Tuesday, September 27, 2011

TV Review: Terra Nova

I became apprehensive about Fox's new big budget dino-rama Terra Nova when I heard that they were aiming to appeal to everyone, young and old, male and female, etc. In my experience, when a show tries to please everyone, it doesn't please me. I'm sure that most viewers were more than happy with this sci-fi fantasy spectacle, but for a show about time travel and dinosaurs, I was surprisingly bored. For the entire two hours. Which felt like about... oh, let's say... 85 million years.

The short short version of this review? I spent the whole time wishing the main characters would get eaten by dinosaurs.

Okay, it wasn't a total disaster or anything, but if I'm being totally honest, I kept whinily asking the show to be over as I checked the time code on my DVR to see how much show was left. I didn't go into this one expecting to absolutely love every minute or anything, but I expected at least not to be bored. Literally, at one point two of the main characters are speeding away from a dinosaur that's trying to kill them and all I could think was, "I wonder if there are any brownies left in the kitchen... I should go check." I'm guessing I'm in the minority here when it comes to this pilot (and based on most reviews I've stumbled across, I'm mostly right), but I was underwhelmed pretty much from minute one.

Terra Nova stars Jason O'Mara as Jim Shannon, a cop living in 2149 which is a post-industrial, polluted hell hole where the air is unbreathable without a "re-breather" to assist, people are packed into crumbling cities, resources have been almost completely depleted, and population control is necessarily enforced with military precision. I knew the show was in trouble the second O'Mara got home to his family (a wife and three kids (which is one too many from a legal standpoint)) with an orange en tow. I think it must be required for all futuristic wasteland scenarios that fresh fruit be dragged out as some sort of emblem of how bad things have gotten. "Oooh, an orange?! I haven't seen one of these in years! Where did you get it?!" Ugh. Never seen that scene before. Don't get me wrong, some truly spectacular sci-fi shows have employed this hackneyed ploy, but when Firefly does it, you get a compelling piece of backstory about soldiers blowing each other up by placing charges inside apples. It was also very story specific, rather than simply being a heavy-handed illustration of the environmental state of the planet. With Terra Nova, it merely marked the first in a long long of sci-fi cliches that were borrowed from more successful predecessors.

Upon finding the Shannon family's third child hiding in a vent (stupid kid couldn't keep her mouth shut for 2 little minutes), papa Shannon gets thrown in jail for assaulting one of the officers. Two years later, his wife gets called up to go back in time 85 million years on the Terra Nova project (she's very conveniently a doctor), whereby waves of citizens from 2149 will start a new timeline of human events. Basically, humanity will be allotted 85 million extra years to destroy the joint. Yay? Good for us? After a series of highly illegal events, the whole Shannon clan, Jim and illegal extra daughter included, make their way back to Terra Nova. From there, the highly predictable chain of sci-fi cliches and "back in time" tropes fall into place one by one. I kept hoping this show would bring something truly new and unique to the genre, but more than anything, it just tried to jam-pack as many other genres on top of this one that it could, borrowing even more cliches from around the narrative world. In its attempt to craft a show for everyone, it appropriated a fairly cheesy family drama (a sub-par version of Everwood sprang to mind), excerpts from The O.C. and Melrose Place as the hot young singles in the colony (including an obvious love interest for mopey teenage son of the Shannons) go jump off a waterfall (yeah, I called that one from a mile away), healthy dollops of Lost (the "Others" are called "Sixers" these days), the sci-fi militarism we've come to know and expect from this kind of project, a ridiculous number of set-ups for young love, more than a little Avatar thrown in, and Jurassic Park style everything else. It was all very impressive to look at, but it all felt extremely familiar. Honestly, that hardly covers the pantheon of predictable plotlines, but I got bored just recounting those ones. It all made for a disappointingly clunky debut to a show that should have blown me away, not annoyed me.

For a show that's focused, has a clear identity and purpose, and whose writing team has solidified what it wants out of the show in advance, familiar tropes and storylines can easily and successfully be littered throughout. Firefly, for example, was a sci-fi western, complete with all the trappings, but was also a post-war battle between the allies and rebels, any number of love stories, a mystery, a family drama, and just about everything else. Firefly presented all these aspects in a seemingly effortless way that simply felt organic to the characters and the setting. With Terra Nova, I kept getting the feeling that there were just too many cooks in the kitchen with each wanting a certain aspect thrown in wherever it happened to fit in a shameless bid to appeal to as wide an audience as possible. Knowing the American viewing public as I do, I'm sure a lot of people were more than happy with this show because indeed, it casts a wide net. Had I not seen so many other shows from similar genres, I probably would have been far more forgiving, but for me, this massively big budget, show-stopping production felt derivative, not innovative or original.

The pilot buzzed through a hell of a lot of backstory and exposition in its two-hour debut, establishing a huge cast, a fair bit of mythology, the often saccharine and disingenuous inter-dynamics of the characters, and the scientific underpinnings of what they're doing and how. It's that last one that was probably the most unnatural for them to convey. In order for the viewers to be informed about the "science" behind it all right off the bat, eldest son Josh has to carry the idiot ball for the better part of the episode, having things explained to him by his brainy younger sister left and right. Not only would anyone in this situation know the basics of what they're doing and how, but it would have been a lot more interesting for me as a viewer to leave some of it unclear. I don't need everything explained to me right out of the gate. I'm sure I'm in the minority once again, but I'd much rather be simply immersed in a world and have details about the mechanics relayed over time, letting them become clear naturally as I slowly learn more about the world around me. Instead of letting me wonder about the Butterfly Effect of it all, muse about the effects it will all have on the future, try to figure out how they got there, etc, I was instead forced to listen to an annoyingly stereotypical character offer a lesson to her siblings in the least natural way possible. But then again, in any family dynamic, we need to the brooding, moody rebel older son and the brainy, awkward younger sister, dontcha know. Ugh. All the plot exposition became oppressive, annoying, and largely unnecessary as the show went on. We've all seen this kind of show before, people. We don't need this. Indeed, the Butterfly Effect should have been the most interesting part of the show, with the past altering the future in unexpected ways, but this rules that out immediately, indicating that Terra Nova exists in a "different time stream" or something and therefore has no effect on the future. While I can understand where the writers wouldn't want to deal with all that (*cough* Lost *cough*), I think it would have made for a much more interesting storyline. The show could have created a dynamic whereby the colonists had no way of knowing what impact they were having on the future, which would have led to any number of moral and ethical considerations that would have been interesting to watch. As is, it kind of felt like the easy way out. A cop-out.

I think if the basic set up had been more captivating the narrative elements would have been stronger over all. To be honest, I was more interested in the hellish future than in the dinosaur-laden past. I expected the time-travelers to be establishing a new colony in the past, figuring out how to survive and determining if this gambit will actually save mankind or not. That was not the case. Rather, the Shannon family travels back in time to a colony begun several years earlier and which has huge, detached houses for each family, a well-defined compound, and residents who basically grew up there. I should have been pleasantly surprised by this one and only surprise on the show, but instead, it just seemed to limit the writers on what they could do. By the end of the pilot, it was clearly evident why the colony had to be well-established for the story they were telling (and to avoid even more Lost comparisons), but all in all, I think I would have rather watched the show I expected because the show I got was kinda dull.

The show honestly has pretty decent bones to work with, it just didn't work with them very well. I think it's the kind of show that could be really good, but that the pilot wasn't very good. This clunky hodge-podge of stories and characters didn't take full advantage of the assets at its disposal. Hopefully they will in the future... Easily the most interesting aspect of the show was the "Others" who are comprised of a group of colonist who all came back with the sixth wave (which is why they're called "Sixers" now). They broke off and formed their own colony which is now at odds with Terra Nova. They've been posited as the bad guys (or at least the opposition) of the show, but I found myself wishing I were on their journey instead of the one I was on. In spite of the constant Hallmark Family Movie moments between the Shannons, I so didn't care about that family at all. I salute the writers for trying to endear them to viewers in a substantive way, but they were all so stereotypical that it was impossible for me to jump on board or get attached. They all just seemed like 2-dimensional cardboard cutouts that I just wanted to see get eaten by dinosaurs. The Sixers were far more interesting and for the sake of my enjoyment of the show, I hope to hell they have a more prominent role in episodes to come. I think they struck me as the most interesting because their origins and motives were left unsaid, allowing me to speculate and theorize to my heart's content. Had I been forced to listen to clunky plot exposition in that regard, I'd probably be as disillusioned with them as with the main guys, hoping both bloody colonies get eaten by dinosaurs. Fortunately though, they left some room to grow in this regard and I'm genuinely intrigued. Added to that, Captain Taylor (the main guy leading Terra Nova) has a son that went missing years back who, I like to think, has something to do with the Sixers, but we don't know what. What we do know is that he's most likely the one behind a number of mathematical inscriptions on some stones by the falls that look like they were left a confoundingly long time ago. My hope is that Taylor's son is some sort of a genius who devised a way to manipulate time by himself and went even further back and left the inscriptions. Between Taylor's son and the Sixers, I was rather entertained amid the other blander aspects of the pilot. Hell, they were a lot more captivating than the Shannon family and even the dinosaurs.

Speaking of the dinosaurs, I did not love the CGI. At times, the dinosaurs looked really good, but more often than not, it was pretty apparent that managing the level of special effects necessary to be convincing on a television budget was a pipe dream. This was an obscenely expensive television pilot and I still wasn't buying the dinosaurs half the time. Man alive, I can only imagine what they'll look like week-to-week with only one fifth the budget to rely on. Prepare yourselves for puppets on sticks in the future. Er, the past... You know what I mean.

I really wanted to love this pilot, and I'm sure a number of people did, but at the end of the day, I was just plain bored a lot of the time. The whole thing felt inelegantly devised and like it had been cut and pasted together from 9 other shows and 15 previous drafts. It just didn't seem to have its own identity. In theory, this is something that can easily develop over time, but really, I don't know if I want to give it that much time. I walked away from this pilot without much of an attachment to anyone. Indeed, the two characters that I found the most interesting were the two main Sixers who, all told, saw maybe 10 minutes of screentime, if that. I'm not the least bit invested in the Shannon family or their petty squabbles. In yet another trope that drives me crazy, I had to endure a family bickering over stupid, meaningless crap while there are dinosaurs trying to kill people. Yeah, so Papa Shannon went to jail for two years for punching that cop who was after his daughter, right? At one point, after the family has traveled back in time 85 millions years, whiny teenager Josh actually gets pissed at his dad for leaving them for two years and making them fend for themselves. Uh, you mean when he was in prison? Geez, the nerve of that guy! Don't worry though, the prison is squalid nightmare where they can't even use re-breathers, but Jim got a clean shave every morning, that's for damn sure. Seriously, he's supposed to look all haggard and worn, but there isn't even a trace of stubble on his cheek. Heh. What's worse, it's later revealed by the son that they probably would have incurred some sort of fine for having a third child. Seriously?! Jim freaked out and started punching people because he was afraid of a fine?! I thought the soldiers were going to kill the girl! It's things like this that make me think this script went through about a dozen drafts. At one point, maybe the soldiers would have killed the girl, but in a later draft, that seemed to harsh, so they watered it down. Quite frankly, I think it would have made for a much more compelling if the soldiers had killed the daughter. Not only would it have established the future in a way that was much more terrifying, but it would have given the family as a whole a deep-seeded resentment against the government that could have been spun into thrilling storylines once they got to the colony. Are they really loyal? Might they join the Sixers? It would have given the show a lot more gravity than it has. Hell, at the end of the day, after dinosaur attacks and military engagements, no one was killed? Seriously? Well, maybe this place isn't so scary after all... And I don't think that's a good thing.

It was all the little things that let Terra Nova down. There was no one failing that made me dislike it, no big giant Jim Caviezel to bore me to tears. Little things like the prisoner's lack of stubble, the see-through medical charts (because apparently patient privacy is a thing of the past... er, future), clothes that apparently came from The Gap and Ann Taylor (I swear to god, I think I own that sweater the mom had on), references and verbal turns of phrase that felt idiosyncratic and out of place for the future, piles upon piles of cliches, etc. all came together to the clear detriment of the storytelling. Were the narrative more compelling and original, the little things wouldn't have mattered. But, when the characters are bland and unmemorable, the conceit is overwrought and derivative, and overall narrative drive is inconsistent, the little things are much more glaring. When my family and I weren't actively mocking the show, we were pretty bored. For comparison's sake, we watched the CW's sappy, schlocky new series Hart of Dixie right after this and even for as bad as it was, we weren't as bored. At one point we were noting how cheesy and it was and I said, "Well, it's bad, but I'm not as bored as I was with Terra Nova." A sentiment echoed by the room. How sad is that? Yikes.

In fairness, it wasn't a total disaster and really does have some good elements to work with. I think if the writers can settle in and really get a good grip on their goals for the show, it could turn into something really good. While I'm not chomping at the bit for more, I think is has enough in place that I'm willing to hang on. I'm genuinely intrigued by the Sixers' story, even if not much else. My hope is that Terra Nova can break away from all the cliches and craft its own identity. If it can manage that, I think it could easily turn into something more captivating than it is. If, however, they insist on following the melodramatic, charmless Shannon family for the entirety of the show, I'll be tuning out sooner than later. Seriously, for a show with this kind of concept, I would have expected someone, anyone to have had some edge and uniqueness. Quite the contrary, I felt like I was watching the wacky hijinx of one Time Traveler Barbie after another. Here's hoping for better down the line.

Pilot Grade: C-

Monday, September 26, 2011

TV Review: Pan Am

So far, in the battle of similar shows for the fall season, we have our first real winner and loser. In the competition for "60's era throwback hoping to cash in on some of Mad Men's appeal", Pan Am is the clear victor, The Playboy Club the obvious casualty.

On the surface, and based on the promotional campaign, Pan Am seemed like a lighter-than-air send up of 60's fashion and an age when flying was glamorous and not the never-ending quest to smuggle 3.2 ounces of shampoo in your carry-on. And back when the thought of a pilot didn't bring you to the nauseating mental image of Jake from The Bachelor? Ah, the halcyon days of yore... To a certain extent, Pan Am definitely fulfills that promise, creating an atmosphere of the 60's that I gladly got swept up in. It all had a shiny, polished Catch Me If You Can vibe that was surprisingly well done and convincing. Beneath the shiny surface, however, the pilot establishes its four heroines as interesting women leading complicated lives, ranging from affairs to broken engagements to international espionage. Yeah, that last one came as the real surprise. When the pilot first began to establish the storyline, I was a bit skeptical, but as the pilot progressed, I was definitely on board. The show's international capabilities and historical flavor made the espionage angle exciting and believable, giving the show a sense of mystery and and intrigue that I genuinely didn't see coming. Espionage is always such a lovely surprise, isn't it?

Beyond the twisty or romantic plot points, it's the characters who are the core of the show. The show did an outstanding job of establishing quite a few different characters in a very short amount of time, relying on well-integrated flashbacks to flesh out each of their back stories. In spite of the number of people involved, it didn't feel rushed or forced. Indeed, the direction was very good and the pilot flowed naturally, keeping an entertaining pace throughout, all the while covering a lot of exposition. Not an easy task. Indeed, by the end of the pilot, I was kind of bummed that it was over. I got so swept up in the people, the the fabulous 60's locations around the world (I thought the special effects were quite good), and the storyline that I never once checked to see where I was in the episode and was a little surprised that 43 minutes had flown by so quickly. (I'm suddenly realizing how many unintentional puns are littered throughout this sucker. Just go with it.) Amid the personal and professional plot exposition, an ongoing storyline involving Kate's first spy mission kept me on my toes throughout, worrying that she'd be exposed, that the mission would fail, etc. It gave the pilot a nice air of suspense. I found myself really getting invested in each of these people and was genuinely dismayed at the end when it was revealed that Kate was actually replacing the elusive Bridget as the new intelligence agent. Where's Bridget? Is she dead? Why is she being replaced? What exactly did she do for them? The fact that I wondered these things at all and was so invested in the answer speaks highly of the show and bodes well for its future.

All in all, there's very little to complain about with this stylish, romantic, exciting new series. The onscreen talent is strong across the board, with each of the lead actresses bringing something unique and interesting to her role. In spite of the number of very pretty people to keep track of, I never mixed anyone up or got confused, and I walked away feeling like I have a real understanding of these women, their lives, and how liberating the job of stewardess was in some ways and how restrictive in others. The Playboy Club claims that their bunnies were the women with all the power back in the 60's, but I think it's the ladies flying 35,000 feet over the bunnies heads. In spite of the strictly-enforced uniform, complete with girdle, the restrictions and requirements, the ogling eyes of the passengers, these women got to see the world and live independently. It was an escape for monotony, from marriage, from parents, from whatever. At the end of the episode, the pilots are discussing the fact that they're different from other women, and that they're evolved. "There's more to life than primordial ooze," one pontificates. There certainly is for these women. While The Playboy Club hardly sold me on the power and independence of its bunnies, Pan Am made their case and won. I'm sure the job wasn't as glamorous as the show makes it seem, but it sparkled onscreen. In terms of perceptions of women in general, the role of stewardess doesn't seem like much a "votes for women!" step in the right direction, but taken in context of the era, it gave women a lot more freedom than many of their more traditional counterparts, and for that, I heartily approve.

All you can really ask of a pilot is that the audience wants to know more. Not only do I want to know more, but I already feel like I have an awful lot. When discussing the show at work, I was able to recount all the main characters' names without even trying. Beyond names, I feel like I have a fair grasp of who they are why they're doing what they're doing. That's a tall order for 5 episodes to fill, let alone one. Kelli Garner does a particularly nice job as novice spy Kate, but she's in good company with fine performances all around. The show created a cohesive universe and milieu for these characters to exist and it allowed the actors to really craft their roles. There were a few minor elements that I quibbled with, but when stacked up against all the show has going for it, they're hardly worth mentioning at all.

Pilot Grade: B+

TV Review: Prime Suspect

It's getting to the point where reviewing NBC pilots is just depressing. Not because they're all terrible, mind you, but because even the few that don't suck have such a slim chance of surviving. The Jeff Zucker years were not kind and NBC seems to have been "rebuilding" for ages now, to no avail. It is with that preamble that I review one of the better pilots of the fall, hopefully completing said review before the show gets canceled.

Prime Suspect stars Maria Bello (who will always be Anna Dellamiko in my heart) as a NYC homicide detective who is a good cop operating in a man's world, being undercut and harassed at every turn by her male counterparts. While I don't doubt that there's more than a little "boys' club" ridiculousness and discrimination that goes on in this kind of a workplace, it all felt a little dated and unrealistic. I'm sure there are a lot of sexist bastards out there who think these things, but it's quite another to publicly and openly harass someone like that. This show is actually a US adaptation of a British show (which starred Helen Mirren in the lead role, if you want a quick primer in American vs. British television priorities), so maybe that explains that oppressively sexist overtones. For as much as I love British programming and for as advanced and forward-thinking as the Brits generally are, there's an undercurrent of sexism in British shows that always strikes me as incredibly odd and unabashed. Perhaps that sentiment traveled across the pond along with the show.

For as irksome as the overt sexism was to watch, the show pulled it off well and crafted a work environment for Bello which, while I hope to hell is an exaggeration of reality, gave her ample chances to shine as an actress. For as eye-rolling as replacing Mirren with a younger, blonder actress was on the surface, Bello completely holds her own as the rough and tumble heroine Jane Timoney, who's attractive, but not unrealistic. It's a difficult role to manage and she pulled it off with charm and grace. Indeed, this kind of set-up, with this kind of lead role would oftentimes generate a heroine that wasn't particularly endearing or believable, but Bello's layered performance gives Timoney the range necessary to grab viewers. She's tough and composed, but she's not heartless or vindictive (even though she probably should be). For as often as the men in her department treated her like shit and told her she was invading their clubhouse, she held it together and kept a composed public face. Which isn't to say that in the privacy of her own home she was stiff as a board, but everyone, male or female, has a public and private face that they maintain.

Had Bello's performance not been as strong, I think her nauseatingly sexist colleagues would have driven me away within minutes. The show actually did a lovely, and surprisingly subtle job of making them look like the complete assholes that they are. The writers didn't shove it down the viewers' throats with grandiose speeches about equality or a cheesy voiceover explaining how things are different for men and women. Instead, they let Bello's face do the talking as she endures constant abuse with reserve and dignity. That isn't to say she sits idly as her career passes her by. She was refreshingly pragmatic and direct about her position, her colleagues, and her career path, not letting even the nastiest of invective tarnish her resolve. It was pretty apparent going in that this would be a tale of "look, she's a girl AND she's a hell of a cop!" but it played out surprisingly well. Even when Bello was clearly playing into that trope, showing up all the boys with her detective skills, it didn't come across as preachy or self-righteous. Indeed, the writers did a very nice job showing how Timoney's skill set would be beneficial to a case, female or not. The one aspect of her investigation that did hinge on the fact that she's female, specifically, is that she was able to exclude one of the suspects based on her history in vice. I particularly liked this because it seems that all female cops have had to work vice, which is annoying as hell, so at least in this instance, it worked to her advantage.

As per usual with this kind of sexist set-up, after Timoney takes over and solves the case, she gets more grief rather than less. It's bad enough in these guys' minds that she invaded their turf, but it's far worse to actually be competent. The truly unfortunate thing with women in these kind of roles or racial minorities, members of the gay community, etc, is that it doesn't matter how many times they do something right, it's the one time they do something wrong that they will carry with them. The men around her are just waiting for something to happen that they can latch onto that proves that women can't do this job. The other men might make this same mistake a million times, but it's irrelevant. It's the one time the woman screws up that not only invalidates everything she does, but all women in general. White men are allowed to be individuals. Women represent the entire gender as a whole. Sorry to be soapboxing here, but I've been in Timoney's shoes before, to a lesser extent, so I feel for her. I think most women have been in similar situations and know what its like to carry an entire gender's reputation on her shoulders. It isn't easy. Or fun. And it's a lot of pressure to endure. As such, this pilot hit home on more than a few levels, which made for an uncomfortable viewing experience at times.

Bearing that in mind, the fact that it made me uncomfortable and even pissed me off doesn't mean it was a poor pilot. Indeed, even in the subtler ways that it exposed the male/female dichotomy of her work environment, the show made its case and let the audience decide. For me, one of the most effective scenes was when the most sexist and prejudicial guy of them all gets a phonecall from his 4-year-old daughter. It's very clear that he, along with all his sexist male colleagues, absolutely adore this little girl, singing Happy Birthday to her and wishes the best of possible birthday wishes. I'm guessing a lot of people in the audience saw this as a redemptive scene whereby the audience gets to see that these guys aren't so bad after all. Who knows. Maybe that was the intent. From where I'm sitting though, it was a further indictment of these men's actions. How you can you adore a daughter and be excited for all the wonderful things to come in her life and yet treat women like this? It's always strikes me as so completely confounding that men can be so excited about their daughters, wanting only the best for them, but see women as weak wastes of space who are only allowed to do certain male-approved activities. "That's right, princess. You can be anything you want to be. As long as it's a homemaker. Or a nurse. Or maybe a kindergarten teacher." How can these men not see their own hypocrisy? I just don't get it.

I'm really going to try to move past the gender coding issue, but for a pilot like this, it's kind of a big deal. The only other aspect that I have to address is the end of the episode where Timoney chases a serial rapist and murderer into an alley and gets beaten up and tossed around like a rag doll by the guy. It was already established that this perpetrator was a little guy (slender build, maybe 5'9"), but he nearly kills Timoney without so much as a single hit from her. Now, I have no doubt that given the circumstances, any police officer, male or female, would likely need back-up for this situation. But for a tough cop, who has had extensive training, to not so much as land a punch seemed kind of ridiculous to me. At the end of the day, or in this case, at the end of the episode, she still needs a big strong man to come and save her. I was thoroughly disappointed. I came up with some narrative reasons for why the writers would have done this, but none of them were particularly satisfying. I like to think that they wanted us to understand that women are the victims of violent crimes the majority of the time and that it makes sense for a woman, who's been in those shoes, to investigate such crimes. It makes sense to me. Hell, if I had just been raped by some aggressive alpha male, the last people in the world I'd want to talk to about it would be an entire room of aggressive alpha males. No thanks. Send in a female detective. And if you don't have one in your department, promote someone.

The case of the week was well-crafted, if completely secondary to Timoney's personal journey. While I enjoyed Bello's performance quite a lot, this is a cop show first and foremost, which makes it hard for me to really jump for joy. I've heard that they'll be toning down the sexist overtones considerably, so while that will make for a more pleasant viewing experience, I'm not sure it will make for a more interesting one. The actual police work on these shows very rarely interests me, so it's the actors personal journeys that I focus on. Good cop shows can overlap the two in ways that make me care about both (like The Chicago Code) and so far, Prime Suspect has done a nice job interlacing Timoney's personal and professional lives. I'll certainly be giving this one another chance, but based on the ratings for the pilot, I'm going to try not to get too attached. It really is a quality show with a great cast, but on NBC, even quality programming doesn't stand much of a chance.

Pilot Grade: B-

Friday, September 23, 2011

TV Review: Person of Interest

And the award for most unbelievably impressive and deceptive promotional department goes to...!

Person of Interest!

Congratulations! Sort of! For outstanding achievement in the art of making a straight-up procedural with an incredibly bland, boring lead look like a serial drama and thriller, we doff our hats to you. Whatever they're paying you, it isn't enough.

Maybe my disappointment stems from the fact that I went in with too high of expectations, maybe the impressive creative team blinded me to potential foibles, maybe CBS simply has to rigid a brand for anything but The Good Wife to break through... Nope, it's Jim Caviezel. He's the problem.

Person of Interest stars Caviezel as an ex-military something or other who went off grid (presumed dead) and abandoned his old life after his wife/girlfriend/fiance/who knows died. After several years living as a vagrant basically, he resurfaces and is offered a job by a Mr. Finch (Benjamin Linus) to help prevent crimes. Using an anti-terror "machine" he created which intercepts cell phone calls, accesses surveillance cameras, hacks email etc., Finch is sent a list of social security numbers which correspond to people who are going to be involved in crimes. With only the social security numbers, neither he nor Caviezel know how this person will be involved (whether victim, perpetrator, or otherwise), but they know that the machine generated their number for a reason. Finch hires Caviezel to stop these crimes before they happen in a pseudo Minority Report kind of way. They monitor the "person of interest" through a variety of methods and then come in guns-a-blazin' to stop the evil-doings from going down. Based on that premise, the creative team (which includes JJ Abrams and Jonathan Nolan (who was one of the screenwriters for The Dark Knight), and on the promotional materials, I had very high hopes for this pilot. You couldn't ask for a stronger team behind the scenes, but as it turns out, you can most certainly ask for a stronger team onscreen.

Michael Emerson is a power-player who does a lovely job as Mr. Finch. Sure I'll never be able to see him as anything other than Benjamin Linus ever again, but that doesn't mean he doesn't pull it off. He comes across with a fairly disturbing intelligence and breadth of knowledge about nearly everything and seduces Caviezel into a job that could easily get them both killed. Emerson was not the problem. I could happily watch Emerson do just about anything week to week and be happy... Caviezel on the other hand...

I knew I didn't like Jim Caviezel going into this pilot, but I honestly couldn't remember why. As such, I was hoping that my bias was imaginary and that he'd do a lovely job. Yeah, it only took about 5 minutes for me to remember why I didn't like him. He is truly and unceasingly horrible as an actor. Simply awful. I swear to god, it was like watching a block of wood run around town surveiling and shooting people. Only a block of wood would have been more interesting to watch because it has no opposable thumbs and no brain, so shooting people would be most impressive. Caviezel's performance was completely flat from beginning to end. I realize he's playing a military veteran who's been through tragedy and all and who is probably fairly reserved these days, but Caviezel brings absolutely nothing to the role. It's not that his character had a cool resolved with something smoldering underneath the surface. There was nothing there at all. He could have played it with subtlety and restraint, that would have been fine, but there has to be something, anything deeper to rely on. I got nothing from Caviezel at any point. What's worse, even when it was obvious that he was trying to imbue a line with anger or apprehension or disgust, he failed so miserably that it was almost comedic. It felt like when you're doing an impression of a bad actor, only this was real. He couldn't convey even the most basic of emotions, letting each line land with a ker-plunk, losing all sense of intensity or intrigue. Beyond that, he's a mumbler of the highest order, so even if the words themselves could have had potential, in subtitled form, it was kind of a fail all the way around. It was truly painful to watch and managed to lessen the enjoyment I was getting from Emerson's turn as the mysterious benefactor. Based on Caviezel's total lack of performance, it's hard to even judge the rest of the pilot. He was such a complete turnoff that it was impossible for me to connect with the show in any substantive way or get invested in the storyline.

The basic concept, in and of itself, had some promise. Though slightly hokey, I had hope that the show would pull it off and deliver a true thriller, delving into the physical and psychological aspects of crime and crime prevention. Hell, the basis for Minority Report is pretty absurd on the surface, but it made for a rather entertaining and exciting movie. Here, I think CBS got its sticky fingers on things and turned what could have been an edge-of-your-seat thriller into your typical procedural. I figured the show would have some procedural elements, but after seeing the pilot, it's pretty clear that it's going to have very little, if anything, that isn't a procedural element. If you're into procedurals, more power to you, but I need more from a drama. If I'm never going to see that person again, I don't think I care to spend an hour finding out how he or she is involved in some random would-be crime of the week. I just don't care. That said, I do watch the occasional procedural, but that's when the cast is spectacular or the concept tweaks it such that the cases of the week have a direct effect on the regular cast. Here, we have Jim Caviezel at the center of the show who brings absolutely nothing to the role. Honestly I wouldn't even really care what he brought to the role, so long as it was something. He could have taken the Michael Westen bent, the Patrick Jane angle, hell, even the Steven Segal action approach and that would have been better. Caviezel gave me nothing to hold onto at all. It's impossible to care about a character who has no character, let alone the random events he engages in week to week. In a weird way, the case of the week was actually more interesting than the regular cast. Granted I'll never see them ever again, but Natalie Zea brought a lot more depth and acting ability to her role du jour than Caviezel did. My only thought is that the producers wanted a movie name for the role and settled on Caviezel after he blackmailed them or something. No, strike that. There's no way he'd ever do anything that interesting.

All in all, I'm extremely disappointed. The critics and I expected this to be one of the best pilots of the fall and instead we got a lackluster procedural with a terrible lead. What little supporting cast the show has is fine and all, but besides Michael Emerson, had very little to do with the pilot so it's tough to decide if they'll help temper Caviezel's crappiness. I doubt anything could do that, but the pilot didn't even give them a chance to try. Apparently Taraji P. Henson is on board as a cop or something, but she had about 2 minutes onscreen, so who knows how that's going to turn out. As is, her talents were wasted on a pilot that could have seriously benefited from them. On paper, this should have been a home run. In reality, it was shockingly dull for a show about an hired gun going about killing bad guys and preventing murders. Had a different actor been at the helm, the weaker narrative elements could have easily been excused. I'm more than happy to overlook some structural shortcomings if I'm interested in the cast. It's how I endured so many seasons of House. The medical case of the week was an afterthought. Hugh Laurie was the draw. Person of Interest has no such draw.

I guess in theory this should could turn into something more, but I honestly don't care to find out. I was so bored by the procedural nature of the show and Caviezel's vacant stares that I just kept wanting the pilot to hurry up and be over. I'm going to try to force myself to give it another week, but based on the preview for the next episode, it's going to be a whole lot of the same. Random potential crime of the week and a block of wood. Emerson deserves better. Caviezel deserves an eternity of acting classes.

When discussing this show at work, Annie offered up that at least Caviezel is attractive. Granted, a pretty face can make up for a lot of shortcomings, but I can hardly imagine the astronomical levels of divine pulchritude he would have to have to make up for his utter lack of talent. So yeah, good luck with that, Jim.

Pilot Grade: D

Thursday, September 22, 2011

TV Review: Revenge

"This is not a story about forgiveness..."

In case the title of the show was too subtle, ABC's latest drama Revenge establishes the premise right out of the gate. Thanks! It's fortunate because the rest of the pilot was more than a little murky...

Which isn't to say that it wasn't good. I imagine that the writers and producers were so knee-deep in mystery and intrigue that they couldn't view it through fresh eyes and had a hard time putting in elements that the audience would need in the right order. Or, they simply wanted the audience to be a little confused. Either way, it was slightly irksome, but ultimately came together in the end. Sort of.

Revenge stars Emily Van Camp as a woman whose life was destroyed when she was a child and who is now hellbent on puppies. I mean revenge. She returns to the Hamptons, which near as I can tell is like colonial Australia for wealthy nogoodniks, where she puts plans into motion to destroy those who ruined her life. Although the pilot fails to lay out this web of intrigue in any particularly elegant way, by the end of the pilot it has been established that her father's friends and colleagues did some bad things and set up a web of lies and deceits that put her father in prison for their crimes. Said father died some time prior to the beginning of the pilot, leaving a box of journals and letters to daughter, explaining his innocence and expressly telling his daughter to choose forgiveness. Spoiler alert. She doesn't.

The pilot opens with a line from Confucius which states, "Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves." I positively can't stand it when a show starts off with the definition of a word, like, say, "revenge," but to start off with this quote gave the pilot a nice literary flavor that really set the stage. The concept for this show is very loosely based on The Count of Monte Cristo, so it struck a nice tone. This series will clearly err more on the side of soapy thriller than a literary classic, but even if it borrows an element here and an element there, you could hardly ask for better source material. That said, I'm not sure how this concept will play out as an entire series, potentially spanning several seasons. If they play their cards write, they'll reinvent the show season to season rather than dragging out the base concept until the end of time.

The show focuses on Emily Thorn nee Amanda Clarke, played by Van Camp, who has grown up and is now unrecognizable to the obscenely wealthy backstabbers she knew as a child. The pilot flashes back and forth between her childhood, now now, and five months prior to now now. Along with that, there are child versions of various characters, different time frames to keep track of, and numerous characters, all of whom are interconnected to everyone else on the show in different, very important ways. It was a lot to keep track of and my family and I found ourselves a tad lost on several occasions, usually along the lines of, "Wait, so was that the same guy as before? Wasn't he married to that blonde woman?" I can see where this show had a hell of a lot to establish right off the bat, but it got a bit tiresome. Like I said, by the end I felt like I had a pretty firm grasp on who was who and how each person was related to everyone else, but it was a lot to take in. Were this a classic novel, we'd be 287 pages in by now, not 43 minutes. Had the pilot been crafted in a more elegant way, I think it all would have flowed together seamlessly, creating a complex web of intrigue for viewers to explore. As is, they created a web, but I kind of just felt like I got stuck in it. As the weeks progress, I'm sure it will all crystallize, but the pilot just felt a little to clunky at times and like it missed opportunities in others.

Foibles aside, I'm genuinely intrigued by this show, its premise, and the promise of twisty, naughty, knotty things to come. Again, it's hard to see how a concept like this will last for years and years, but if they play their mythology right, it could certainly keep me entertained for quite some time. The basic concept holds a lot of appeal for the gossip-mongering, vengeful side of me and I truly enjoyed watching the smirk break out on Emily's face when the pieces of her plan came into focus. While the pathos aspect has the potential to be quite riveting in its own right, the quite at the beginning tells me that the show will be examining not just the tawdry twists and turns of revenge, but the personal toll it takes as well. I'm as intrigued to see how this treacherous path affects our heroine as I am to see which rich bitch bites the big one next. I'm not entirely sure Van Camp can pull off the emotional range needed for such a role, but she did a nice job in the pilot and held her own on Everwood as well. She's truly the anchor of the show and acts as the viewer's window into this twisted mess, so she better be ready to bear the weight of the show on her shoulders. This is her story and its success or failure is hers to claim. I, for one, definitely hope she pulls it off.

Along with Van Camp, the supporting cast is quite strong, with each cast member embracing his/her role and running with it. In spite of the somber tone of the concept, I got the feeling the show knows deep down that it's a soapy drama at heart and opted not to take itself too seriously. Or at least to try. The cast is expansive (although at the rate they're going, it will likely be pared down in no time--poison will do that), so only a few got serious screentime in the pilot, but they all did a serviceable job at least and quite a nice job at best. Madeline Stowe, in particular, plays the ice queen with devilish delight, banishing her onetime best friend without a second thought. That said, it was hard to keep the no-name actors straight from place to place, time to time, relationship to relationship, so some of the story aspects lost some of their punch. I almost wish they had cast some more familiar faces. It was very easy to keep Connor Paolo straight in my head. Random J. Boatowner? Not so much. Again, that should improve over time and if I can force myself to pay better attention than I have lately. There were a lot of distractions going on when I watched this, so there's a fair chance it was very logically and clearly laid out and I was just too distracted to notice.

The pilot established a lot of people and relationships, sparking more than a little intrigue, but it also left a lot of up in the air. The fact that Emily's late father was played by James Tupper, an actual name, tells me that we'll be seeing a lot more flashbacks in the future which should help fill in the holes over time. In the original pilot, he was played by Marc Blucas, so while I don't exactly have a poster of Tupper over my bed or anything, he's a vast improvement over Blucas. Unless of course Emily's father was known for sucking the life out of a room, in which case, losing Blucas was a serious blow to the series. I'm hopeful this show goes about filling in the wholes and exposing people and motives in an effective way. Handled with kid gloves, this could be an intriguing journey through past, recent past, and present to figure out just how Emily ended up at her engagement party while her fiance was being murdered on the beach. The show bookended recent past (5 months ago) with now now, showing us where things will end up in 5 months time, then going back to fill in the blanks. As much as I loathe the "3 days earlier" trope, in this instance, I think it will prove to be most effective. The audience doesn't know if Emily's engagement is for real, if she fell for her enemy's son, if she was in on the murder, or a combination of all three. Her face is inscrutable as her fiance's murder is relayed to the crowd, so we genuinely don't know what she knows or what hand she may have played. In terms of revenge destroyed the one seeking it, I think this set up the series in a thought-provoking and titillating way. I can't say for sure how the show will get back to now now, but I'm intrigued enough to want to find out.

All in all, the pilot certainly had some issues, but I quite enjoyed it overall. I'm still skeptical about turning this concept into a multi-year series, but I've thought that about a lot of shows that have gone on to entertain me for ages. At the end of the day, reservations aside, this is a highly serialized drama, not some crap procedural, so even with its flaws, it gets a lot of points in my book. I'm really hoping it all comes together because it has a hell of a lot of potential. "Coming together" depends on a hell of a lot of variables, but a little luck, Revenge could turn into quite the twisted thriller and maybe even a psychological examination of what payback brings to the, uh, payer-backer. You know what I mean. Come on, Van Camp! You can do this!

In short, it's a total guilty pleasure with more than a few soapy elements, but that's just fine with me.

Pilot Grade: B-

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

TV Review: 2 Broke Girls and The Playboy Club

Well, Monday was a pretty pitiful day for new programming, I can tell you that much. Returning shows Castle and to a much lesser extent How I Met Your Mother were the highlights of the evening. Yes, even HIMYM showed some signs of life, although it's on probation. I'm going to take Annie's lead and give it a chance so long as they don't have two bad episodes back-to-back. Even at it's best these days, it's really more "pleasant" than anything else, but for a 20 minute distraction, that's really all I need. That said, I was no fan of Victoria the first time around. Ugh.

Anyway, on to the drivel! I, uh, mean new shows!

2 BROKE GIRLS

Oh my holy god this was painful. I had heard from several critics that it was supposed to be really good, but as it turns out, the critics were smoking massive amounts of crack at the time of viewing... Holy hell this was bad. In all honesty, I only made it 7 minutes in before I simply couldn't take it anymore (a record heretofore held by the pilot for Outsourced), so who knows? Maybe it rallied in it's last 20 minutes or something... I doubt it. Kat Dennings is charmless and has no discernible comedic chops. I only saw about a minute of her costar, so I can't really judge conclusively, but I think it's safe to say she wasn't any better. Aside from the unfunny leads, the show was also awash in tacky ethnic stereotypes that have never been funny. The show basically has Long Duk Dong in the role of horrifying Asian stereotype, Uncle Remus rounding out the offensive African American angle, and I hardly know what to say about the lascivious Russian. It was all in poor taste and was completely off-putting. I'm no politically correct prude, but if you're going to push boundaries or take stabs at people, they have to work. These did not. Such characterizations weren't funny 40 years ago, let alone now. In a modern context, it felt idiosyncratic and lame. It would be like a current comedy revolving around Three Stooges style slap stick. Ugh. Anyway, the jokes were painfully forced, the odd couple concept has been way over played (speaking of old motifs), and the cast was terrible. The only line I appreciated was because of Breaking Bad, weirdly enough. Kat's character laments the loss of the meth addict because she was such a good cleaner. Based on my wealth of knowledge about tweakers, thanks to Breaking Bad, I had to chuckle at this. It was the one and only laugh and it had more to do with another show than this one. Show fail.

Pilot Grade (well, the first 7 minutes at least): F

**Update: Having read on AV Club that the second half of the pilot was considerably better than the first, I decided to plow through the rest of the episode. Indeed, the second half was far better than the first. That doesn't mean it's a good show, but puts it at the level of simply "awful" rather than "please dear god, kill me". Baby steps.

Pilot Grade (the entire episode this time): D


THE PLAYBOY CLUB

Dear Religious Nutbags, Conservative Right-Wing Censors, and The Parents' Television Council: Maybe you should actually see a show before condemning it. I'm not saying The Playboy Club is an excellent show that is truly deserving of millions of viewers or anything, but the reason people should tune out is that it simply isn't very good, not because it's smutty or racy or licentious or whatever it is you morons think it is.

This show was tame, people. Insanely tame. I'm actually kind of surprised at just how tame it was. Any show that knew what it was doing would take the right wing condemnation and run with it (a la Gossip Girl appropriating the comments from the Parents' Television Council into their advertising), but The Playboy Club was more wholesome than any random episode of any procedural cop show that I've ever seen. The one and only sex scene, if you can really call it that, showed nothing really and was between a long-term couple who've been discussing getting married. SCANDAL! Oh sure, it's all fine and good to show women being brutally gang-raped and murdered on every episode of every procedural on TV, but The Playboy Club, with its lack of nudity, sex, foul language, and serious violence, that's going too far! Stupid, delusional hypocrites, every one of them.

Anyway, now that that's out of my system, like I said, the reason to bow out of The Playboy Club is that it's just not a very good show. The setting is the 1960s, specifically the Playboy Club and Playboy Mansion, but they seem to be set pieces rather than an actual atmosphere. Where Mad Men creates a milieu of the 60s that you get swept up in, The Playboy Club seems to have rummaged through a few thrift stores and garage sales looking for old stuff to fill the scene. I've seen more than a few critiques that his show is trying to be Mad Men, but really, they have a similar setting, but are wholly different animals in execution. Mad Men is unflinching in its portrayal of the 60s, imbuing each scene, character, and interaction with the social mores of the time. The Playboy Club casually alludes to such issues of race and gender, but isn't willing to dive in or let such things influence a scene in any substantive way.

While the atmosphere is weak, the storyline is worse. The show tries to set up a twisty, thrilling, dangerous narrative right off the bat, but doesn't bother to establish any of the characters first, so the twists and turns and suspense are totally wasted. Literally, within the first ten minutes of the pilot, main bunny Amber Heard (I haven't the slightest idea what her character name is) goes from working the floor at the Playboy Club, killing a would-be rapist in self defense, and helping main guy Eddie Cibrian dispose of the guy's body because he's apparently a murderous mobster or something. So yeah, within minutes, a man and woman I don't know and don't care about are in mortal peril with the threat of exposure hanging over their heads. Yep, don't care. If they wanted this pilot to work, they should have spent the pilot establishing this world and these people, only to have the guy's death come at the very end. If I even kind of cared about these people, I might have enjoyed the pilot more, but as is, the narrative just seems to be random things happening to pretty faces. That's simply not enough to invest in. Especially with the acting as poor as it was.

The supporting cast had a lot more going for it (with Carol Lynn being far and away the best part of the show), but not enough screentime to get me invested. It's hardly worth recalling the details, but the biggest thrills came in the realization that Simon Tam and Mr. Universe were among the cast. Sure they're wasted and all, but it was still nice to see some faces that I actually cared about. A nice change of pace, really. I found myself investing in their characters based on their past roles alone, which is not a good sign for their current show.

It wasn't the worst pilot I've ever seen before, but it just didn't have enough panache or polish to pull off this conceit. I've heard that the pilot underwent some serious retooling prior to air and I can tell. From the trailer, it looked far worse than it was. Unfortunately, such efforts may have spared The Playboy Club from the bottom of the barrel, but hardly raised it to the top of the heap. Quite frankly, I think my perceptions of the show were mostly colored by the fact that I watched this right after 2 Broke Girls. Compared to that piece of shit, this really didn't seem all that terrible, you know? I at least finished the pilot for this one.

Pilot Grade: C-

Friday, September 16, 2011

TV Review: The Secret Circle

Whenever a beloved writer or showrunner picks up a new project in the midst of his/her current project, I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, it's always exciting to see a creative team that you love producing more material, but on the other hand, you have to wonder if both shows will suffer as a result of the showrunner being spread too thin. Upon hearing that Kevin Williamson was going to be in charge of The Secret Circle, a companion piece to his Julie Plec co-project The Vampire Diaries, to say I was conflicted would be an understatement. Having now seen the fruits of his labor, I'm just as conflicted, but more hopeful.

The Secret Circle seems to operate in the same basic universe of The Vampire Diaries, but so far focuses on witches exclusively. The pilot follows Cassie Blake (played by Britt Robertson, whom you'll remember hating as Lux last year... at least I sure did) as she journeys to her mother's home town to live with her grandmother, following the, um, "accident" that killed her mother only minutes into the pilot. Upon arriving in small town Washington state (which, near as I can tell, has the highest per capita of pretty people on the planet, second only to Mystic Falls), she finds out that she actually comes from a long lineage of witches, as do 5 other teenagers in town and their parents. It's a lot of ground to cover in only 43 minutes and it made for a few misfires along the way. The pilot piles on the plot exposition and foundational elements necessary for the actual narrative to begin, establishing the six primary families involved, the universe in which the show operates (which I'm calling Mystic Falls East), the principles of magic in said universe, some of the mythology of the series, and the over-arching narrative drives that will guide the first season. Given the amount of ground they covered in such a short period of time, I'm actually pretty surprised that it came across as successfully as it did. While there were certainly aspects of the pilot that felt rushed, it took time for some small moments and presented memorable, if characters--characters that I want to know more about, even if I'm not entirely sure I'll be investing whole hog in the future. The characters have yet to be fleshed out, and after only one episode are really more superficial than substantive, but I'm intrigued enough to want to give them time to grow. At this point, the writers essentially picked one personality trait for each character to embody rather than giving a range. Some critics may pooh-pooh such a one-note portrayal, but when you have that many characters to establish that quickly, I think it's best to pick one feature for viewers to hold onto and worry about imbuing layers later on. Had they presented each character in his/her wide range of facets, the pilot would have felt even more rushed than it did. They piqued my interest with the basics and I'm more than happy to wait for more substance and depth later on.

Presenting characters in simplified terms comes with mixed results, however. While I understand and appreciate stripping characters down to their basic constitution for the sake of the pilot, each character's likability weighs heavily on which single dimension is chosen. Cassie is given the most range, what with her being the central character, but I found her to be one of the least engaging characters from the pilot. As mentioned above, I hated her as Lux in Life Unexpected for a number of reasons, most of which have carried over to The Secret Circle. Apparently it wasn't just her old character that I despised. It's her. It's difficult to pinpoint what exactly irks me about her, but it's ever-present. I guess she just comes across as a whiny sad-sack whether her character warrants it or not. Her mother recently died in The Secret Circle, so her moodiness is consistent with her character arc, but that doesn't make her any more endearing. Any number of actors can pull off the brooding in a way that makes me love them, but Britt is just a total turn-off. She comes across as one of those people who's constantly pissy, but who isn't snarky or edgy enough to make it work. It's as though it's the world's constant job to make amends and apologize for her life not going exactly the way she wants it to. Hell, I saw her in an interview and couldn't believe she was the same humorless wet blanket she is in her roles. Sigh. I'm really hoping she grows on me over time, what with her being the main focus of the show, but at this point, I was kind of hoping the car fire would win.

Were this a one-woman show starring Cassie, I certainly wouldn't be soldiering on, but luckily, the other cast members hold a fair bit of promise. It's hard to know exactly what these characters will be like in the long run because from the pilot, they fall into very specific types, particularly the teenagers. Along with pretty sad-sack Cassie, we have sweet, sensitive Adam, dismissive badboy Nick, mega-bitch Faye, twinset-wearing type A personality Diana, and token minority contestant Melissa (who, aside from being the only non-white character on the entire show, near as I can tell, had very little screentime in the pilot--she was essentially Faye's submissive sidekick at this point). Brass tacks, there's not a lot of depth yet, but I appreciated that the writers gave me specific personality traits to latch onto so that I could remember who was who. It's to the writers' credit that I remembered all their names without trying and could keep them all straight in my head. There were about a dozen major characters to establish in the pilot, so that's no easy feat. To the show's discredit, I liked the second-string characters far more than Cassie, and in particular, feel more invested in the parents than the kids. That said, until the writers flesh out the cast, I only have one impression of them and that impression isn't always good. Faye, in particular, practically smothers you with her role as sadistic rebel bitch in a way that felt incredibly forced and disingenuous. She more than any other seemed like a cardboard cutout of a "type" they wanted in the show and will benefit the most from some extra dimensions. Even as ham-fisted as her portrayal was, I'm still more intrigued by her than by Cassie. This show is supposed to be a companion to TVD? I think we found our Elena. Only less endearing... Wow, let that sink in.

The other teenagers hold more promise, with Diana in particular, striking a nice note. I immediately like her and in spite of her basic presentation in the pilot, felt like she had more depth than the others. The fact that I liked her so much poses a problem for the will-they-or-won't-they romantic set-up between Cassie and Adam, who is Diana's boyfriend. On the one hand, I like Diana more, so the thought of anyone choosing Cassie over her is off-putting at best, but on the other hand, Adam is played by Heroes alum Thomas Dekker, so maybe Diana would be better off... I don't hate Dekker the way I hate Britt Robertson, but he just didn't really seem to pop onscreen that I would I would expect the male lead to. I'm hopeful that as these characters grow on me, I'll be more invested in their romantic entanglements and whatnot, but for these two, it's going to take a hell of a lot for me to pull for them as a couple.

While the teenage contingent is obviously the primary focus of the show, for me, the real draw is the parents. Maybe I'm just getting old, maybe it's that they have a longer history and are more knowledgeable of their own mythology, but I found them to be much more intriguing. Gale Harold was the real star of the show for me and it's not just because I adored Brian Kinney on Queer as Folk. The pilot opens with his character Charlie using supernatural forces to kill Cassie's mother. It was honestly a hell of a way to open the show and drew me in instantly. His character is deliciously evil, but charming and casual at the same time. I don't know if you know me, but that's my kind of character. More than anything though, it was his use of magic that I found to be the most effective and, well, magical. While the teenagers would simply think an event into existence or earnestly ask something happen (seriously, you're just going to ask the rain to stop? "Stop this storm! Please?! Oh, you're mean."), Charlie's magic had a bent to it that I found really appealing and, in the world of the show, pretty terrifying. In the opening sequence, he's seen pouring water from a bottle onto the ground. My first thought was whether or not it was actually some sort of flammable material that he would light on fire or if part of his powers including using water as a conductor for other forces. As it turned out, he used the water from the bottle to connect with the water from Cassie's mother's sink, kind of like an object voodoo doll. The same goes for the matches he struck, causing the mother's kitchen to ignite more and more forcefully with each strike. That sequence, in conjunction with the relative silliness of the teenagers approach to magic got me wondering if the rules are different for different witches, if it's a generational thing, or if the fact that the teenagers form a complete circle is what makes the difference between needing a conductor and being able to will the clouds to start storming without a second thought. The fact that I was invested enough to start thinking about these things is a good sign for the series as a whole. A lot of the magic was fairly cheesy for the teenagers at this point, chanting dorky sentences and staring at something till it gave in, but I'm hopeful for better in the future. If there's one thing viewers learned from TVD, it's that cheesy elements can be phased out quickly and effectively (remember the crow? and the fog? and the diaries?). So let it be with The Secret Circle. If I could make one recommendation for the show (aside from retroactively casting Kristen Bell as Cassie, circa her Veronica Mars days), it would be to fully embrace Charlie's brand of spellcasting. The most effective and terrifying scene of the pilot was when Charlie makes Adam's dad start to drown while they were simply talking. It was honestly pretty chilling to hear Charlie ask if Adam's father knew what it felt like to drown, then to see exactly what that would look like, water spewing from the father's mouth as he gasps for air. Gale Harold did a lovely job with the role, making his character truly menacing without being completely one-note. More of that, please.

Did I mention that Charlie and Adam's father were talking to one another at the Boathouse Grill? Which is exactly the same as Mystic Grill, only more boaty? Okay, I realize this show is supposed to pair well with The Vampire Diaries, but in a number of ways, I wish The Secret Circle weren't so obviously conceived as a "companion piece." I love TVD and am happy to see that universe expanded, but holy hell, even the title cards look the same. What's that you say? You're family history is supernatural and mysterious and has been studiously preserved in a leatherbound journal? That doesn't sound familiar at all! Seriously, throw in a few shamelss product placements for Bing and they're barely distinguishable at times. Aside from the universe of the show having a similar milieu, there were so many story elements that overlapped with TVD that it almost got oppressive at times. It was mostly little things and occasional thematic elements, but the familiarity bred some contempt. I realize that the creative teams have a number of key players in common and that the source materials come from the same source, but having so many elements in common made the writing almost seem lazy at times. Hell, I'm pretty sure that family journal was the same prop used on TVD. Yay for recycling? As with TVD before it, I'm hopeful that The Secret Circle will quickly separate itself from the shackles of the source material and will emerge as its own animal. Without Ian Somerhalder on board, I'm not sure how successful they'll be, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

This pilot had a lot of off-putting elements, but I think it has a lot of potential. The creative team is strong and its produced by Craft and Fain (which I'm sure means nothing to you, but believe me, it matters), so I think they have a nice shot at making this work. It all really depends on where they go with the major character profiles. The foundational elements certainly have what it takes, so for me, it all boils down to characters and execution. If they can't flesh out the personalities on the show, or if the actors can't pull it off, they're doomed. I think they'll de-cheese the magic pretty quickly, so that's not really one of my main concerns. They've shown that they can make the magic come across incredibly well with Charlie, so it should only be a matter of time before that carries over to the rest of the cast. These niggling elements aside, I'm genuinely intrigued by the mythology of the series. I don't know what exactly happened in the past of why the parents are hell-bent on getting Cassie into their sights, but I'd like to. Where the story goes with this will ultimately determine how invested I become, but for now, my interests have been piqued, even in spite of some weaker aspects in the pilot.

All in all, I'm cautiously optimistic. While in my heart of hearts I'm hoping The Secret Circle is a companion to The Vampire Diaries in terms of starting off weak and then becoming insanely awesome, that's a hell of bar. Being as Damon-less as they are, I'm not sure they have any real possibility of rising to those heights, but I still think the show has enough going for it that it could really draw me in in the long run. If they can casually 86 the cheesier aspects and develop the characters, we could have a winner on our hands down the road, even in spite of the Britt Robertson of it all. Seriously, why are people casting her?

Pilot Grade: C+