J. Boatowner? Not so much. Again, that should improve over time and if I can force myself to pay better attention than I have lately. There were a lot of distractions going on when I watched this, so there's a fair chance it was very logically and clearly laid out and I was just too distracted to notice.

The pilot established a lot of people and relationships, sparking more than a little intrigue, but it also left a lot of up in the air. The fact that Emily's late father was played by James Tupper, an actual name, tells me that we'll be seeing a lot more flashbacks in the future which should help fill in the holes over time. In the original pilot, he was played by Marc Blucas, so while I don't exactly have a poster of Tupper over my bed or anything, he's a vast improvement over Blucas. Unless of course Emily's father was known for sucking the life out of a room, in which case, losing Blucas was a serious blow to the series. I'm hopeful this show goes about filling in the wholes and exposing people and motives in an effective way. Handled with kid gloves, this could be an intriguing journey through past, recent past, and present to figure out just how Emily ended up at her engagement party while her fiance was being murdered on the beach. The show bookended recent past (5 months ago) with now now, showing us where things will end up in 5 months time, then going back to fill in the blanks. As much as I loathe the "3 days earlier" trope, in this instance, I think it will prove to be most effective. The audience doesn't know if Emily's engagement is for real, if she fell for her enemy's son, if she was in on the murder, or a combination of all three. Her face is inscrutable as her fiance's murder is relayed to the crowd, so we genuinely don't know what she knows or what hand she may have played. In terms of revenge destroyed the one seeking it, I think this set up the series in a thought-provoking and titillating way. I can't say for sure how the show will get back to now now, but I'm intrigued enough to want to find out.

All in all, the pilot certainly had some issues, but I quite enjoyed it overall. I'm still skeptical about turning this concept into a multi-year series, but I've thought that about a lot of shows that have gone on to entertain me for ages. At the end of the day, reservations aside, this is a highly serialized drama, not some crap procedural, so even with its flaws, it gets a lot of points in my book. I'm really hoping it all comes together because it has a hell of a lot of potential. "Coming together" depends on a hell of a lot of variables, but a little luck, Revenge could turn into quite the twisted thriller and maybe even a psychological examination of what payback brings to the, uh, payer-backer. You know what I mean. Come on, Van Camp! You can do this!

In short, it's a total guilty pleasure with more than a few soapy elements, but that's just fine with me.

Pilot Grade: B-

TV Review: 2 Broke Girls and The Playboy Club

2011-09-20T11:30:00.004-06:00

Well, Monday was a pretty pitiful day for new programming, I can tell you that much. Returning shows Castle and to a much lesser extent How I Met Your Mother were the highlights of the evening. Yes, even HIMYM showed some signs of life, although it's on probation. I'm going to take Annie's lead and give it a chance so long as they don't have two bad episodes back-to-back. Even at it's best these days, it's really more "pleasant" than anything else, but for a 20 minute distraction, that's really all I need. That said, I was no fan of Victoria the first time around. Ugh.

Anyway, on to the drivel! I, uh, mean new shows!

2 BROKE GIRLS

Oh my holy god this was painful. I had heard from several critics that it was supposed to be really good, but as it turns out, the critics were smoking massive amounts of crack at the time of viewing... Holy hell this was bad. In all honesty, I only made it 7 minutes in before I simply couldn't take it anymore (a record heretofore held by the pilot for Outsourced), so who knows? Maybe it rallied in it's last 20 minutes or something... I doubt it. Kat Dennings is charmless and has no discernible comedic chops. I only saw about a minute of her costar, so I can't really judge conclusively, but I think it's safe to say she wasn't any better. Aside from the unfunny leads, the show was also awash in tacky ethnic stereotypes that have never been funny. The show basically has Long Duk Dong in the role of horrifying Asian stereotype, Uncle Remus rounding out the offensive African American angle, and I hardly know what to say about the lascivious Russian. It was all in poor taste and was completely off-putting. I'm no politically correct prude, but if you're going to push boundaries or take stabs at people, they have to work. These did not. Such characterizations weren't funny 40 years ago, let alone now. In a modern context, it felt idiosyncratic and lame. It would be like a current comedy revolving around Three Stooges style slap stick. Ugh. Anyway, the jokes were painfully forced, the odd couple concept has been way over played (speaking of old motifs), and the cast was terrible. The only line I appreciated was because of Breaking Bad, weirdly enough. Kat's character laments the loss of the meth addict because she was such a good cleaner. Based on my wealth of knowledge about tweakers, thanks to Breaking Bad, I had to chuckle at this. It was the one and only laugh and it had more to do with another show than this one. Show fail.

Pilot Grade (well, the first 7 minutes at least): F

**Update: Having read on AV Club that the second half of the pilot was considerably better than the first, I decided to plow through the rest of the episode. Indeed, the second half was far better than the first. That doesn't mean it's a good show, but puts it at the level of simply "awful" rather than "please dear god, kill me". Baby steps.

Pilot Grade (the entire episode this time): D

THE PLAYBOY CLUB

Dear Religious Nutbags, Conservative Right-Wing Censors, and The Parents' Television Council: Maybe you should actually see a show before condemning it. I'm not saying The Playboy Club is an excellent show that is truly deserving of millions of viewers or anything, but the reason people should tune out is that it simply isn't very good, not because it's smutty or racy or licentious or whatever it is you morons think it is.

This show was tame, people. Insanely tame. I'm actually kind of surprised at just how tame it was. Any show that knew what it was doing would take the right wing condemnation and run with it (a la Gossip Girl appropriating the comments from the Parents' Television Council into their advertising), but The Playboy Club was more wholesome than any random episode of any procedural cop show that I've ever seen. The one and only sex scene, if you can really call it that, showed nothing really and was between a long-term couple who've been discussing getting married. SCANDAL! Oh sure, it's all fine and good to show women being brutally gang-raped and murdered on every episode of every procedural on TV, but The Playboy Club, with its lack of nudity, sex, foul language, and serious violence, that's going too far! Stupid, delusional hypocrites, every one of them.

Anyway, now that that's out of my system, like I said, the reason to bow out of The Playboy Club is that it's just not a very good show. The setting is the 1960s, specifically the Playboy Club and Playboy Mansion, but they seem to be set pieces rather than an actual atmosphere. Where Mad Men creates a milieu of the 60s that you get swept up in, The Playboy Club seems to have rummaged through a few thrift stores and garage sales looking for old stuff to fill the scene. I've seen more than a few critiques that his show is trying to be Mad Men, but really, they have a similar setting, but are wholly different animals in execution. Mad Men is unflinching in its portrayal of the 60s, imbuing each scene, character, and interaction with the social mores of the time. The Playboy Club casually alludes to such issues of race and gender, but isn't willing to dive in or let such things influence a scene in any substantive way.

While the atmosphere is weak, the storyline is worse. The show tries to set up a twisty, thrilling, dangerous narrative right off the bat, but doesn't bother to establish any of the characters first, so the twists and turns and suspense are totally wasted. Literally, within the first ten minutes of the pilot, main bunny Amber Heard (I haven't the slightest idea what her character name is) goes from working the floor at the Playboy Club, killing a would-be rapist in self defense, and helping main guy Eddie Cibrian dispose of the guy's body because he's apparently a murderous mobster or something. So yeah, within minutes, a man and woman I don't know and don't care about are in mortal peril with the threat of exposure hanging over their heads. Yep, don't care. If they wanted this pilot to work, they should have spent the pilot establishing this world and these people, only to have the guy's death come at the very end. If I even kind of cared about these people, I might have enjoyed the pilot more, but as is, the narrative just seems to be random things happening to pretty faces. That's simply not enough to invest in. Especially with the acting as poor as it was.

The supporting cast had a lot more going for it (with Carol Lynn being far and away the best part of the show), but not enough screentime to get me invested. It's hardly worth recalling the details, but the biggest thrills came in the realization that Simon Tam and Mr. Universe were among the cast. Sure they're wasted and all, but it was still nice to see some faces that I actually cared about. A nice change of pace, really. I found myself investing in their characters based on their past roles alone, which is not a good sign for their current show.

It wasn't the worst pilot I've ever seen before, but it just didn't have enough panache or polish to pull off this conceit. I've heard that the pilot underwent some serious retooling prior to air and I can tell. From the trailer, it looked far worse than it was. Unfortunately, such efforts may have spared The Playboy Club from the bottom of the barrel, but hardly raised it to the top of the heap. Quite frankly, I think my perceptions of the show were mostly colored by the fact that I watched this right after 2 Broke Girls. Compared to that piece of shit, this really didn't seem all that terrible, you know? I at least finished the pilot for this one.

Pilot Grade: C-

TV Review: The Secret Circle

2011-09-16T10:04:00.005-06:00

Whenever a beloved writer or showrunner picks up a new project in the midst of his/her current project, I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, it's always exciting to see a creative team that you love producing more material, but on the other hand, you have to wonder if both shows will suffer as a result of the showrunner being spread too thin. Upon hearing that Kevin Williamson was going to be in charge of The Secret Circle, a companion piece to his Julie Plec co-project The Vampire Diaries, to say I was conflicted would be an understatement. Having now seen the fruits of his labor, I'm just as conflicted, but more hopeful.

The Secret Circle seems to operate in the same basic universe of The Vampire Diaries, but so far focuses on witches exclusively. The pilot follows Cassie Blake (played by Britt Robertson, whom you'll remember hating as Lux last year... at least I sure did) as she journeys to her mother's home town to live with her grandmother, following the, um, "accident" that killed her mother only minutes into the pilot. Upon arriving in small town Washington state (which, near as I can tell, has the highest per capita of pretty people on the planet, second only to Mystic Falls), she finds out that she actually comes from a long lineage of witches, as do 5 other teenagers in town and their parents. It's a lot of ground to cover in only 43 minutes and it made for a few misfires along the way. The pilot piles on the plot exposition and foundational elements necessary for the actual narrative to begin, establishing the six primary families involved, the universe in which the show operates (which I'm calling Mystic Falls East), the principles of magic in said universe, some of the mythology of the series, and the over-arching narrative drives that will guide the first season. Given the amount of ground they covered in such a short period of time, I'm actually pretty surprised that it came across as successfully as it did. While there were certainly aspects of the pilot that felt rushed, it took time for some small moments and presented memorable, if characters--characters that I want to know more about, even if I'm not entirely sure I'll be investing whole hog in the future. The characters have yet to be fleshed out, and after only one episode are really more superficial than substantive, but I'm intrigued enough to want to give them time to grow. At this point, the writers essentially picked one personality trait for each character to embody rather than giving a range. Some critics may pooh-pooh such a one-note portrayal, but when you have that many characters to establish that quickly, I think it's best to pick one feature for viewers to hold onto and worry about imbuing layers later on. Had they presented each character in his/her wide range of facets, the pilot would have felt even more rushed than it did. They piqued my interest with the basics and I'm more than happy to wait for more substance and depth later on.

Presenting characters in simplified terms comes with mixed results, however. While I understand and appreciate stripping characters down to their basic constitution for the sake of the pilot, each character's likability weighs heavily on which single dimension is chosen. Cassie is given the most range, what with her being the central character, but I found her to be one of the least engaging characters from the pilot. As mentioned above, I hated her as Lux in Life Unexpected for a number of reasons, most of which have carried over to The Secret Circle. Apparently it wasn't just her old character that I despised. It's her. It's difficult to pinpoint what exactly irks me about her, but it's ever-present. I guess she just comes across as a whiny sad-sack whether her character warrants it or not. Her mother recently died in The Secret Circle, so her moodiness is consistent with her character arc, but that doesn't make her any more endearing. Any number of actors can pull off the brooding in a way that makes me love them, but Britt is just a total turn-off. She comes across as one of those people who's constantly pissy, but who isn't snarky or edgy enough to make it work. It's as though it's the world's constant job to make amends and apologize for her life not going exactly the way she wants it to. Hell, I saw her in an interview and couldn't believe she was the same humorless wet blanket she is in her roles. Sigh. I'm really hoping she grows on me over time, what with her being the main focus of the show, but at this point, I was kind of hoping the car fire would win.

Were this a one-woman show starring Cassie, I certainly wouldn't be soldiering on, but luckily, the other cast members hold a fair bit of promise. It's hard to know exactly what these characters will be like in the long run because from the pilot, they fall into very specific types, particularly the teenagers. Along with pretty sad-sack Cassie, we have sweet, sensitive Adam, dismissive badboy Nick, mega-bitch Faye, twinset-wearing type A personality Diana, and token minority contestant Melissa (who, aside from being the only non-white character on the entire show, near as I can tell, had very little screentime in the pilot--she was essentially Faye's submissive sidekick at this point). Brass tacks, there's not a lot of depth yet, but I appreciated that the writers gave me specific personality traits to latch onto so that I could remember who was who. It's to the writers' credit that I remembered all their names without trying and could keep them all straight in my head. There were about a dozen major characters to establish in the pilot, so that's no easy feat. To the show's discredit, I liked the second-string characters far more than Cassie, and in particular, feel more invested in the parents than the kids. That said, until the writers flesh out the cast, I only have one impression of them and that impression isn't always good. Faye, in particular, practically smothers you with her role as sadistic rebel bitch in a way that felt incredibly forced and disingenuous. She more than any other seemed like a cardboard cutout of a "type" they wanted in the show and will benefit the most from some extra dimensions. Even as ham-fisted as her portrayal was, I'm still more intrigued by her than by Cassie. This show is supposed to be a companion to TVD? I think we found our Elena. Only less endearing... Wow, let that sink in.

The other teenagers hold more promise, with Diana in particular, striking a nice note. I immediately like her and in spite of her basic presentation in the pilot, felt like she had more depth than the others. The fact that I liked her so much poses a problem for the will-they-or-won't-they romantic set-up between Cassie and Adam, who is Diana's boyfriend. On the one hand, I like Diana more, so the thought of anyone choosing Cassie over her is off-putting at best, but on the other hand, Adam is played by Heroes alum Thomas Dekker, so maybe Diana would be better off... I don't hate Dekker the way I hate Britt Robertson, but he just didn't really seem to pop onscreen that I would I would expect the male lead to. I'm hopeful that as these characters grow on me, I'll be more invested in their romantic entanglements and whatnot, but for these two, it's going to take a hell of a lot for me to pull for them as a couple.

While the teenage contingent is obviously the primary focus of the show, for me, the real draw is the parents. Maybe I'm just getting old, maybe it's that they have a longer history and are more knowledgeable of their own mythology, but I found them to be much more intriguing. Gale Harold was the real star of the show for me and it's not just because I adored Brian Kinney on Queer as Folk. The pilot opens with his character Charlie using supernatural forces to kill Cassie's mother. It was honestly a hell of a way to open the show and drew me in instantly. His character is deliciously evil, but charming and casual at the same time. I don't know if you know me, but that's my kind of character. More than anything though, it was his use of magic that I found to be the most effective and, well, magical. While the teenagers would simply think an event into existence or earnestly ask something happen (seriously, you're just going to ask the rain to stop? "Stop this storm! Please?! Oh, you're mean."), Charlie's magic had a bent to it that I found really appealing and, in the world of the show, pretty terrifying. In the opening sequence, he's seen pouring water from a bottle onto the ground. My first thought was whether or not it was actually some sort of flammable material that he would light on fire or if part of his powers including using water as a conductor for other forces. As it turned out, he used the water from the bottle to connect with the water from Cassie's mother's sink, kind of like an object voodoo doll. The same goes for the matches he struck, causing the mother's kitchen to ignite more and more forcefully with each strike. That sequence, in conjunction with the relative silliness of the teenagers approach to magic got me wondering if the rules are different for different witches, if it's a generational thing, or if the fact that the teenagers form a complete circle is what makes the difference between needing a conductor and being able to will the clouds to start storming without a second thought. The fact that I was invested enough to start thinking about these things is a good sign for the series as a whole. A lot of the magic was fairly cheesy for the teenagers at this point, chanting dorky sentences and staring at something till it gave in, but I'm hopeful for better in the future. If there's one thing viewers learned from TVD, it's that cheesy elements can be phased out quickly and effectively (remember the crow? and the fog? and the diaries?). So let it be with The Secret Circle. If I could make one recommendation for the show (aside from retroactively casting Kristen Bell as Cassie, circa her Veronica Mars days), it would be to fully embrace Charlie's brand of spellcasting. The most effective and terrifying scene of the pilot was when Charlie makes Adam's dad start to drown while they were simply talking. It was honestly pretty chilling to hear Charlie ask if Adam's father knew what it felt like to drown, then to see exactly what that would look like, water spewing from the father's mouth as he gasps for air. Gale Harold did a lovely job with the role, making his character truly menacing without being completely one-note. More of that, please.

Did I mention that Charlie and Adam's father were talking to one another at the Boathouse Grill? Which is exactly the same as Mystic Grill, only more boaty? Okay, I realize this show is supposed to pair well with The Vampire Diaries, but in a number of ways, I wish The Secret Circle weren't so obviously conceived as a "companion piece." I love TVD and am happy to see that universe expanded, but holy hell, even the title cards look the same. What's that you say? You're family history is supernatural and mysterious and has been studiously preserved in a leatherbound journal? That doesn't sound familiar at all! Seriously, throw in a few shamelss product placements for Bing and they're barely distinguishable at times. Aside from the universe of the show having a similar milieu, there were so many story elements that overlapped with TVD that it almost got oppressive at times. It was mostly little things and occasional thematic elements, but the familiarity bred some contempt. I realize that the creative teams have a number of key players in common and that the source materials come from the same source, but having so many elements in common made the writing almost seem lazy at times. Hell, I'm pretty sure that family journal was the same prop used on TVD. Yay for recycling? As with TVD before it, I'm hopeful that The Secret Circle will quickly separate itself from the shackles of the source material and will emerge as its own animal. Without Ian Somerhalder on board, I'm not sure how successful they'll be, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

This pilot had a lot of off-putting elements, but I think it has a lot of potential. The creative team is strong and its produced by Craft and Fain (which I'm sure means nothing to you, but believe me, it matters), so I think they have a nice shot at making this work. It all really depends on where they go with the major character profiles. The foundational elements certainly have what it takes, so for me, it all boils down to characters and execution. If they can't flesh out the personalities on the show, or if the actors can't pull it off, they're doomed. I think they'll de-cheese the magic pretty quickly, so that's not really one of my main concerns. They've shown that they can make the magic come across incredibly well with Charlie, so it should only be a matter of time before that carries over to the rest of the cast. These niggling elements aside, I'm genuinely intrigued by the mythology of the series. I don't know what exactly happened in the past of why the parents are hell-bent on getting Cassie into their sights, but I'd like to. Where the story goes with this will ultimately determine how invested I become, but for now, my interests have been piqued, even in spite of some weaker aspects in the pilot.

All in all, I'm cautiously optimistic. While in my heart of hearts I'm hoping The Secret Circle is a companion to The Vampire Diaries in terms of starting off weak and then becoming insanely awesome, that's a hell of bar. Being as Damon-less as they are, I'm not sure they have any real possibility of rising to those heights, but I still think the show has enough going for it that it could really draw me in in the long run. If they can casually 86 the cheesier aspects and develop the characters, we could have a winner on our hands down the road, even in spite of the Britt Robertson of it all. Seriously, why are people casting her?

Pilot Grade: C+

Book Review: Mechanique

2011-09-15T11:36:00.006-06:00

I know this blog generally focuses on television, my first love, but I actually read a fair bit as well. Most don't warrant a full send-up, but Mechanique: A Tale of the Circus Tresaulti most certainly does. I decided to give it a whirl after reading a review on AV Club and I couldn't be more pleased with the results. I won't go into my usual 15 page dissection of every single element, but rather, simply post the fairly succinct (for me) assessment that I wrote for Amazon.

Even before I finished it, I was desperate to read it again...

This is, quite simply, the best book I've read in a long time. I honestly didn't know what to expect when I picked it up, responding more to cover art than anything else, but wow, this was a shockingly wonderful surprise. This isn't a quick, easy read, and I mean that in the best possible way. The author uses this dark, brutal novel as an exercise in storytelling, narrative tropes, and reader involvement. Section to section, this story is told from every conceivable point of view, including first person, several instances of third person limited, and most surprising of all, second person. They all interlace to give the reader a well-rounded experience while he or she picks up clues and details and subtle nuances to compose a full picture of what really happened and why. In a weird way, it almost felt like the televisions series Lost at times, where the author would tell me something, then later on, I'd get the same event from a different perspective which would shed an entirely new light on what happened. I felt like a collector of brutal details and nuanced reveals as I read this book, desperate for every single tidbit. I read this book very slowly and even before I had finished it the first time, I wanted to read it again. It's the kind of book that you could read 5 times and pick up something new with every read.

Best of all, in conjunction with Valentine's unconventional narrative approach, her language is completely engrossing. Her words wash over you before you can fully comprehend their full impact. I got so immersed that when a line would come along that cut to the bone, it felt like I had to come up for air for a moment and really process what she'd said. I read somewhere that this book is like a punch in the gut, in the best possible way. I couldn't agree more. Each line is powerful and incisive without being overwrought or forced. Valentine doesn't foist some florid picture on readers using $10 words just because she can. She simply states things exactly the way they are, in the most searing and powerful way possible.

By the end of the book I was completely invested in every single character, even ones that I didn't think would factor into the story in a substantive way when I started. These aren't simply characters with simple motives. Valentine doesn't spoonfeed their agendas or thought processes. Even when you think you know why they are doing what they're doing, the truth is layered and murky in a way that keeps you on your toes, parsing each and every line for illuminating subtext. It's strange, all the while you're unsure of their motivations, all their actions make perfect sense in their own twisted way.

There are a million things I could say about this book, but to put it mildly, I'm in love. I don't think this is the kind of book everyone will love, but I think if this is the kind of book you respond to, you'll REALLY respond to it.

As a final sidenote, I have to point out that the representations of women in the novel are compelling and dark and strong. I am keenly attuned to representations of women in fiction and this is one of the few cases in which I was not only pleased, but thrilled. The women in this novel aren't perfect or impervious by any stretch, but they have enough layers that their flaws seem like far more than narrative ploys.

I don't often review books on Amazon, but I couldn't help but to write a love letter to Genevieve Valentine and her wonderful tale. I like a book that challenges me and this was a challenge in the most satisfying of ways. Kudos!

TV Review: Up All Night and Free Agents

2011-09-15T07:51:00.007-06:00

As per usual, NBC swung and missed last night with a pair of new pilots. At least for me. Last night was an unfortunate instance of a good show that doesn't have an appealing concept and a bad show that does. Sigh.

UP ALL NIGHT

Starring the always lovely and funny Christina Applegate and Arrested Development alum Will Arnett, Up All Night should have been a home run. For a lot of viewers, I'm guessing it absolutely was. It has a great cast and was well made. That said, I am quite happily single and childless and the show's concept held very little appeal for me and hardly any laughs. Will and Christina brought a lot of warmth and energy to their roles as slightly-bumbling, but adoring new parents, but the proposed hilarity of tending to a crying baby all night was lost on me. I'm sure for people who've been through the trials and tribulations of new parenthood this show was a sheer delight, but for me? Well, honestly, I was incredibly bored. The pilot had its moments, and elicited a few smiles from me, but overall, this just isn't the kind of show I'm going to love, and that's okay. It doesn't make it a bad show just because it's not my kind of show. That said, I'm hearing rumors that Maya Rudolph's character role is being expanded and that Will Arnett's will probably be the one to take a fair bit of the hit. Arnett is a showkiller, to be sure, but I'd still prefer to see more of him than Maya (not that I don't like Maya, but a little goes a long way). In short, this just isn't my cup of tea, which isn't to say that the tea was poorly made. I'll give it another week to branch out in terms of storyline, but if it's still as baby-centric as the pilot, I'm pretty sure I won't last long. You never know though. I quite enjoy Raising Hope, but that has way more to do with Martha Plimpton and Garret Dillahunt than with the baby. Both shows just make me surer and surer that I never ever want to have children. Cautionary tales.

Pilot Grade: C- (?)
(I honestly had a hard time assigning a grade because objectively, I could appreciate that it would appeal to a lot of people, but more importantly, it didn't really appeal to me...)

FREE AGENTS

On the other side of the spectrum, we have a fairly horrible show that has a concept that's much more appealing to me, even if the show itself isn't. I didn't hate this one as much as most critics out there, but I didn't much enjoy it either. The show focuses on a man and woman who are both reeling from their past relationships (a recent divorce for him, a dead fiance for her) and who find each other. On the surface, it sounds pretty decent, but in execution, it was pretty unfortunate. It had a few moments that were charming, but all in all, the show itself seemed to think it was a lot funnier than the viewing audience. The most painfully unfunny scene of the pilot included Hank Azaria's character making up names of sexual positions amid the roaring laughter of his coworkers. Yeah, not that funny. At all, in fact. It wasn't even crude. It was just lame. I spent the better part of the show wishing these actors that I like (or in Anthony Head's case, absolutely LOVE) were in a far better show. Oh, Giles. You can do so much better. Really, the biggest laugh for me was the fact that the female lead opposite Hank Azaria was named Helen. That's kind of sad. Overall, the characters simply weren't very funny or likeable and the chemistry between the two leads was lacking. When a show is based around said chemistry, and said chemistry is lacking, that show is in trouble. I don't really have much desire to get to know these characters better, but I might give it another week just to see if the writers of the show saw what I saw and made some major adjustments. I'm always torn when it comes to a Whedonverse alum finding him/herself in a dud. On the one hand, I want them to succeed, but on the other, rather larger hand, I want their show to tank so they can move on to bigger and better things. Sigh.

Pilot Grade: D+

TV Review: Ringer

2011-09-14T11:30:00.004-06:00

It seems that every pilot season a couple of shows come down the pike that have similar set-ups. This season, it seems that all the pilots got together and paired off ahead of time, making sure that not only will the show be compared to all the other new shows in a general way, but that they'd be ridiculed in a one-to-one comparison with their doppelganger. Or should I say dead ringer...

To be fair, I honestly don't think the brass behind the CW's new show Ringer or the creative team behind ABC Family's new series The Lying Game had any idea of the other's existence. Indeed, the similarities are more basic than overwhelming, but the conceits are similar enough that each suffers in its own way by comparison.

Ringer stars Sarah Michelle Geller in her return to television, having been conspicuously inconspicuous since Buffy went off the air ages ago. The series revolves around identical twin sisters Bridget and Siobahn, both of whom apparently have a lot more to worry about than some unfortunate split-screening. In a nutshell, Bridget is a screw-up on the run who, after Siobahn seemingly kills herself, assumes her sister's identity in order to evade capture and live the good life. All is not well in the house of Siobahn, however, and Bridget soon realizes that her sister's marriage is a sham, she's having an affair with her friend's husband, and most importantly, that she seems to be in more peril than Bridget ever was. On the surface, the show has more than a little in common with The Lying Game, whose switcheroo also involves sham relationships, torrid affairs, and a heroine hiding from the law, but in terms of tone and ongoing narrative, I think the two shows will separate themselves from one another quickly and thoroughly.

While that sounds like a good thing for the viewers themselves, I think it may cause problems for Ringer in terms of viewership overall. Among other things. I don't want to get too far off on a tangent, but it's impossible to talk about Ringer without talking about the CW as a network and it's rivalry with ABC Family. Okay, rivalry is a bit of a stretch, but when it all boils down, both networks have the same key demographic (younger females), but against all of the CW's expectations, ABC Family is coming out the clear winner. In theory, the CW counts as a network and is available to more homes and should garner higher ratings. In reality, however, ABC Family does far better than the CW in a number of regards, not just in terms of ratings (which, when weighted against the fact that ABC Family is cable, is pretty substantial). This all matters because Ringer appears to be a bit off-brand for the CW, focusing on older characters in an off-puttingly heavy-handed, joyless way, which I don't think will appeal to their key demographic the way that The Lying Game has. Ringer was initially pitched to CBS, but they, quite rightly, passed on it. I actually think in terms of branding it would have fit in at CBS a bit better than the CW (in terms of tone alone, I can see Ringer pairing with CBS' line-up better), but at the end of the day, the pilot simply wasn't very strong and I'm not surprised in the least that it ended up on the red-headed step child of the major networks.

I wanted to love this pilot. I really did. My love for the Whedonverse knows no bounds, and true Buffy fans have been pulling for SMG to make her triumphant return for years. I don't think Ringer marks said return... To be fair, I didn't hate the pilot, but I certainly didn't love it either. How much of that has to do with my love for Buffy is up for debate. My friend Annie, who has no such unyielding devotion hated the pilot. I honestly don't know how I would have found it were I in similar shoes, but I know that Buffy had a lot to do with what enjoyment I felt. Oddly, she also had a lot to do with my major issues with the show.

The base conceit depends on viewers suspending their disbelief to the point of believing that Bridget and Siobahn are two different people, not just Sarah Michelle Geller with slightly different hair and clothes. Much like The Lying Game, the production uses camera tricks and overtly convenient set-ups to try to convince viewers that there are actually two people involved. The difference with Ringer is that the star of the show is an actual star. Being unfamiliar with the lead actress in The Lying Game, it was honestly pretty easy to suspend my disbelief and buy into the gambit that she's really two people. With Buffy? I just didn't buy it. I know her too well and have watched her for too many years to casually and immediately believe that she's two people. I think I could have grown to this point over time, but in its pilot episode, Ringer simply didn't earn it. It didn't establish these two women in a way that I felt like I truly knew either of them, so to see Bridget take over Siobahn's life was neither jarring nor suspenseful. I honestly didn't care if Bridget fooled people. I didn't care that she might be exposed, and didn't feel tense and nervous at the threat that she might make a mistake. In short, I wasn't invested enough in either sister to care that they were both in mortal danger. I'm no executive, but when "mortal danger" is met with "meh" by the viewing audience, you're in trouble. Maybe it's just me, but I really didn't feel the gravity of the situation they were in.

For all its faults, and believe me, there are a lot of them, The Lying Game has proven more successful. A big part of that is the fact that it started airing several weeks ago and was allowed to be the launchpoint rather than the follow-up. This is why you don't want your show to be super-similar to another show. Even if you might have come out okay against other shows en masse ("Well, you can't really compare Ringer to [insert other show here] because they're just so different..."), when stacked up against its twin sister, one is always the victor. The reason The Lying Game works better (which isn't to say it works completely) is that it embraces the silliness of its concept and rolls with it. Even at its most dire, it doesn't take itself too seriously. It seems to know that its a cheesy soap opera more bent on crazy plot twists than on in-depth character development, and knows how to handle that. Ringer, by contrast, seems to be blithely unaware that it's almost painfully overwrought, dour, and sullenly melodramatic, honestly thinking that it's delivering a gripping, cerebral drama. It is not. It's too earnest to really luxuriate in its concept and too soapy to be earnest.

I think the problems with Ringer are mostly found in the execution. If you're going to have a show be this serious and sobering, you have to earn it. Ringer doled out grave conversations, suicide, and moral and ethical issues left and right, shoving a lot of information and heaviness at viewers, but without establishing a world where I'm hit the way I should be by that kind of thing. The split-screening was nowhere near as successful as they were hoping and the production value just wasn't high enough to convince me that any of this is really happening or that any of it really matters. Far and away the worst offense came at a time when I should have been the most grieved and upset. How do you undercut the tragic suicide of Siobahn? Put her on the fakest fake boat to ever sail the ocean blue(screen), complete with, I assume, random production assistants teetering the boat back and forth and splashing Buffy and Buffy's boat with buckets of water. Don't believe me? Take a look. It honestly felt like how a late night talk show would produce the scene. I half expected a rubber fish to hit one of the Buffys in the face. It was ridiculous to the point of being hilariously bad. This is where execution can kill a show (heh). You can't have a show with forced gravitas when the audience is expecting rubber fish at any moment. A show can easily get around poor production values if they know what they're doing, but as the pilot wore on, it became clearer and clearer than the folks behind Ringer might not. Shows like Buffy and Angel and Doctor Who can get away with bad special effects because they've earned it. They infused enough humor and warmth into their shows and forged characters that the audiences loved enough that all was forgiven. You can overlook just about anything if the show has found its way into viewers' hearts. Hell, with a show you really love, you can watch darling characters working with a bare stage and tin can, if need be. You believe the big moments because you believe in the characters. The set might be terrible, the make-up unconvincing, and even the storyline can be weak or convoluted, but the audience has the characters to hang on to. They've earned such concessions from the viewers, sometimes in only a matter of minutes ( I think about how quickly I fell in love with Nurse Jackie and Damon Salvatore that it's hard to argue for more time). Seriously, for beloved shows to be doing this scene, they could just be sitting in a cardboard box that said "BOAT" on the front and you'd be more than happy to go with it. With a show you don't really care about, the fake boat is all you see. With Ringer, I didn't have beloved characters to latch onto, so the other problems were far more glaring than they should have been.

When it all boils down, I think Ringer just played its hand the wrong way. Instead of relishing its concept and needling viewers with tantalizing intrigue, it came across as oppressively, and unconvincingly, serious. I'm all for a serious drama, but this just didn't work very well. It just seemed to be trying so hard all the time. Hell, it even did that annoying beyond annoying thing where the show starts out in the middle of the action then pulls back to "nine days earlier" or some shit. I hate that ploy 9 times out of 10. For every episode that makes it work (there was an episode of Castle and an episode of CSI that both used this trope at its best), you get a pilot that uses that technique as a crutch, not an asset. The pilot opens on Bridget being attacked by an intruder in an unfinished apartment. At that point, I don't know this character and I don't care about her. What I do know is that in her old role, she should be kicking this guy's ass. I've explained my issues with the "three days earlier" trope in the past (not that I can find the link now or anything), but brass tacks, it almost never works for a pilot. And it didn't work for me here.

This review makes the pilot sound unbearably painful to watch, but really, it was just underwhelming. I wanted to love it so much, and just didn't. Maybe my expectations were simply too high. Sarah does as decent a job as she can with weak writing. She can turn on the waterworks like nobody's business, but a gut-wrenching phonecall to her sponsor just isn't all that gut-wrenching when you don't really care about the characters involved. They didn't earn that moment. (In related news, the "they have to earn it" dead horse has officially been beaten.) Bridget's romantic entanglements were hardly as engaging as they should have been and are barely even worth mentioning here. I simply didn't care at this point and I'm not totally sure I want them to in the future.

It's weird. I always say that you have to give a show a few episodes before you can really know if it's worth your time or not. It usually takes a few episodes to really invest in the characters and storylines, so I try not to judge a pilot too harshly on my initial investment alone. But then I think of the pilots that hooked me immediately (Alias, Nurse Jackie, Lone Star) and it's hard to completely dismiss the problems with a show like Ringer. Sure it could grow on me over time the way other shows have, but with this one, I'm a lot less certain than I have been in the past. It's a good cast and most of them made the clunky dialogue work as well as they could, but I there was very little to really invest in. I don't need my characters to be universally likeable (indeed, many of my favorite characters are completely contemptible), but from the pilot alone, I don't feel like I have a bead on anyone. Indeed, Richard Alpert (er, Nestor Carbonell) had the most engaging character and he had one of the smallest roles and random best friend character Gemma was more charming than anyone else on the show. I guess what it really comes down to is that I might not invest in characters right away on a lot of shows, but I want to know more. With Ringer? I'm not so sure.

I'll certainly be giving Ringer a few more episodes to grab me, but I'm not particularly hopeful. While a part of me really did enjoy the ham-fisted melodrama and histrionics (half expecting a 1930's radio announcer to tell me to tune in next time), I'm just not sure Ringer will find its way into my heart. There just wasn't enough balance among the show's elements. All the while I expected the radio announcer, at the same time, the pacing was so slow and the twists so obvious that it hardly merits such a send-up. Perhaps I knew too much about this show going in, but I saw that major twists telegraphed ages prior. The show didn't seem to be able to find a niche and work with it. It's trying to be a sobering drama, a sudsy soap opera, a thriller, and a romance all at once and is suffering as a result. In more capable hands, such a combination is certainly possible, but the writing, production value, and narrative approach here simply weren't strong enough for even the finest of actors to overcome. The pilot had a few nice moments, and some good bones to work with thanks in large part to a talented cast, but those got lost in the shuffle of overly-dramatic narcotics anonymous meeting and the like.

All in all, I'm pretty bummed. This pilot had a lot of things going for it, but didn't follow-through. I'm hoping it turns out to be this season's Vampire Diaries, starting off weak, then picking up steam, but I doubt it. As the pilot for TVD was coming to an end in rather underwhelming fashion, Damon showed up and suddenly I was intrigued. The pilot wasn't great, but I wanted to know more. With Ringer, I feel obligated to know more because of the cast and the promise of Logan Echolls making an appearance, but I'm not chomping at the bit for next week by any stretch. I'm guessing the show will open strong in the ratings department, based on love from the Whedonverse, but unless it really picks up its game and finds its feet, I'm not sure it'll hold up in the long-run. I honestly didn't hate the pilot, in spite of its flaws, but there wasn't a lot to applaud either. It's weird. I watched the whole pilot and wasn't horribly bored or desperate for it to end or anything, seemingly enjoying myself well enough, but at the same time, when I try to express what I liked about it, I can't really come up with much. First and last, I don't really want to get to know Bridget better, and as the main character of the show, that's a problem. We'll see how it goes in the coming weeks, but I'm not sure even my most ardent Whedon allegiance will save this one for me.

Pilot Grade: C-
(seriously, based on this review, you'd think F, but I genuinely didn't hate it, even if I can't come up with much to love about it either--it was just kind of... there)

TV Review: New Girl

2011-09-08T12:45:00.008-06:00

I used to force myself to come up with more creative titles than the one above, but lo and behold, I suck at it and they usually don't make any sense. As such, this year, it's going to be pretty straight-forward and lame in the title department. I'm sure you're heartbroken.

Anyway... I watched Fox's new pilot New Girl on iTunes the other day even though it doesn't actually premiere until the 20th. If only all shows did this...

New Girl stars Zooey Deschanel as a heartbroken goofball who needs to find a new apartment after finding her boyfriend shacking up with another girl. In typical sitcom fashion, she moves in with an unlikely trio of single guys. Wackiness ensues. There's nothing earth-shattering or innovative about the setup of this comedy, but that doesn't mean it doesn't have potential. It was well-made and competently written, if not awe-inspiring or anything. At the end of the day, however, brass tacks, whether or not you love or hate this show is dependent on one sole factor: whether or not you love or hate Zooey Deschanel (and no, I'm not going to look up her last name to check the spelling). As with any star vehicle, the star is question is the number one variable to consider. Based on the fact that most people seem to think Zooey is just the most adorable actress on the planet, I suspect New Girl will do very well in the ratings department, even if, as I found, the pilot was lacking in several areas.

First and foremost, I should disclose my bias against Zooey. I don't hate her exactly, but I honestly don't see what all the fuss is about. She comes across to me as very one-note and doesn't seem to have the range needed to carry a show. I enjoy a fair bit of quirk to my favorite characters, but hers is an all-consuming flavor that overpowers everything else. Rather than finding her clumsiness, marble-mouthed-iness, social ineptitude, and childlike jejune endearing, I find her to be relentlessly and almost oppressively quirky. As with Sheldon Cooper, that level of consistent idiosyncrasy goes a very, very long way and I'm just not sure I want to see it anchoring a show. She makes up and sings songs for random events, she can't dress herself, she dances like a goofball, she's inelegant and awkward around men, she seems to have no concept of shame, and has an omni-present juvenile innocence that makes her only barely capable of navigating adult social situations. Really, that's a conservative list. It makes for a lot to endure on an ongoing basis. I quite enjoy offbeat elements to characters, but I'm just not sure I can handle every offbeat element ever attributed to anyone since the dawn of time all rolled into one. I have a sinking feeling it'll get real old real fast unless they flesh out her character with some actual depth in the coming episodes. As much as I'd like that to be the case, I fear the writers will be banking on her awkwardness for most of their comic beats. The pilot had some charming moments, but the prospect of watching Zooey be Zooey week-in and week-out is fairly off-putting. Again, if you love her, you'll love this show. If you don't love her, you'll probably fall off the wagon after a few episodes.

The pilot wasn't a disaster by any stretch, but it wasn't a laugh riot either. I actually found myself enjoying the show more and more as it went on, and found Zooey's over-the-top affectations to be less annoying as the pilot progressed, but I don't think I actually laughed even once. I'd place this show in the category of "pleasant" more than anything else. Sure I smiled from time to time and found the supporting cast to be capable and likeable enough to make the pilot successful, but it just didn't have the comedic punch I was hoping for. Indeed, the moments I found the funniest seemed to be afterthoughts and quiet throwaways rather than the writers showing me their A-game. Things like putting a dollar in the "Douchebag Jar" for eye-rollingly tacky comments, listening to the guys serenade Zooey with "I've Had the Time of My Life" from Dirty Dancing, and seeing her overflowing with awkwardness at every turn were on the main stage here, but it was the little things thrown in that actually charmed me the most. My two favorite moments were probably missed by 95% of the viewing audience. My favorite line in the pilot was when Zooey (her character's name is Jess, for the record) is being hit on by a buy at the bar as he says, "I like your glasses," to which she responds, "Thanks. They help me see." Not that original, granted, but it worked. It wasn't so much the line itself as Zooey's delivery, which was spot on and restrained for once. Other than that, the best moment for me was, after being kicked out of a restaurant, Zooey grabs the piece of whole wheat bread from the basket, the same piece she had complained about earlier. It was hardly even noticeable on screen, but that was my favorite moment. I'm not sure how the bodes for the show as a whole...

All in all, it was... fine. There wasn't enough good there to rave about and there wasn't enough bad to warrant a rant. It had its charms, and I think over time it could turn into something more substantial, but from the pilot alone, I can't say I'm clamoring for more. I have a very crowded viewing schedule and "it was enjoyable enough I suppose" just doesn't cut it these days. That said, I'll be giving it a few more episodes to find its feet of course. In a perfect world, this show will become much more of an ensemble than the pilot would let on and it won't simply be "The Zooey Show" 24 hours a day. Damon Wayans Jr.'s character had to be recast (this show was in second position to his gig on Happy Endings, which I'm guessing he's pretty pissed got picked up because I have a feeling New Girl might be the new "it show" of the season, whereas Happy Endings barely survived the axe), so the show will look a fair bit different once it's re-shot, I'm guessing. In terms of my enjoyment of the pilot, it was actually supporting player Jake M. Johnson who proved to be the real star of the show for me, adding a much-needed calm and sober presence on a show frothing over with quirky. He struck a much warmer, more engaging, and much nicer balance between zany and real than any of the other characters and left me with the wish that he were the actual star, not just the one in my book. If the show can build up enough of an ensemble like him though, even all the Zooey in the world might be tempered. Might be. I have a feeling they may be positing his character as a potential love interest for Zooey though, so in spite of the fact that he can clearly do better, it will likely make him more of a focus in the future.

I may not have walked away from this pilot with a newfound appreciation of Zooey Deschanel, but I didn't walk away completely annoyed either. That's progress for me. Overall it was a pleasant, occasionally endearing pilot, if not the most memorable. The opening theme was probably the worst part, which in terms of a show's longevity, is far from the worst that could happen... More than anything for me sadly, the takeaway from this pilot was the dejected realization that I was going to be stuck on "I've Had the Time of My Life" for the next several days. Thanks a lot, show. Hopefully the more irritating elements will fall by the wayside, however, because for as much as I don't love Zooey, I think this show will do well and has some definite potential down the road.

Pilot Grade: B- (or whatever the letter equivalent of "meh" is)

Upcoming Premiere Dates

2011-09-06T11:50:00.004-06:00

Finally, finally, finally, September is upon us. While network TV is mostly disappointing most of the time, I can't not get excited for the crush of fall pilots. Sure most of them won't survive the year (or even through Christmas), but every year I jump in with both feet and hope for the best. Some years are better than others (2004 and 2007 were particularly good as I recall). This fall is looking pretty mediocre, I must say, but still looks a fair bit more promising than last season. Honestly though, it's midseason that looks promising for new programming. For fall, I'm mostly stoked for returning shows. Three months without The Vampire Diaries, The Good Wife, Nikita, and Castle is simply too damn long. "Well, hello, dead ex-girlfriends!" Fade to black. Meeeean.

Anyway, here's the day by day on when shows are starting. Showtimes are subject to timezones and I'm simply not willing to parse that out here. Please note that times are subject to change, but with the new season starting next week, the September premieres are pretty set in stone. Beyond that, it's hard to be sure.

The list below is kind of daunting, so if you want it in calendar format, our good friend Michael Ausiello has graciously generated one HERE.

***SEPTEMBER***

Tuesday, September 13

Parenthood (NBC)
Ringer (CW)
90210 (CW)

Wednesday, September 14

Survivor (CBS)
H8R (CW)
America's Next Top Model (CW)
Up All Night (NBC)
Free Agents (NBC)

Thursday, September 15

The Vampire Diaries (CW) Wooo!
The Secret Circle (CW)
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX)
Archer (FX)

Monday, September 19

Dancing with the Stars (ABC)
How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 2 episodes)
Two and a Half Men (CBS, if you're curious enough to tune in for Ashton)
2 Broke Girls (CBS)
Castle (ABC)
Hawaii Five-O (CBS)
The Playboy Club (NBC)

Tuesday, September 20

NCIS (CBS)
Glee (Fox)
The Biggest Loser (NBC)
Dancing with the Stars results show (ABC)
NCIS: Los Angeles (CBS)
New Girl (Fox)
Raising Hope (Fox)
Body of Proof (ABC)
Unforgettable (CBS)

Wednesday, September 21

The X Factor (Fox)
The Middle (ABC, one hour)
Criminal Minds (CBS)
Modern Family (ABC)
Harry's Law (NBC)
CSI (CBS)
Law & Order: SVU (NBC)
Revenge (ABC)

Thursday, September 22

The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 2 episodes)
Charlie's Angels (ABC)
The X Factor results (Fox)
Community (NBC)
Parks and Rec (NBC)
Grey's Anatomy (ABC, 2 hour premiere)
Person of Interest (CBS)
The Office (NBC)
Whitney (NBC)
The Mentalist (CBS)
Prime Suspect (NBC)

Friday, September 23

Kitchen Nightmares (Fox)
Nikita (CW)
A Gifted Man (CBS)
CSI: NY (CBS)
Fringe (Fox)
Supernatural (CW)
Blue Bloods (CBS)

Sunday, September 25

The Amazing Race (CBS)
The Simpsons (Fox)
The Cleveland Show (Fox)
Desperate Housewives (ABC)
The Good Wife (CBS) Wooo!
Boardwalk Empire (HBO)
Family Guy (Fox)
American Dad (Fox)
Pan Am (ABC)
CSI: Miami (CBS)

Monday, September 26

Terra Nova (Fox)
Gossip Girl (CW)
Hart of Dixie (CW)
Mike & Molly (CBS)

Wednesday, September 28

Suburgatory (ABC)
Happy Endings (ABC)

Thursday, September 29

How To Be a Gentleman (CBS)
Private Practice (ABC)

***OCTOBER***

Sunday, October 2

Dexter (Showtime)
Homeland (Showtime)
Hung (HBO)
How to Make It in America (HBO)
Ken Burns: Prohibition (PBS)

Monday, October 3

House (Fox)

Wednesday, October 5

American Horror Story (FX)
South Park (FX)

Thursday, October 6

The League (FX)

Monday, October 10

Bored to Death (HBO)
Enlightened (HBO)

Tuesday, October 11

Last Man Standing (ABC)

Wednesday, October 12

Psych (USA)

Sunday, October 16

The Walking Dead (AMC)

Friday, October 21

Chuck (NBC)
Grimm (NBC)
Boss (Starz)

Sunday, October 23

Once Upon a Time (ABC)

***NOVEMBER***

Tuesday, November 1

Covert Affairs (USA)

Sunday, November 6

Hell on Wheels (AMC)

Thursday, November 3

Bones (Fox)
Burn Notice (USA)

Wednesday, November 23

I Hate My Teenage Daughter (Fox)

Beyond that, the dates for shows are pretty foggy. Midseason is always kind of up for grabs (depending on how and when other shows get the axe), but here are the shows you can look forward to around January or February of 2012, with some tentative premiere dates included for some... No particular order...

Shameless (Showtime--January 8th)
House of Lies (Showtime--January 8th)
Southland (TNT--January 17th)
Smash (ABC--February 6th)
Apartment 23
Cougar Town
Good Christian Bitches/Belles
Missing
The River
Scandal
Work It
The 2-2
Undercover Boss
Alcatraz
American Idol
The Finder
Touch
30 Rock
Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Awake
Bent
Best Friends Forever
The Firm
The Voice
The Frame
One Tree Hill
Re-Modeled

Line Item Raves and Nods to Not-bad-ishness

2011-09-02T21:00:00.001-06:00

As mentioned in the previous post, there's been a lot to be disappointed by lately. I didn't even include my recent weariness with Burn Notice, but it's there. It's still better than many shows out there, so it got a pass, but I have to admit, the formula is really getting to me these days. I used to be able to "just go with it," but lately, I can predict with frightening accuracy at what minute the "twist that makes it look like the plan won't work" is going to happen. Sigh.

Amid the mediocrities and disappointments though, there really are some winners that I should give their due, whether they fall into the stellar category or the "well, that was a lot better than expected" category.

Here are my recent raves:

SUITS

I decided I was in love with this show (as well as with Gabriel Macht, who, after the dramatic improvement in his hair, warrants a poster above my bed) several episodes ago and I've been very pleased to find that it holds up. So often, I'll decide I'm in love just in time for the next episode to suck. Not so with Suits. Each episode is solid on its own, but altogether, they're making for a cohesive, driven, thoroughly entertaining freshman year. Unlike so many USA shows, the writers for Suits have a clear purpose in mind and defined character arcs to explore. This isn't your typical procedural where all but little tidbits of personal life and ongoing "big bad" get reset at the end of the hour. Indeed, after their last stellar outing, which sets up the season finale in fine, nail-biting form, my mom actually said, "So... it just continues next week?" I cheekily gave her a hard time saying, "Yep, television shows tend to air week-to-week," but I knew what she meant. It points to the best part of the show. It's serialized. It's not as serialized as more hard-hitting dramas like Breaking Bad or Justified, but it's far more of a serial than anything else USA has ever attempted. That points USA in the right direction, gives them a broader brand with which to work, and clearly improves the quality of this new series. I hope the unmitigated success of the show tells USA to do more of this in the future, because it's working. Thursday's offering was intense and twisty and layered in a way I just don't expect from this network. By the end of the hour, I was in no way certain that everything would work out just fine next week. I'm wagering it will, but the fact that there's even a chance in my mind that it could possible not resolve itself is a hell of a step in the right direction. Best of all? Mike finally called Rachel on her shit and threw her petty sexual politics in her face. Yeah, that's right, missy, you ignored him for months and blew him off until it was too late. Deal with it. (I'm not much of a Rachel fan, so that confrontation had me twiddling my fingers in Mr. Burns' fashion of diabolical glee.)

ROOKIE BLUE

Yes, that's right. Rookie Blue. I initially wrote this show off as Grey's Anatomy with Cops, and to large extent, it still is, but the more annoying elements of season 1 (the voiceover, Ephram's characterization, the forced will-they-or-won't-they-ishness) have morphed into a thoroughly enjoyable show that ups the ante every chance it gets. It's a light show, very easy to watch, but it's not devoid of substance. A lot of that substance is squishy, squee-worthy relationship stuff, but a lot of it is people getting shot too. They actually maintain a pretty nice balance. The will-they-or-won't-they-ishness is still there, but it's way more fun to watch because I like the characters involved so much more. Ephram has settled into the role and is actually pretty fabulous now, and they dropped the stupid, sanctimonious voiceover entirely. On top of that, the show is a lot more exciting this time around. Geez, who knew Canada was so dangerous? One of the main characters gets shot in the chest in the premiere for hell's sakes. Pretty freaking fantastic. This used to be the kind of show that I didn't tell people I watched it because it was a tad embarrassing, but I've always secretly enjoyed it will enough. This season however, I'm out and proud. It's a hell of a lot of fun and is actually pretty damn funny a lot of the time. In one episode, Andy, the main girl, is undercover as a car saleswoman (salesperson?). When asked about the engine, she peers under the hood, deer in the headlights, but goes for it with, "Dual..." And that's it. Hehe. I busted up. Her line delivery is what really sells it. Anyhow, I have found myself looking forward to it week-to-week and have saved the whole season on my DVR. That's right, I'll admit it.

BREAKING BAD

This show quite simply kicks ass. It's absolutely amazing and is far and away one of the most intelligent, adult, well-written shows on air. It's also one of the darkest. If you're looking to get caught up, be forewarned. It's not the kind of show that you can burn through 5 episodes in a day. It's incredibly dark a lot of the time and very cerebral. It doesn't spoonfeed and it doesn't pull punches. This show is more terrifying and exhilarating in its quiet moments than most shows are when buildings are exploding. This whole season has been about quiet, but earth-shattering shifts in power and I can't wait for more. As Jesse becomes the new Walt and Walt slowly turns into Jesse, all hell is breaking loose around them. It's, quite simply, gripping. If you've seen the show, you know. If you haven't, I couldn't possibly do it justice with a random paragraph on a blogpost. So I'mza gonna stop tryin'.

Those three shows are the real standouts in a summer of burnouts, but there are some honorable mentions as well.

Here are my nods to not-bad-ishness (oh, it's a word):

AGAINST THE WALL

I'm as shocked as you are. I'm still not entirely sure why I gave this one a shot, but I did, and I've been pleasantly surprised. I don't even think that's the impossibly low standards talking either. The fact that it's a largely procedural cop show wasn't doing my initial perceptions any favors, but knowing it was on Lifetime, Television for Women... Who Really Love Stories About Unfaithful Husbands Getting Murdered, was probably the biggest bias-creator. To my surprise, it's actually a very warm, funny little show about a woman who works in Internal Affairs. I'm no fan of cops in general (my admiration for Rookie Blue notwithstanding), so the thought of a show about a cop who nails other cops for being terrible at their jobs or just downright dirty has its appeal. More than anything though, it's about the interpersonal relationships among the main character's family, her friends, and how being the cop of cops affects her life. It's not perfect, and it's hardly top tier, but I'm enjoying it. It's well-made and charming in its own way. It has its issues (chief among them the annoying-as-hell realism in fiction that strong women have to have some sort of ridiculous foible (usually ridiculous levels of clumsiness) so that they can be vulnerable), but it has really grown on me. If the subject matter and overall treatment were more up my alley, I think I'd be quite the fan. As is, why not.

ALPHAS

I gave the pilot a lukewarm, yet mostly hopeful review and I'm pleased to say it has turned into a nice little show. Their most recent episode (the obligatory "everyone has been bewitched by a cult leader" episode) was by no means their best outing, but on the whole, it's a pretty good show. It's entirely too procedural for me to really get sucked in entirely, but that has more to do with me than the show. It taps into Sci Fi tropes without going overboard (usually) and that allows it to stay pretty grounded, while still interesting. I think my main hang-up is that I'm having a hard time really getting attached to the characters, but they're growing on me. It's been slow to find its way into my heart, but I think it'll get there eventually. They teased an overall mythology that they should pay more attention to and if at all possible, phase out the procedural aspect. If they could just do that, I'd be sold. As is, it's good enough to keep me going, and I'm enjoying it far more than I expected I would, but it's not yet living up to its full potential.

AWKWARD.

MTV doesn't exactly have the best track record for original programming, so imagine my surprise when this show caught my attention. I've seen 6 or 7 episodes, and while it has its moments, I can't quite decide if I really like it. That said, I keep watching, so it must have something that keeps me coming back. It's more ribald and raunchy that my usual fare, but the main character is female and that manages to keep it from being cliche most of the time. The lead actress does a really nice job and queen bee bitch is shockingly successful at making me want to punch her in the face, so the show must be doing something right. I can't say I'd recommend this show to everyone, but if you were at all interested but opted out assuming it would suck, it actually doesn't. Who'd have guessed?

Line Item Rants

2011-08-30T10:16:00.007-06:00

With the new fall season starting up in a few weeks, I've been taking it easy and haven't been posting very much in the last couple of weeks. Actually, as much as I'd like to think that "taking it easy" is the only reason, it is a distant second to the fact that there just hasn't been a whole lot to write about. There are plenty of shows in the summer these days (good lord, my Sundays are teeming with programs), but with a few exceptions, I've been underwhelmed. Nothing has really warranted its own 15 page post (front and back!), so here are some random thoughts on some random shows (several of which you probably didn't even know that I watch--oooh, the depths of television that I plumb when no one is looking...)

TRUE BLOOD

As mentioned in my recent query to Matt Roush, True Blood has been more entertaining this season than last, but that's not to say it isn't a complete mess at the same time. Don't get me wrong, I'll take just about anything over were-panthers, but the show is so unfocused, so sprawling, so haphazard that even the elements I'm enjoying are kind of driving me nuts lately. The vampires versus witches storyline has been entertaining, but it should be packing far more of a punch than it is. Why is it not hitting as hard as it should, you ask? Well, aside from the writing, which seems hell-bent on only raising the stakes so high as to be easy to manage, but more than anything, there are so many completely unrelated storylines being tossed in that the momentum gets quashed at every turn. We only have a couple of episodes left, so the tension should be blissfully, nail-bitingly unbearable, but at this point? Yep, those witches sure are causing some problems... Sigh. Every time they start to ratchet things up, we cut to some random event in the lives of Sam, Arlene, Tommy, Andy, Jessica, Debbie, and everyone else under the sun (or under the ground while the others are under the sun). I've complained before that the show needed to cut half the characters, but I'm feeling it now more than ever. It seems like every time the writers start to actually focus their attention on the primary story arc, I get hit in the face with 10 minutes of filler storylines that annoy the hell out of me. In and of themselves, I don't hate these characters, but when they're off on random tangents that take me away from the unholy apocalypse that should be drawing everyone's attention, it grates. I still enjoy the show, but it's a total mess. What few storylines it actually keeps an eye on (amid the hundreds) almost always fizzle out in the end or get completely forgotten. For as much as I hated the stupid, disgusting, ridiculous (in a bad way) were-panther crap, I kind of can't believe they just dropped it cold. On a purely selfish level, I'm thrilled that they realized what a colossal failure that was and casually wrote it out of the new season as quickly as possible, from a narrative standpoint, that was the biggest effing waste of time. They spent so much time and energy setting up all these people and their relationship with Jason and now what? Nothing? Hell, that situation only seems to have had the most superficial of effects on Jason, let alone the overall storyline of the show. I would hate for them to pop up in the future, but from a writer's perspective, I can't believe that was a throw-away. That's just one of the many, many storylines that suck, go nowhere, or ultimately mean nothing. From a show that I trusted more, I would know deep down that all the establishing stuff that's going on right now would mean something down the line, but with True Blood? They'll probably forget about all of it as soon as they get bored with it. Arlene's demon baby? Jason's blood-fueled affair with Jessica? Andy's V addiction? Sam in general? Alcide and Debbie's dysfunction? On a more reliable show, I could be assured that these tangential narratives would eventually build to something meaningful to the show as a whole, but here? Who the hell knows. They might just be a complete waste of time. Remember Russel Edgington, who, it was teased, would logically come back this season in some capacity? Sigh.

One the plus side, I'm pretty damn glad Eric is finally back. As much as I enjoyed his doe-eyed acting job, the Sookie-Eric relationship felt incredibly forced. That said, they do have some palpable chemistry, always have, and I kinda have to wonder how Stephen Moyer feels about all this... Probably the same way Bill feels, so, you know, he's working real hard this season. I'm intrigued to see how things play out now that Eric is back, but knowing True Blood, they'll probably drop the ball. This show has a whole lot to work with, but just gets distracted too easily. They need to pare down the cast, pick a central storyline to focus on, and build to a climax that is more central. The show isn't completely without merit, but at this point, I'd give it a C+ average. I get frustrated, but then it comes up with lines like, "I don't care what happens as long as I get to kill shit!" and it's hard to hold a grudge.

THE GLADES

This show has gone from third-tier "nothing else is on" filler to completely unwatchable. The cause? Kiele Sanchez, who, as far as I'm concerned, should be buried alive in real life, not just on Lost. God, she's unbearable. In her defense (just a tad), her unrelenting hate-ability has more than a little to do with the writing. On The Glades, she's just horrendous. It's a show that's clearly written by nothing but men who infuse drama into the show by relying on the irritating fallacy that "women are emotional and crazy" and very little else. Callie's every action, every comment, and every reaction is completely irrational and pissy, almost 100% of the time. That's annoying in and of itself, but when she's been posited as the "will they or won't they" love interest of the series, it's unbearable. Dear Show, NO ONE WANTS THEM TOGETHER. Hell, when Jim's ex showed up on the scene to act as an obstacle to the non-epic romance that is Jim and Callie, I speak for everyone I know who watches the show when I say, "Pick the new girl!!!!" She's gone now, much to my chagrin, but when the central romance on your show is the worst part of your show, you're in trouble. Next week Callie gets held at gunpoint by a patient at the hospital. I don't think I'm alone in hoping he suffers from a severe case of Itchy Trigger Finger. I'll be breaking up with this show after next week if she lives. (Oh, and now she's a "forensic nurse"??? WTF? Not only am I pretty sure that's just a ridiculous, made-up profession, the last thing this show needed was more Callie, so what do they do? Make her a pseudo-cop. Smooth. Real smooth.)

LEVERAGE

You know, it's hard to put this show in this category because, in and of itself, it's as good as it ever was. The real problem is that it was never very good. This is mainly because it has little to no over-arching storyline, the head of the team is practically unwatchable (seriously, anyone but Timothy Hutton would be an improvement), and the capers each week are pretty much exactly the same, only with different names. I'm no big fan of procedurals in general, but this one is driving me crazy these days. It's bad enough that it's the same people doing the same things every week with very little personal or emotional development, but it seems to be getting harder and harder for the writers to think up ways for each member of the team to be useful. Beyond that, what they come up with is getting less and less convincing. Sophie is an actractive woman, don't get me wrong, but she's not the head-turning vixen the show seems to think she is. Hate to break it to you, but relying on her wiles and sex appeal at every turn makes no sense whatsoever. The writing is just plain bad. Jesus, that episode where Hardison gets buried alive (because, you know, it's required to have such an episode at this point in a series) should have been a tour de force, and for Aldis Hodge's performance alone, it was one of the better episodes, but everything beyond him was laughable. The dialogue was cringe-worthily bad at every turn. I kept expecting wacky, mad cap music to cue up as people ran in and out of different doors down a long hallway. Awful. I need to break up with it, I really do, but I enjoy Hardison quite a lot and Parker has her charms. Everyone else can jump off a cliff. Man alive, the last time it went to commercial break with its standard, "You're watching Leverage, on TNT," I keep changing it in my head to, "You're watching Leverage, on TNT, and you don't know why." You're damn straight, mental re-write of standard advertising. As with most of the shows on this list, it could be so good, and yet, it just isn't.

IN PLAIN SIGHT

Okay, so In Plain Sight has already concluded its summer run, but it's still a disappointment. I realize that Mary MacCormack got knocked up in real life (which should be a fire-able offense when you're on this kind of show), but that does NOT mean you should write it into the storyline. Ever. I used to really love this show, but pregnant Mary was an epic fail in every possible regard. In my heart of hearts, I've been carrying a torch for Mary and Marshall to hook up, and her random, ridiculous pregnancy completely ruined their vibe this season. What's worse, there wasn't even the slightest suggestion of terminating the pregnancy as an option. It would be absolutely fine for Mary to be against abortion, and frankly, I think that could be consistent with her character's need to protect others, but then they should mention that. To not even put a throw-away line in there is absurd. A woman of her age, with a high risk, unwanted pregnancy would at least consider it as an option, and even if she didn't, everyone else certainly would. I was actually a little relieved when I heard that the show would be back for another season, but that that would be the final season, if for no other reason than the demoralizing prospect that she might actually keep the baby. She might not abort the baby, but she sure as hell wouldn't keep it, no matter how lazy the writers get. As with so many other ridiculous pregnancies on television, this one ruined the show. Even if you like children, you'd be hard-pressed to argue that it didn't ruin this show and Alias before it. It should be part of their contract that they can't get pregnant if they're on this kind of a show. How I Met Your Mother? No big deal. Action shows? Awful. I'm sorry, but when you're 8 months pregnant, you're not going to be chasing down bad guys... Oh wait, that's her job. And the entire foundation of the show. Seriously, people, this is not rocket science. Is it ridiculous to cover her huge pregnant belly with giant handbags and potted plants? Sure. Is it necessary? YES. Wow, she's a beautiful woman, but she's one of those women who seem to get pregnant with every fiber of their being. She looked unbelievably uncomfortable all season.

Every Dog Has His Degas

2011-08-11T15:00:00.004-06:00

I tell you what, wow! White Collar may have started off a little shaky for me in the first season, but these last two have been pretty damn impressive. Sure, there are the off episodes here or there or errant storyline that I could live without (*cough* Sarah and Neal's "romance" *cough*), but overall, I've been pleasantly surprised. Tuesday's midseason finale was incredibly suspenseful from beginning to end, pulling together several secondary storylines and tying them all together with the ongoing story arc.

First thing's first. Who all is glad beyond glad that we haven't had to listen to one word about that stupid music box or Kate this season? Everyone? Super. Man alive I'm enjoying the stolen Nazi art plotline better than the convoluted, only occasionally enthralling music box angle. Vast improvement. Given that I never liked or cared about Kate, I had a hard time really investing in the music box or Neal's inexplicable need to track down said bland and boring ex-girlfriend. I cared at all because Neal cared and I care about him. That said, the stakes just never seemed all that high. So you're saying, if he fails, we WON'T have to see Kate? Um, go Neal go? Yeah, no. I hate seeing Neal failing, but when the alternative is Kate von Vacanteyes, I'll take it. With the Nazi art, not only do we have a central item that's truly worth fighting for, but it brings a gravity and nail-biting suspense to every aspect of the show. If Neal fails now, he'll go back to prison, Peter will be devastated, Mozzie could be implicated, and the entire fiber of the show will collapse. Now those are high stakes.

USA Network is no stranger to finales (what with every show having three or four a year), but Tuesday's outing for White Collar was extremely good and could easily have served as a season ender instead. Procedural shows are at their best when the A-plot directly affects every other aspect of the show. My main quibble with procedurals is that they don't do this often enough, or when they do, they do it poorly. Not so with White Collar's most recent pulse-pounding, slick, efficient, well-structured caper. Kudos to that.

While I've always enjoyed the bromance between Peter and Neal, I've always chaffed at the idea that Neal would be such a compliant lap dog who would sell out his criminal friends and associates with such ease. Sure he does his own thing and gives Peter a hard time, but those incidents are almost always self-serving. I don't know, I guess it just always annoyed me that he would turn his back on his peeps so blithely. It's like there's no honor among thieves or something... Anyway, that's why this season has been so appealing to me. Neal is still as self-serving as ever, going so far as to lying to Mozzie of all people out of pure self-interest, but at least his roots are showing. The writers have done a lovely job this season exploring individual nature, turning a magnifying glass on whether or not people can change. Is Neal a con man through and through? Or has he really turned a new leaf? I've always come down on the side of Neal being the master criminal that we all know and love. In the back of my mind, I've always thought of Neal's dalliance with the FBI as another con, another part for Neal to play, another mark for Neal to dupe. This season has been the first to really explore Neal's duality in a tangible way, and while Neal ultimately opted to stay in New York (rather than making a run for it like I would have wanted), I felt like the writers really looked at both options and led Neal to a justifiable conclusion. I have a much easier time sympathizing with his decision when I've seen him truly, honestly consider the feasible alternative. This is the first time his willingness to stay on the tether has truly been a choice, not a nuisance. In my book, that makes it matter a whole lot more. He's no longer Peter's prisoner by law, he's a partner by choice.

Leading Neal down such a path of soul-searching and priority-sorting makes the climax of the episode all the more thrilling and terrifying. Having managed to recover the Degas that would have sealed Neal's and Mozzie's fates in a true nail-biter of a plan, the audience is finally given a few seconds to breath, only to have it snatched away again in the final two minutes of the episode. Honestly, from the word go, I was on pins and needles worrying about whether or not Neal and Mozzie would succeed. Peter's trust in Neal has been on cracked ice for the whole season and with the midpoint fast approaching, the stakes have gotten high right along with my blood pressure. This show has proven that it's willing to take a chance here and there an reinvent the game, so the prospect of Peter actually catching Neal in a lie is a possibility. It's for this reason that the death-defying gambit to recover the Degas got me on the edge of my seat. In my heart of hearts, I knew Neal would succeed, but at the end of the day, he's been caught twice before. The writers did a fantastic job ratcheting up the suspense, notch by notch, right until the bitter end when the painting is deemed a forgery. Even then, Peter is so shaken that it's hardly a moment to relax. He's been so certain that Neal was the guy that he can't let go, which means neither can the audience. We're allowed a moment to let the tension slack, but then they go and turn it up to 11, pulling the rug right out from under us with Elizabeth's abduction.

I always appreciate it when, especially for a procedural, foundations of storylines were set up several episodes ago. Keller is an excellent and menacing villain, so bringing him back was an inspired move. The writers specifically pointed out how nervous Keller makes Elizabeth in the last episode, but smoothly veiled it in terms of her concern for Peter, whom Keller had kidnapped. I honestly didn't see it as a set-up for her own abduction at Keller's hands, which makes it all the more satisfying and surprising. The fact that she finds him so terrifying only serves to up the ante, which, quite frankly was pretty sky-high. When Peter walks into his home, so out of him mind with worry that the walls are shaking and everyone sounds like they're underwater, you can feel just how rattled he is. The direction may have been a bit over the top, but in that moment, the viewer can feel how panic-stricken he is, and can see it too. The art direction was pitch-perfect as well, with a pot of red sauce spilling onto the floor in the kitchen, looking just enough like a grisly murder scene to upend Peter even more. That was a very nice touch. The aspect that hit me the hardest though, was when Neal walked into the room and locked eyes with Peter. I thought it was interesting and even off-putting that when Keller called Peter and said confirmed that Neal had the treasure, that Peter took his word at face value. At least I think he did. Anyway, I guess Peter was so sure he was right that it didn't matter the source. That, or he still has no idea, but has to take him at his word. Having just been told that his wife is in danger because Keller wants the treasure Neal has been hiding, I was really scared for how Peter would react to seeing Neal across the room. For a second, I thought Peter would explode, screaming, "You! This is all because of you!" at Neal, but turns out, he's so overcome that all he can say is that his wife is gone. In its own way, that hits so much harder.

This turn of events changes the whole game and in an even bigger way than if Peter had caught Neal with his hand in the impressionist jar. The difference here is that it's all on Neal now. Peter has Keller's word that Neal has the art, but in the end, it's up to Neal to cop to it. This really is Neal's fault in a number of ways and Neal knows it. Compounding the internal turmoil, Neal finally decided to stay in New York, with Peter. He watched Mozzie walk out the door to begin the life they'd always dreamed of, and opted to stay with his new family, his new priorities, and his leash. In that one moment, Neal had made his decision and was in a position to make it come true. Keller taking Elizabeth rocks that situation to the core. If Neal gives up the art to save Elizabeth, he's been caught and his relationship with Peter is ruined, if he keeps the lie intact and tries to save Elizabeth in some other way, he risks losing her altogether. This is a no win situation in just about every sense of the term and Neal knows. Peter knows it too. This development sets up the second half of the season for even more intensity and emotional nuclear war than we've already had, and that's saying something. Surely Elizabeth will be fine, and odds are they'll save her in the first episode back, but however they go about it, things will never be the same.

This show started out very fluffy, very "blue skies," and fairly ordinary in its first season. The second season it really upped its game, and with the third, it's changed a lot of the rules. My only fear is that the writers are so stuck on "capers-of-the-week" that they won't be able to explore this new dynamic in all the ways I hope they will. Whatever the fallout, it'll be hard to believe Peter and Neal working together to foil bad guys in the same way ever again. Even if they do retain the procedural quality of the show (and I'm sure they will), at the very least, every seemingly fluffy A plot will be tinged with all the weight thrust upon it by the current situation. This show took a while to become appointment TV, and it certainly has its flaws, but in its own way, it has turned into a solid drama and a top tier program all the way.

I'm hopeful that this story arc, and other steps by USA network to retool their brand, will take the show in a new, more intense, and more adult direction. I love the laughs, which surely will remain in tact, but I'm a delighted nail-biter when the occasion merits it. Here's hoping for more.

In the immortal words of Willy Wonka, "The suspense is terrible. I hope it'll last."

Grayer Skies, Better Shows

2011-08-05T11:27:00.005-06:00

Even if you who don't eat, live, and breathe TV like I do, you probably have a fair grasp of network branding. CBS tends toward law enforcement procedurals, the CW is errs on the side of teen soaps, FX is gritty and masculine, etc. I happen to watch programming on nearly every network whether I'm the key demographic or not, so it's mainly academic for me, but in general, branding is a concept I have love-hate relationship with. For example, when a new show airs on CBS, I have a fair idea what I'm in for, whether that's accurate or not. On the one hand, it's nice to know what kind of a tone and narrative structure you're probably in for, but on the other, I almost passed by The Good Wife, expecting it to be a crappy law procedural, a la the brand, rather than the hard-hitting, brilliant serial drama that it is. It's a double-edged sword that can help build a loyal fanbase for a network, but can also bite that network in the ass when they try to draw outside the lines. More than a few shows have fallen victim to off-branding. Southland was hardly a decent fit for whatever is left of NBC, but is right at home on TNT. Dollhouse and Firefly were at least brand-adjacent with Fox's emphasis on younger males, but it's hard to argue that they wouldn't have found better footing on Syfy. As these two examples illustrate, cable has the luxury of niche programming in a way that the big four generally don't. Basic cable networks especially can tap into a very specific demographic and can survive without the huge numbers that network TV demands. In this sense, cable networks oftentimes have a more defined brand, but they also have the power to step outside that branding with relative impunity.

That lengthy preamble brings me to one of basic cable's most successful networks, USA. Show for show, season for season, USA has hardly had a misstep. It's actually incredibly impressive the way the network uses its current programs to set its new shows up for success. I honestly can't even think of a the last time a new show didn't get a second season. Fairly Legal came the closest, but rather than pulling the plug, USA decided to retool and relaunch it instead. The reason they can use their current shows to boost their new shows is branding. USA has what is called "Blue Skies" programming in the biz. If you like one of their shows, odds are you'll like some of the others because in terms of tone, narrative approach, basic structure, and amount of risk-taking, all of their shows fall within a fairly narrow spectrum. There's a certain amount of deviation from the midline, but in general, USA shows are light and breezy to watch, are exciting, but not gut-wrenchingly suspenseful, and tend to wrap up the A-plot in a neat bow at the end, keeping the ongoing storylines ever-present, but clearly secondary. The term "Blue Skies" doesn't only mean that the stakes are never all that high, but also comes from the fact that these shows quite simply have a lot of blue sky. Seriously, next time you watch a USA show, take a look at the weather.

It's a brand that has a wide appeal and is easy to enjoy. I'd put Burn Notice and In Plain Sight at the gritty end of the spectrum, if you can believe it, and put shows like Psych and Royal Pains at the fluffiest end. It's a brand that I clearly enjoy, given how many USA shows are in my regular rotation (with the exceptions of Royal Pains, Fairly Legal, and Necessary Roughness, I watch them all), but it gets tedious. I know that even when things are at their worst, it will all probably work out okay in the end. Heretofore, BN and IPS have taken the most chances and imparted the most heartbreak, but at the end of the day, our heroes come out on top. It makes for fun and entertaining programming, but also makes for a predictable show and occasionally unsatisfying aftertaste.

I think USA has finally noticed that this is the case. There are only so many episodes of these shows you can watch before you can tell exactly what is going to happen and at what minute. I've felt that USA needed to switch things up and takes some real risks for a long time. Well, in the biggest surprise the network has doled out in years, they are managing to take the most risks and play with their brand in the most satisfying ways with one of the most overpopulated genres in town: the legal show. I started watching Suits with the assumption that it would be like every other USA show, but, you know, with lawyers and stuff, but I'm very pleased to report that I sold the show and the network short. What could have been, and by all accounts should have been your typical blue skies buddy show about a wacky law office has proved itself to be more engaging, mature, and off-brand than I ever would have expected. It actually does fit with the network brand in a fair few regards, but in so many little ways, Suits is taking USA in a new and far more satisfying direction.

It isn't overt and it isn't brazen, but the seeds of change are there and I'm loving them. I think the first thing that really struck me is the more liberal use of language on Suits. While other USA shows are unrealistically squeaky clean, relying on only the occasional "damn" or "hell," Suits uses a vocabulary that would be more akin to an episode of Justified. It still pales in comparison to pay cable, but for USA, the occasional "shit" makes a statement. It may seem like nothing, but in its own little way, it's telling the audience that this is a more adult show and that it isn't intended for the whole family. The biggest problem with the network, as far as my enjoyment of its programming is concerned, is that they have always cast too wide a net. When you're appealing to all ages and demographics, your hands are tied. Suits unties those hands ever so slightly, and seems to be upping the ante more and more as the show goes on. Where the pilot held to the party line in most ways, merely dipping a toe outside the blue skies mantra, the subsequent episodes have gone further and further into that delightful gray area that makes a good serial a good serial. What I initially thought would be another USA fluff piece has unexpectedly turned into a smart, sexy serial replete with characters who aren't always likable, which paradoxically, makes me like them a whole lot more.

I had heard rumor that the most recent episode, titled "Play the Man", would be the episode that, if you weren't already invested, you absolutely would be afterward. Well, I was already pretty invested in the show, but I can absolutely see what they mean. Only 7 episodes into its freshman season and I'm blown away by how good it is and how committed I am to the show. Most shows take me a few episodes to really get me hooked, but Suits not only has me hooked, it has me thoroughly impressed in a way that most USA shows simply don't. The show's willingness to diverge from the mold is what makes it great. Suits is, more than anything, a serial. In the same way that The Good Wife is a procedural wrapped in a gripping serial, Suits has its cases of the week, but at its core, it's about the characters involved. The cases of the week are never throwaways and even the most seemingly irrelevant court case finds a way to relate to the characters or illustrate a new aspect of their personalities. I really feel like these characters are on a journey that continues week to week and that doesn't get wrapped up at the end of the hour and doesn't get reset sometime between the end of the previous episode and the beginning of the next. For me, that's what great television is. If I wanted an encapsulated experience, I'd watch a movie. The beauty of TV is that you get to see what happens next. With far too many programs out there (and certainly not just on USA), what happens next is exactly what happened before, only with different guest stars.

Suits is drawing a line in the sand for USA network. If "Play the Man" is an indication of where the series is heading, I'm in. I am all in. Rather than providing a forgettable throwaway A-plot, the wacky misadventures of which to be discarded at the end of the hour, this episode, of this show, examines the cost of winning in a way that illuminates the characters in a surprisingly captivating way. Through Harvey (whose hair is looking a whole lot better and a whole lot less shellacked) and Mike, the show looks at the toll being a winner can take on those around you and on yourself. It sounds incredibly cheesy and cliche, but the show pulled it off in a truly lovely way. The hallmark of an excellent show is the ability to establish characters quickly and in a way that gets that audience invested effortlessly. Abigail Spencer guest stars as Scottie, an old college rival/friend/casual sexual partner of Harvey's. The love-hate competition between the two could have been a trite retread of the same dynamic we've seen a million times, but I found myself instantly invested in her character, her and Harvey's relationship, the case they were working on, and the fallout their rivalry would have on their mutual affection. In only one half of one episode, the storyline had me completely enthralled. The bare bones of the case they were working on were interesting enough in their own way, but it was the ways in which it affected Harvey and Scottie that really hit me. I've always been a sucker for this kind of contentious romantic vibe, but rarely do I fall into it so easily. The chemistry between the pair was so palpable that when they part ways at the end, I was already pondering ways in which she could casually become a series regular on the show, living in a lovely town called Denial where her character would call off her wedding and move to New York. That that final scene to have the necessary impact, the writers had to establish this couple as one you'd fall in love with, and amazingly, they succeeded in spades. For as wonderful as Scottie was, more than anything, I loved what it brought out in Harvey's character. He's a winner first, last, and always, so to place him in a set of circumstances in which he truly was sorry to have won was heartbreaking and endearing. He and Scottie are so much the same that they were both willing to annihilate the other in order to win the case. Harvey felt duped by her, realizing he'd been played after a steamy romp ("You think I don't recognize victory sex when I see it?"), and took all necessary countermeasures to crush her for it. On paper, two worthy opponents met and fought and Harvey won. But in terms of the cost of winning, Harvey lost, and he knows it. There were a lot of wonderful scenes in this episode, but it was the scene at the bar at the end that hit me the hardest. I went back and rewatched it immediately after the show ended. It was really, truly beautiful. It's all fun and games until someone crushes his/her opponent and leaves the loser plummeting. The best part of this scene was that they both knew exactly how horrible things were. Most shows would have written it with the loser being completely pissed or whiny, refusing to even engage the winner, but here, these two foes, who adore each other in their own way, walked away from the Pyrrhic victory licking their wounds. Heartbreak is written all over both their faces when they see each other and its immediately clear to both that the games are over. There's no coming back from this one. They both played the game well, but the stakes were too high and the downfall too harsh. Technically, Harvey walked away with a big win and Scottie simply lost the battle, but in reality, Harvey was the cutthroat lawyer he always is and Scottie got fired and lost her footing in her firm. Had the tide turned, and it's nice to have a show where that's an actual possibility (honestly, one of the best parts of the show is that they allow their characters to fail), and Harvey had been crushed, this scene would have played out in much the same way. As it stands, Scottie makes the break that deep down they both know is necessary. Their relationship is fun and sexy and exciting, but also brutal. She decides she's going to marry her boyfriend back in London and walk out of Harvey's life. It's a heartbreaker in the best possible way. What I liked best was that no one was bitter. When she starts to walk away and Harvey stops her, wrapping her in his arms, it's clear that these are two people who really needed a hug. They put each other through the wringer and neither came out unscathed. When Harvey says, "I'm sorry I won," I believe it. I believe it more than anything else he's ever said. Is it true? I think so. Harvey is a straight shooter who doesn't mince words. He says what he means. And here he's a winner who's sorry he won. "No, Harvey. I would hate it if you were sorry for that," she responds. This interaction goes against both of their natures and they know it. They are both super-competitive winners who live for the kill. Until now. Which is why Scottie leaves and Harvey lets her go. I'm amazed at how much I cared about this storyline, but that's what good writing does to me. I don't need to see the same people solving the same crimes or winning the same cases week-in and week-out, I need a true examination of the human condition, and that's what I got.

Not only did this episode explore the true cost of winning with Harvey, but it looked at the flip side of the coin with Mike. They've been posed as foils for one another since day one, but it was with this episode that I truly appreciated how wonderful these two are together, which is strange, because they spent almost no time together onscreen. This episode took these two very different men and walked them down the same path, but with one winning the case and the other winning at life. Mike's flirtation with Rachel is put to the test with a mock trial, the results of which I was even more invested in than with Harvey's real case. Mike is the screw-up, but he's ultimately very capable of being an amazing lawyer just by being himself. The show does a lovely job of putting Mike and Rachel at odds and throwing Jenny into the mix to really stir things up. At the end, when Rachel asks Mike to think about the reasons she was so made at him, it drives it home how much she cares about him. Mike may be a genius, but it seems above his head that the reason she expects so much more of him is that she genuinely like him. However dense he may be, he knows how much he likes her and he won't compromise that. Mike has the opportunity to crush his opponent, just as Harvey did, but Mike looks at the collateral damage and begs off. He's takes the loss in order to win, something that Harvey scorns and scoffs at just prior to the bar scene with Scottie. I think that's why I believe him so much when he says he's sorry he lost. He just balled out Mike for taking the loss to save someone he cares about, only to realize he wishes he'd done the same. Harvey accuses Mike of having a weak stomach and no killer instinct, but ultimately? It took a lot more fortitude to take the loss and the outcome was a lot more satisfying for Mike in the end. After all was said and done, both our male leads met with the women they love at a bar. Harvey's ends in loss because he won, Mike's ends in a win because he lost. The show did a lovely job paralleling the two men and the different outcomes. It wasn't oppressive or cheesy, but was symmetrical and powerful. Well played, show. Well played.

I'm loving this show so much more than I ever thought I would and for reasons I never would have expected. When the series began, I thought I had all the characters pretty well pegged. Harvey is the arrogant dick, Mike is the adorable wayward screw-up with a heart of gold, Louis is just plain evil, and the woman are simply eye candy supporting players. I'm rarely so happy to be wrong. The biggest surprise I'd say is the characterization of Harvey. USA has a tendency to make characters a little too likable most of the time, but at its basis, Harvey is a character I never thought I'd gravitate toward. To my delight, Gabriel Macht luxuriates in the role and makes him attractive and interesting without being "blue skies" likable. Probably more than any other character on the show, Harvey lives in the gray area. He's a cuttroat lawyer who knows how to win, but he barely even tries to mask how much he truly cares about people. Finding the balance between those dual roles is thrilling to watch. He's not the kind of character I ever would have expected to gravitate toward, but I find myself oddly attracted to him. He's almost like a modern Don Draper (made all the more palpable by the fact that Abigail Spencer used to be on Mad Men) and I can't seem to tear my eyes off of him. Let me just say, the view is pretty nice from here. He's layered and can be an ass sometimes, but that's what makes him all the more captivating.

The other major surprise and delight is the depiction of women on the show. Initially, I was unimpressed. Jessica, Rachel, and Donna seemed like little more than second fiddle supporting players whom I assumed would pop up when needed then receded to the background. In another divergence from the norm, these supporting players are actually well-rounded and engaging characters on their own. Would they exist without Harvey and Mike at the center of the show? No. But would Harvey and Mike have much without them? Certainly not. I assumed Jessica would be the boss with brass balls, Rachel would be the hard-to-get love interest, and Donna would just sort of be there. Once again, I'm thrilled to be wrong. Jessica is fabulous in so many ways and brings a snarky humor to the table that belies the stereotypical "woman in power". Rachel has a lot more going for her than Mike's affections, and Donna is the biggest surprise of all. She doesn't get as much screentime as the others, but her dynamic with Harvey is pitch perfect. He's a slick legal eagle who knows how to take charge, but she brings out a wonderfully playful side of him. Their chemistry together is hilarious and warm and he plays the straight man to her comedy flawlessly. Rather than chastising her for not working or giving him a hard time, Harvey happily plays along. One of the aspects I like best about his character is that he appreciates different kinds of people and he recognizes the gem he has in Donna. She was absolutely wonderful this week and I hope the writers take that into account when penning future episodes.

It speaks volumes about the show that I just spoke volumes about the show. I fully intended this to be a simple little post about my admiration for a new show, but turned into an epic tome about humanity. The short of it is, if you aren't watching Suits, you should be. It's close enough to the brand to appeal to true "Blue Skies" aficionados, but strays into grayer skies enough to be distinctive and addictive. While some USA staples have been hit or miss lately, I find myself looking forward to Suits more than most of my other shows. It has seen a near unprecedented and meteoric rise to my top tier, and if it keeps up its game to even a small degree, it'll stay there for the long-haul. Suits allows it characters to fail, to be unlikable at times, and to jump feet first into ethical and moral gray areas in a way that most of their shows don't. To that I say, more please.

I, for one, hope those gray skies never clear up. That's what puts on my happy face.

Fall 2011: Watch, DVR, or Skip?

2011-07-28T15:15:00.007-06:00

Now that I've finally, finally, finally posted previews of the new shows coming to network TV this fall, here's the handy-dandy, considerably shorter guide to which new shows are worth watching and which aren't. Bear in mind that these are based on my tastes and preferences, so if you're a hardcore procedural fan, take these recommendations with a grain of salt.

My determinations also had a lot to do with buzz about certain shows. I have yet to see the full pilots, but a number of people in the biz have. Depending on how much I trust their opinions, some shows were moved around a bit. Long story short, my perceptions of the trailer aren't the only factor here. This is a list of what I think is worthy of an audience and what isn't. I've been wrong before and I'll be wrong again, fair warning.

I've been told on numerous occasions that my blogposts are entirely too long, so for those of you who don't care much for readin', I'm including a measure for my level of stoked-edness. The Stokeometer, if you will, ranging from "Not Even Kind of Excited" at 0 to "Can Hardly Contain Myself!" at 10.

-----WATCH---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
These are in no particular order, but I tried to keep the midseason offerings at the bottom. I may have missed on though. Networks seem hell-bent on keeping some of the best options till the dead of winter which is weird, and inexplicable, and hard to keep track of.

Once Upon a Time
Of the shows premiering in the fall, this one probably tops my list. From the trailer alone, it looks like it could go either way, but chatter online promises that it may just be the best new show of the fall. Count me in!
* Stokeometer Level: 9
Person of Interest
If this is even half the show the creative team behind it would suggest it will be, I'm completely stoked. It looks to be a slick thriller with a hell of a cast. Assuming it shies away from being too procedural, this should be pretty amazing.
* Stokeometer Level: 7.8
Ringer
It's hard to say how excited I'd be if Buffy weren't at the helm, but thankfully, she is, so I can't help but be excited for this one. I may be setting myself up for disappointment here, but when it comes to the Whedonverse, I'm a perrennial optimist (even if not at any other time).
* Stokeometer Level: 8.5
The Secret Circle
Well, I was skeptical of The Vampire Diaries at first, and look where that ended up (i.e. Awesomeville). I'm more than a little dubious about the cast, and I'm a bit worried that Kevin Williamson will be spreading himself too thin, but I can't help but be excited for any and all projects that are even tangentially associated with Ian Somerhalder.
* Stokeometer Level: 8
Terra Nova
This is one that, based only on what I've seen (i.e. the trailer and various articles), I probably would have put in the DVR category. What can I say? When I hear that a show will appeal to everyone, ages 9 to 90, I become a bit leery. That said, critics in the biz are singing its praises. It looks to be one of the biggest premieres of the fall and I'll certainly be there to see if it lives up to the hype.
* Stokeometer Level: 7
Pan Am
On paper, I wasn't all that excited at all. But, based on the trailer and a run down of the creative team, I'm surprisingly intrigued by this one. I'll be starting Mad Men (which is finally on Instant Play) in the coming months, so Pan Am should make for a nice companion piece.
* Stokeometer Level: 7.3
New Girl
Okay, wow, of all the shows that were influenced by critical reaction online, this one has to be the top of the heap. I'm no fan of Zooey's, but everyone seems to think this show is amazing and that it could be the next big thing. I have my doubts, but I'm actually really hoping to eat my words (which isn't to say that I'm chomping at the bit either).
* Stokeometer Level: 6.2
Suburgatory
This one isn't so much a "Can't wait!" as a, "This could be something really special". I wouldn't say I'm on pins and needles, but it looks like it has a hell of a lot of potential. I have to admit, I hate the title, but if that's the worst thing I can say at this point, they m
* Stokeometer Level: 6.9
Revenge
Ooooh, I'm actually very intrigued by this on, even with Emily van Camp at the helm. It looks like the kind of concept that will fall apart after the first season, but that's okay. I'm still looking forward to it, even if not for the long-haul.
* Stokeometer Level: 7.5
Scandal (midseason)
This was a tough one. The pessimist deep within (and, let's face it, without) is sure that this will be a disaster on par with Shonda's other recent shows, but I can't help but be intrigued. It looks like a step out of the box for her (even if just a toe) and I have to remind myself that, back in the day, I actually really enjoyed Grey's Anatomy. In hopes that she captures that again, I'm excited. Plus, Desmond!!!
* Stokeometer Level: 6.7
Smash (midseason)
Oh, midseason. Why must you be so far away? This is far and away the show I'm most excited about, but it's hard to maintain that kind of enthusiasm through the next 6 or 7 months. Still, my love of musical theatre combined with my love of TV? Yes, please!
* Stokeometer Level: 9.5
Apartment 23 (midseason)
This one looks just quirky and snarky enough to be awesome. It combines actors from all sorts of shows that I've adored in the past, so I couldn't really ask for more. Here's hoping they don't blow it, because they really do have a ton of things going for them.
* Stokeometer Level: 7.4
Good Christina Bitches (midseason)
Or GCB, for short. Or lame. Title notwithstanding, this looks completely awesome and stars our good friend Olive Snook. I hate that it's held till midseason, but hopefully that will give them time to figure out a different title. GCB is not going to work, people.
* Stokeometer Level: 9
Alcatraz (midseason)
This one is the most perplexing in the "why the hell are they waiting till midseason" category. It's high concept, but it looks to be fairly procedural, stars Hurley, and is produced by JJ Abrams. I'm excited and so is everyone else. Here's hoping that excitement lasts for a very long time because this one is going to be a very long wait.
* Stokeometer Level: 8.8
Awake (midseason)
With procedurals taking over the airwaves, it's very nice to see a high concept, cerebral show coming down the pike. I'm sure they'll try to throw in a fair bit of weekly one-off storylines as well, but this one is inherently serial, whether viewers like it or not. Me? I like it. A lot.
* Stokeometer Level: 8

-----DVR---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When I put these shows into this category, it mainly points to some conflicted feelings. I think they look good enough to give them a chance, but they could also get kicked to the curb after the pilot. Appointment TV? Perhaps not. But they all seem to be worth giving a shot.

Prime Suspect
I want to be excited about this one, but it's a remake of a British show (which are almost invariably superior) and the concept just seems dated. It's also a cop show, and more than likely, 80% procedural. That said, the trailer was intriguing and Maria Bello seems to do a lovely job. With reservations, I'll be watching.
* Stokeometer Level: 5.5
The Playboy Club
I was on the fence about this one after the trailer, but it looks like it could turn into a fun, sudsy, night-time soap drama, which could make for a nice guilty pleasure. That said, if the religious right and the conservative nutjobs of the world have their way, it could get very difficult to actually see this show on the air. This might be a "watch online" venture whether it's awesome or not. Dear Religious Nutballs, In what universe is Law & Order: SVU totally inoffensive, but a show like The Playboy Club isn't? Apparently, in whatever universe that may be, it's just good family fun to see countless women get brutally raped, tortured to death, and dismembered, but seeing them dressed in 1960's bunny girl outfits is simply going to far. Wouldn't want to see people actually enjoying sex, now would we? Bastards.
* Stokeometer Level: 6
Up All Night
I'm honestly not all that excited for this one, but it has a stellar cast and the trailer had some charm to it. That said, I hate children, so this could easily be a good show that just isn't my cup of tea. At the very least, it should be a quality production with some decent bones to build upon.
* Stokeometer Level: 4.8
The River (midseason)
This looks like it could be an excellent show, but it just doesn't really strike me as the kind of show I'd really get hooked into. I think this one will get lost in the midseason shuffle and will have a hard time finding a consistent audience. In short, I don't think it's going to set the world on fire or anything.
* Stokeometer Level: 4
Grimm
Sigh. In theory, I should be uber-excited for this one. Between the creative team, the Whedonverse connections, and the base concept, this sounds like it should be well within my wheelhouse. But, and it's a big but, the trailer was pretty abominable and I have serious reservations about them pulling this off. In the fairy tale royal rumble, my money's on Once Upon a Time.
* Stokeometer Level: 5.2
Free Agents
Speaking of my Whedonverse allegiances, it's Giles! In short, if the lead couple can create some real chemistry between them, this could be a fun little time killer. If not, it's dead in the water, with or without Giles on board. In many ways, I'm more afraid of this one than not. I hate seeing actors I love in sub-par shows... here's hoping it's better than it looks.
* Stokeometer Level: 4
Hart of Dixie
I've heard online that this one is actually quite charming. I don't think I'll ever believe Rachel Bilson is a doctor, but if I'm willing to suspend my disbelief for shows like True Blood, surely I can force myself to stretch it even farther and believe that Bilson is anything but Summer Roberts. The creative team has a number of credits that I've adored in the past, so with any luck, they'll make this one work.
* Stokeometer Level: 5
Man Up
Well, it looks better than some of the comedies coming this fall, so I'll give it a chance. It might be that I watched the trailer for this one right after watching the trailer for Last Man Standing, but this looks pretty decent. I can't say I'm excited, per se, but it looks less awful than some of the others? Low bar...
* Stokeometer Level: 3.9

-----SKIP---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ugh. These are the shows that I might not even screen the pilot. Knowing me, I will, but that's only for the sake of saying I've given it a chance. I can't imagine any of these will defy my expectations and become a show worth watching.

I Hate My Teenage Daughter
This looks like one of the many comedies that I don't find comedic at all. If the base concept weren't enough to turn me off, the execution is.
* Stokeometer Level: 1.1
Finder
Unlike most of the shows on this list, I actually kinda sorta have seen the pilot for this one (the backdoor pilot in Bones), and I was not impressed. Bones is mediocre enough, but this goes one step further. I've heard they're overhauling it in a number of ways though, so maybe they'll be able to make it watchable.
* Stokeometer Level: 2.2
Last Man Standing
This looks to be the most painfully unfunny, loathsome new show of the fall. Why oh why is anyone giving Tim Allen his own show? And why are they allowing him to play the same unfunny character he played in Home Improvement? Ugh.
* Stokeometer Level: 0
Work It
Painful. Just painful. If you're one of those people who thought it was hi-larious for the football players to dress up as cheerleaders, however, sign yourself up.
* Stokeometer Level: 0.8
Unforgettable
Yet another crime procedural. Stupid bent. No, thanks. If I were more of a procedural fan in general, I could be okay with this, but I can only take procedurals in small doses.
* Stokeometer Level: 2
A Gifted Man
This is a well-made show with a fine cast, but it looks absolutely awful. Sappy, cheesy, melodramatic, and lame, I don't think I'll be signing up for this one.
* Stokeometer Level: 1.6
Charlie's Angels
This looks pretty awful. From what I've read, it's pretty sub-par, even for people who love this kind of thing. Hell, even the websites that I frequent that are always nice have some negative things to say. Odds are I'll have way more than that. I think this one will open big, then fall off sharply week-to-week.
* Stokeometer Level: 2
Whitney
I've heard that Whitney Cummings is actually pretty funny, but when watered down to network levels, any and all bite from her comedy routine gets lost.
* Stokeometer Level: 1.5

CBS Pilots 2011: Volume 2 (comedies)

2011-07-28T11:55:00.000-06:00

Finally, we're in the home stretch, people. Two more pilots to discuss. I think we can all agree that it's about damn time.

Last up, CBS comedies. In general, CBS does very very well with their comedy ventures. Hell, the shows they cancel get better ratings than the shows NBC keeps. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean their comedies are fantabulous by any stretch. How I Met Your Mother had some good times, but their best is far behind them. The Big Bang Theory is okay in very small doses, but beyond that, it gets pretty old pretty fast. All the others are just painful, with Two and a Half Men taking the top spot among the awfulest of the awful. Which of course means that it had the highest ratings in town. Ugh. Hopefully Charlie's meltdown will take the show down as well.

To the heap of mediocrity and pain, CBS add two more ventures for the fall:

2 BROKE GIRLS

Description: Stars Kat Dennings (Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist), newcomer Beth Behrs, Matthew Moy (Scrubs), Garrett Morris (Saturday Night Live) and Jonathan Kite. Co-written by Michael Patrick King (Sex and the City) and comedienne Whitney Cummings.

First Impressions: Meh. The odd couple set-up, especially the social class odd couple is pretty standard and I've seen it all before. That said, it's a set-up that can work, though I'm not so sure that's the case here. This show seems hell-bent on incorporating as many pop culture references as it can rather than creating situations that are truly funny. Topical pop culture references have their place and can elicit a cheap laugh (the only line I thought was funny here was the crack about Paris Hilton), but all it really means is that the show won't age well. I don't know, these two actresses seem charming enough and maybe after some time the show will find its own unique voice, but from what I've seen so far, I'm unimpressed. CBS comedies are usually a miss for me and this one looks to be no exception. From what I've seen of viewer comments so far, most people will be tuning in to see Kat Dennings' rack, not the show. I'm not network exec, but that doesn't sound like a good sign. At least something is drawing viewers?

HOW TO BE A GENTLEMAN

Description: Stars David Hornsby (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia), Kevin Dillon (Entourage), and Dave Foley. David Hornsby (“It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia”), Adam Chase (“Friends”), Ted Schachter (“The Invention of Lying”), Joe Hipps and Modi Wiczyk are executive producers for CBS Television Studios.

First Impressions: Was that... Murray? From Flight of the Conchords?! Well, this appears to be quite a step down. This is basically the same show as 2 Broke Girls, but with men. It's as though the same basic themes were presented to CBS and they decided to come out with his and hers versions. Um, yay? I'm feeling as lukewarm about this one as I was the other one, if not less optimistic. CBS skews slightly toward a more male audience and this show is pretty clearly geared at the guys' guys out there. I don't think I even cracked a smile while watching that trailer and Kevin Dillon is universally unappealing. It's not the worst concept I've ever heard, but the execution looks pretty poor so far. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is quite a pedigree to come from, however, so maybe the trailer simply isn't doing the show justice. I kinda doubt it though. As with so much of CBS's slate, I think I'll pass.

CBS Pilots 2011: Volume 1 (dramas)

2011-07-26T15:40:00.003-06:00

Say what you will about the majority of CBS's programming, the network does very well for itself, people. Sure 80% of their shows are crime procedurals and spin-offs of other crime procedurals, but ratings point for ratings point, it's the most consistently stable network of the big four, and outside a few notable exceptions (mostly attention-grabbing reality competition shows on other networks), has the overall highest ratings in town. Seriously, when the main problem your network faces is that it simply doesn't have room for new shows (what with all the current shows being so successful), you must be doing something right.

I scoff at a big proportion of their programming, but then I have to give them a pass for sticking with The Good Wife. It's the best network drama on television and CBS knows it. It's ratings aren't on par with the real heavy-hitters on the network, but CBS knows that The Good Wife gives it something no other big four network has: critical acclaim. While cable programming has infiltrated and nearly taken over awards shows (at least in the drama department), The Good Wife stands as the lone hold out. I like to think of CBS as a big movie studio that makes obscene amounts of money on crappy blockbusters so that it can afford to take a modest hit on the quality films.

Whatever the reasons may be, America really seems to love its gory crime procedurals, so when it comes to fall programming, CBS has a delightfully small slate for me to take care of. Hell, ABC and NBC have basically overhauled their entire networks with more new shows this fall than CBS has had in the past five years combined. Ouch.

At any rate, here's the probable schedule for this fall (new shows in all caps):

MONDAY
8/7c pm How I Met Your Mother
8:30 pm 2 BROKE GIRLS
9 pm Two and a Half Men
9:30 pm Mike & Molly
10 pm Hawaii Five-0

TUESDAY
8 pm NCIS
9 pm NCIS: LA
10 pm UNFORGETTABLE

WEDNESDAY
8 pm Survivor
9 pm Criminal Minds
10 pm CSI [new time slot]

THURSDAY
8 pm The Big Bang Theory
8:30 pm HOW TO BE A GENTLEMAN
9 pm PERSON OF INTEREST
10 pm The Mentalist

FRIDAY
8 pm A GIFTED MAN
9 pm CSI: NY
10 pm Blue Bloods

SUNDAY
7 pm 60 Minutes
8 pm The Amazing Race
9 pm The Good Wife [new time slot]
10 pm CSI: Miami

The only truly notable aspect of the new schedule for me is that The Good Wife is moving to Sundays. Many have wondered if CBS is trying to kill the show, but as far as I'm concerned, they're simply putting it on the night it always should have been on. I'm not sure how this is going to impact the ratings, but in terms of tone, I've always thought it should be on Sunday and certainly that it didn't fit with NCIS as a pairing. The Amazing Race gets amazing ratings, so from where I'm sitting, moving the show to it's new slot is a ploy to improve its ratings and keep the show alive for years to come. Here's hoping that's how it actually plays out. If any show is being set-up to slough off this mortal coil, it's CSI, which totally deserves it.

Anyway... On with the shows! Of note, there are a lot of things CBS does extremely well, but providing show trailers isn't one of them. They have a tendency to provide weird mash-ups of behind-the-scenes stuff and show clips. Bear with me...

Here are the dramas:

PERSON OF INTEREST

Description: Stars Michael Emerson (Lost), James Caviezel (The Prisoner), Taraji P. Henson (Boston Legal) and Kevin Chapman (Mystic River). From exec-producer J.J. Abrams (Lost/Fringe) and penned by Jonathan Nolan (The Dark Knight).

First Impressions: Well, shit. You can't ask for a better pedigree than JJ Abrams and anyone even remotely associated with The Dark Knight, so to say that this show should be good is an understatement. I think this is going to be one of the biggest hits of the fall. Not only does it have one hell of a creative team at the helm, but it fits with CBS's brand nicely, but improves on it. I think the only head-scratcher with this one is its scheduling. Thursday is a very big night for television, so that's right on the money, but it's lead-ins are a pair of comedies... the one just before it, a new comedy. That... doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense. But, when push comes to shove, I think this show will have enough buzz and momentum that it won't need a snazzy lead-in. I'm guessing CBS knows that. In terms of the actual show, I'm excited, but cautious. My only real apprehension is the tendency for CBS shows to be straight-up procedurals. I'm hopeful this show strikes the kind of balance that The Good Wife has with 60% serial, 40% procedural, unlike the rest of the network which errs on the side of 85% procedrual, 15% serial, if we're lucky. I've been winding my way through all six seasons of Lost over the past few months, so all I could think when watching this preview was that it looked an awful lot like Sayid would show up at any moment wondering who to kill next. Seriously, how do you trust Micheal Emerson at this point? Especially when he appears to be playing a slightly more mainland-y Ben Linus? Speaking of which, the ex-Losties certainly have done well for themselves in the coming pilot season. Just about every show has an alum (which might simply be indicative of the fact that over 6 seasons, every actor with or without a SAG card was on the show). Anyway, this is a high-budget thriller with a hell of a cast and crew and I can't help but to be excited. This show is in line with CBS, but appears to pack more punch than its usual serial-killer fare. Preventing crime isn't the most original bent in the world, but for CBS, a network whose bread and butter is found in the aftermath of horrific crime, it's pretty novel. I'm guessing it'll err on the more action-y, shoot 'em up, guy-centric end of the spectrum, but if it's done correctly, it could make for one of hell of a show. Sign me up.

UNFORGETTABLE

Description: Stars Poppy Montgomery (Without a Trace), Dylan Walsh, Michael Gaston, Kevin Rankin (Justified, FNL), and Daya Vaidya. Ed Redlich (Without a Trace) writes and executive produces alongside EP Sarah Timberman, EP Carl Beverly and writer/co-EP John Bellucci.

First Impressions: This was originally going to be called "The Rememberer", but that was kind of begging to get made fun of. I'm not saying I won't title the full review of the pilot with anything but "The Rememberererererer", but axing that title was a definite step in the right direction. That said, this looks wearily familiar and fits the CBS brand in a bad way. Where Person of Interest ups the ante, Unforgettable puts a very slight and fairly cheesy spin on the old routine. To be honest, I was so distracted by Poppy Montgomery's atrociously bad American accent that I probably missed a lot of the promo. I'm still trying to decide if maybe her character is supposed to be Australian or has a mother who is or something. Seriously, that's one of the worst I've ever heard. Which is strange, because the Aussies usually do a hell of a job. Not here. For what it is, it seems fine, I suppose. After you've seen 104 billion shows just like this, it's hard to be objective. It has all the cliches you'd expect and will cover the same ground, albeit with mostly different names. Kevin Rankin always does a nice job, but I have a sinking feeling he'll be playing second fiddle here, on a show which already looks pretty mediocre. Sad, really. At any rate, I'm not excited for this by any stretch, but it appears to be a competent production of the exact same show that people seem to love. Odds are it will do well, even if critics are bored to tears.

A GIFTED MAN

Description: Patrick Wilson (Little Children) stars as an ultra-competitive surgeon whose life is changed forever when his ex-wife (Jennifer Ehle, The King's Speech) dies and begins teaching him what life is all about. Julie Benz (No Ordinary Family) co-stars, produced by Susannah Grant (Erin Brockovich), Sarah Timberman, Carl Beverly and Jonathan Demme (Rachel Getting Married), who directed the pilot.

First Impressions: Well, first off, any show that starts off the title screen with a definition is already on my bad side (The Mentalist, I'm looking in your direction). Secondly, when it's a word that everyone already knows the definition of, you can officially bite me. Thirdly, if I have to see another show about a heartless surgeon learning to care about the little guy, I might just cry. Fourth (ly?), Julie Benz. Ugh. Fifth, I'm all for high-concept, but this just looks lame. Other than that...! Yeah, so this show isn't really grabbing me. At least not in any good ways. When it doesn't look completely cheesy or cliche, it looks painfully overwrought. The fact that CBS has this slated to anchor the night on Friday suggests that I'm not the only one who's underwhelmed by this one. It strikes me more as a bad Lifetime movie rather than a compelling series. My heart broke just a little bit to see Margo Martindale (aka, the indomitable Mags Bennett) attached to such a show. Oh, Justified. Did you have to kill her off? Yes, you did. But look at the fallout! In short, this looks like a disaster masquerading as a heart-wrenching, compelling drama. CBS struggles hardcore to incorporate shows that don't fit their model, and have had particularly poor results with medical dramas. Three Rivers, anyone? They managed to break into the lawyer genre with The Good Wife, but cops and lawyers are fairly well-connected in the end. Doctors? They really should stop trying. In case I'm being too subtle here, I'm not holding my breath on this one. It could be an amazing shows disguised as a cheesefest, but I'm doubting it.

My Latest TV Query: True Blood

2011-07-18T09:54:00.004-06:00

I realize it's probably old hat to anyone who reads this blog (surely there are a couple of you out there), but I'm a huge fan of Matt Roush's column and get a giddy thrill when he posts my questions.

Well, my most recent inquiry was insanely lengthy and I was sure he wouldn't publish it. In the back of my mind, I thought there might be a chance that he'd post a truncated version, but I wasn't holding my breath. Much to my utter delight and surprise, not only did he post my endless epistle, but he posted it in its entirety. Awh, shucks. :) I love that man. Not too long ago I wrote to him about Modern Family vs. Community, and while my question came off more pointed that I had intended, he took it in stride. I wrote him a bit of a clarification/apology some days later and he responded via email almost immediately. He's a class act all the way.

Anyway, here's my latest inquiry and his response. I honestly didn't mean for it to be so lengthy (seriously, most of the questions are about 4 lines long), but it just kind of happened. Regardless, he included. Because we're tight. ;)

Question: I just re-read your column on the return of True Blood a few weeks ago and I think you zeroed in on exactly what is most appealing about the show, most notably, the dynamic between Sookie and Eric and the introduction of witches into Bon Temps' supernatural milieu (which seems to be bubbling over like the cauldron I have to believe will be in an upcoming episode). The season is only three episodes in and I must say I'm already more enthralled by witches than I ever was with werewolves. From what I've heard from devotees of the book series, the amnesiac Eric storyline is one of the very best and from what I've seen so far, I can see why. Alexander Skarsgard's performance is hilarious and heartbreaking at the same time, delivered in a surprisingly subtle and effective way. As with previous seasons, the interactions between the human world and the vampires is the true heart of the show for me and is far and away the most captivating aspect. Even Bill, who has long played the lovesick puppy, finally has a storyline that has drawn me in and injected him into the action in a more interesting way.  

Bearing that in mind, over the course of last season, I began to realize that not only do I find the vampire/human interaction the most enthralling part of this delectable guilty pleasure, but more and more, this interest is to the exclusion of other storylines on the show. Whereas the first two seasons had a central storyline to tie all the characters together in a cohesive way (a season-long "big bad"), seasons three and four (so far) seem disjointed and sprawling. With so many characters engaged in so many disparate arcs, I find myself losing interest in the periphery. Characters that I once loved and who seemed pivotal to the show now seem inconsequential, and at times, boring. I keep assuming they'll be re-integrated into the meat of the show at some point, but it never seems to come. As I watched the last couple of episodes, I found myself desperate to watch the brewing battle between the witches and vampires, but was instead pulled away by Andy's addiction to V, Jason's were-panther problems, Sam's new shifter social circle, Tara in general, Tommy's induction into the Fortenberry clan, Arlene's demon baby, the reintroduction of werewolves and Jessica and Hoyt's relationship woes. While some of these storylines are working better than others, at the end of the day they all seem so distant from the rest of the action that I'm having a hard time really investing.  

I think the show could learn a few things from The Vampire Diaries. Rather than allowing the cast to swell and the storylines to spiral out of control in every direction, I think True Blood would be well-served by a willingness to kill off characters. It seems ridiculous to accuse True Blood of being gun-shy about killing people, but in terms of the principal cast, there have been surprisingly few deaths and an alarming number of additions. Paring down the cast would make for a more cohesive narrative and it would raise the stakes, so to speak. For all the insanity that happens on this show, I'm never all that worried that someone I love might get killed. One of the most compelling aspects of The Vampire Diaries is that viewers genuinely don't know who might die at a moment's notice. It keeps the cast at a manageable level and keeps the audience on their toes. Do you find yourself losing interest in various aspects/storylines of the show? Does it still have the same bite it once did? Is the best yet to come and I'm just being impatient? — Lacy
Matt Roush: I'm enjoying this season much more than last year, and a lot of that has to do with how marvelously Alexander Skarsgard is playing the vulnerable amnesiac Eric. Sunday night's drunk scene was a new high of feisty hilarity, and his hissing match with Alcide in the water was a riot, but then after his sunburn, watching him submit to Sookie's ministrations was awfully touching. Loving it. The witch storyline is fairly strong as well, and the great Fiona Shaw is killing it as Marnie. I agree that the Sam/Tommy subplot dragged down much of last season and feels tacked on again this year — but that's the only part that feels off to me right now. Andy's V addiction, Jason's gory misadventures with the were-panthers in Hotshot, Alcide and Debbie Pelt, Arlene's demon baby (those scenes crack me up, and they're not overdone yet) and anything involving Hoyt and Jessica all feel germane to me as this sprawling cast of characters continues to deal with the supernatural in their midst. As long as the focus stays primarily on Sookie, which the Eric storyline should ensure, I'm at peace with it. You make a good point about Vampire Diaries' ruthlessness when it comes to sacrificing characters and I marvel at the way that show burns through story, but I have to say that True Blood does a better job for me at conveying a milieu, which is to say I believe in Bon Temps and feel transported there in a way I don't where the phonier Mystic Falls is concerned.