My New Luvah

TV and I have been married for a very long time. We've stuck by one another through thick and thin. Our marriage is still going strong, don't get me wrong, but since TV has decided "we're on a break," I decided to take my dedication elsewhere until TV decides to come back.

Long story short?

I got a Wii for Christmas.

Sigh. Of late I've replaced the ailment "Puzzler's Back" with "Wii Fingers." A deadly affliction in its own right... I should really call it "Mario Kart Fingers," what who's splitting hairs.

Awwh, Mario Kart. How I've missed you. I haven't raced my little heart out on Mario Kart since about the fifth grade, as I recall. Back when the Super NES was state of the art. My my, how things have changed. Slash stayed exactly the same. The graphics are more impressive, the options are boundless, but at the end of the day, I'm still yelling at the little cartoon figures on the screen to "GO FASTER, DAMMIT!" and cursing my opponents to the tune of "HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, MARIO!?" and "YOU DARE TO RED SHELL ME?! DIE PRINCESS PEACH! DIE!" It sounds a lot like that, only with considerably more swearing... Let's just say I should really compete against drunken sailors... I had all but forgotten how stressful and addictive this little gem really is.

Misty water-colored memories...

Anyway, it has kind of taken over my live for the past several days. It's been a nostalgic trip down memory lane and a mind-bending, eye-sight warping reminder of why I shouldn't play video games... En route to the chiropractor today, I could literally hear the background music in my head and even that sound the game makes when you hit one of the cubes. Sad. Very sad. I've only been playing for a few days, but I've already unlocked all the additional courses and most of the additional characters and vehicles. But, like the pathetic sense of accomplishment I gain from puzzles (I finished the Klimt, by the way--holy hell that was the hardest puzzle I've ever put together), unlocking crap on Mario Kart is fulfilling in some sort of sad, twisted way. But, again, with TV out of the picture for the next few weeks, I have no other choice of mistress-- er, mister? Why exactly isn't there a male equivalent of "mistress," hmmm?

Reflections on Mario Kart that was and Mario Kart that is:

• I still hate Rainbow Road as much as I ever did. Good god, what sadist came up with that course?! It's a lot shinier and more spectacular in its current incarnation, but that doesn't make it any less fall-off-the-edgy. Bah!
• Ghost Valley 2 is likewise welcome to bite me. Although no where near the aggravation that Rainbow Road is, it's been one of those courses tha elicits a groan since I was but a wee fifth grader.
• Back in the day, I seem to recall playing as Yoshi on a regular basis. Nowadays? Not so much. I play a lot of Luigi with the Mach Bike (or Sugarscoot) and any character for whom the Magikruiser is an option. Even if that character is as reprehensible as Baby Peach.
• There are some hair-pin turns that I simply cannot make. I had to accept that fact back then and was rather woefully reminded of it now. That Mario Circuit with the Legos? Yeah, there are a couple of turns that I just kind of have to hope for the best...
• I really hate it when Bowzer and Donky Kong bump me off the road. Particularly when the "off road" is filled with lava or something...
  
• The squid ink is annoying as all hell. Definitely not an improvement on the game.
• The POW is also more than a little annoying. Grrr...
• But nowhere near as annoying as that stupid blue winged shell that takes out the racer in first place. As I am often in first place, it just seems downright mean. Especially when I'm mere inches from the finish line. Not cool, electronically programmed competitors. Not cool.
• Green shells are useless. USELESS, I TELLS YA! I wish I could just casually opt out and get something better. IF they hit anyone, it's usually me. Blah!
  
• That Maple Treeway has lovely, soothing, cruising through the countryside music that kind of creepily belies the fact that you'll be falling off a branch in the very near future.
• I hate the Special Cup. It should really be called the Special Needs Cup. As in, I think I'm going to need a set of effing wings to survive some of these...
• That Mountain View Highway course with all the cars and trucks and crap? Oh dear lord, that's terrifying! I've gotten pretty good at it, but it still evokes a visceral, "OH MY GOD! We're gonna die!" reaction when you get hit by a car...
  
• I really love that lightning bolt. Such a great feature. It gives me a sense of power that I just don't have in real life. You know, what with being able to miniaturize people I don't like. That would nice to have...
• I think I'd like to marry Bullet Bill. Never has such a comforting presence come into my life and magically driven my car for me and knocked my enemies into oblivion. Dreamy.

So this is what my life has been reduced to... I keep hoping I'll just unlock everything so I can feel like I can stop. As is, I'm having an obsessive compulsive reaction to the game... Gotta keep playing... Must. Unlock. More. FEATURES! Fortunately I casually haven't been to work in two weeks so I've been able to more fully devote myself to the important things in life.

In other video game news, I really, really, really suck at Zelda. I only ever played the game a couple of times back in the day, so I'm totally out of my depth now. Good god, have you always had to waste so much time talking to people?! Why do people play this game?! I assume it gets more fighty and less talky, but at this point? I think I'll go bump Koopa Troopa into some lava or something, thanks...

Here's the Mario Kart I remember... albeit with someone slightly more skilled at the helm.



Seriously?! I can't even stay on the track, let ALONE jump the corners!

Someone has too much time on his hands... Wow.

Sci Fi Overload

Hey, peeps. I've been rather remiss about writing lately. Between most of my shows going on hiatus and my work life royally sucking at the moment, it just hasn't been a priority. I've spent my evenings working on jigsaw puzzles. Yes, jigsaw puzzles. And yes, I'm aware of how very sad that is. You want sad? I can crank out a 1500 to 2000 piece puzzle in about 3 days. This generally involves sitting on the floor for several hours at a time, hunched over my puzzle, which in turn results in a condition I affectionately call "puzzler's back." (You know, like maid's knee, tennis elbow, or dancer's hip.) Ann and gals at work basically couldn't stop laughing for about 15 minutes when I told them of my affliction--resulting in several cases of "laugher's side"). I had honestly never really thought of it as funny because I use it so often, but when I step outside the situation, I can see that's it's funny in that "ohhh, you gave it a name" kind of way.

I have my chiropractor on standby.

Anyway, this post is actually supposed to be about my science fiction shows, not puzzles (had ya fooled, didn't I). My sci fi shows are on a sliding scale these days, with none of them performing at the level I'd expect.

I miss Firefly. (As I shed a tear for the Browncoats...)

DOLLHOUSE

As any of you who watch this show know, Dollhouse has been officially cancelled, but the brass at Fox (still atoning for Firefly) have agreed to air the entire 13 episode order. They've been airing two episodes on Fridays, which is a lot to take in, but also nice to have around sans anything else. I haven't seen this most recent Friday's outings, but the two episodes aired their first week back were surprisingly good. I'm not as invested in the show as I was in season 1, and no episode can hold a candle to "Epitaph One", but I'm really enjoying where the show is going these days. The addition of Alexis Denisof (aka Wesley Windham-Price) as a politician seemingly hell-bent on bringing down the dollhouse has been excellent. I'd be lying if I said I didn't see his reveal as a doll coming, but it was still pretty satisfying to watch. Also, having Summer Glau back in the Whedonverse was a nice addition as well. Although her acting is always verging on the "doll state," she did a really great job and I hope they bring her back for more episodes (you know, before it goes off the air in a few weeks). Same goes for Amy Acker... I think the reason this season started off a little slow is that Whiskey high-tailed it out of there early on. I can't imagine she won't be resurfacing sometime before the finale (let's face it, her storyline easily has the most loose ends which will need to be tied up), but I find myself wishing she were central to just about every episode. Sigh. At least Alpha's coming back soon. :)

The episodes have been less rigidly "story of the week" as well, which is greatly appreciated. This may come as a shock, but I actually don't care what wacky antics Echo is up to this week unless it matters in the grander scheme of things. The engagements were only part of the problem. When half your cast can't remember what happened in last week's episode, it's kind of hard to build anything solid or employ any substantive story arcs. Given the self-imposed limitations of the concept, I'm shocked the show has worked as well as it has. That said, I really wish Joss and company had thought of some other conceit, some modified path for these characters to take that would have allowed for growth in a more active fashion. That Echo is really starting to remember things is encouraging, but at the same time, her fellow dolls (most of whom I care about more than Echo) are still wandering around like mindless children most of the time.

Anyway, my issues with the concept are beside the point this late in the game. I have enjoyed Dollhouse and expect the rest of the season will be quite satisfying, but I'm also glad Joss and company (did you notice that was Marissa playing Kilo?) will be able to move on to other projects (most notably the Dr. Horrible sequel (eee!)). As far as my slate of sci fi is concerned, Dollhouse is still the strongest contender.

FLASHFOWARD

Oh, FlashForward... I had such high hopes for you. Okay, that's being a bit dramatic, but the show really hasn't knocked it out of the park as one would hope. As with V (which we'll get to later), the concept of the show really only allows for one storyline. Granted the show takes a different bent on that one story and focuses on different characters in different episodes, but at the end of the day, you're stuck with one big giant endpoint: the blackout. I've been sufficiently intrigued by the blackout, who is behind it, why it happened, what implications it may have, etc., but I've also found myself feeling bogged down. Again, as with V, I keep thinking this conceit is better suited to a miniseries or a movie than a standard series. Each episode seems to be desperately trying to flesh out characters I don't care about regarding an event that I've heard about all episode every episode since the beginning of the series. Not a good sign.

I've kept up with the show because the base concept really is intriguing, but in execution, the show is falling short. This glimpse into the future has added a gravity and an earnestness to even the simplest of interactions and it's just not working to well in the long run. Every scene is dripping with too much emotion and destiny and fate and crap, and subsequently, self-importance. I'm having a hard time really caring about any of the characters and even kinda sorta hate Joseph Fiennes' role. His character is unerringly dour, stern, and humorless, and I just can't bring myself to rally around a wet blanket who doesn't even have cynicism or snark to fall back on. I'm vaguely invested in the supporting cast, but at the end of the day, I just don't really care what happens to them. If what's-his-face gets killed in March, I'm unconcerned. If that one girl gets pregnant or not (a storyline which is saccharine and grating at best), I really don't care. That dude looking for his the Japanese girlfriend, the bearded guy and his military daughter, that girl who drowns... don't care, really don't care, seriously who is that girl? It's not the kind of response a show would hope for.

Again, the over-arching story is what keeps me going, but even that's starting to wind down for me. Much of the mystery behind the blackout has already been exposed, and while it's interesting, I've got enough of the story that I think I'd be okay not finding out the rest. The heavy-handed themes about life and destiny and all that crap were fairly intriguing early on, but I'm really starting to not care. It's not a terrible show or anything, but from what I can see, my sentiments echo most people's. The show's ratings are fair, but nothing to write home about, and the numbers for the winter finale were at a series low. That, coupled with the fact that ABC cut the show's order by an episode and have put the show on hiatus until March and I think it's safe to say it won't be getting a second season. I predict that when the show returns in the spring, no one will be watching. Also, this hiatus seriously throws off their timeline... I'm starting to wonder what exactly the plan is, but really? Who cares. (This is one of those times when there needs to be a punctuation mark for when it's technically a question, but is really a statement.)

V

Speaking of disappointing, hey look! It's V! When I first heard about this show, I had very high hopes. The pilot was decent enough, but no where near the tour de force I had anticipated. It's really much better suited to a miniseries, which, wouldn't you know it, is exactly where it started. Oy. Like FlashForward, the show has set itself up so that it can really only have one storyline. This kind of high concept can absolutely work, but in both these cases, it's just kind of falling apart.

To really sum up my thoughts on V, all I really need to do is disclose the fact that I've only seen the first 2 1/2 episodes. Oh sure, I've re-watched Glee's oeuvre about a dozen times, but can't bring myself to get caught up on V. It's hard to exactly quantify why the show isn't clicking with me, but rest assured, it isn't. I care even less about these characters than I do the FlashForwarders. Elizabeth Mitchell's character? Blah. Her son? Mega blah. That guy who's actually a V--you know that guy with the curly haired fiance? Ugh. Scott Wolf? Cheesetastic (and not in a good way). The priest? Couldn't care less. The only people I find myself concerned with are Morena Baccarin and Alan Tudyk, and that's more as a result of my allegiance to the Whedonverse than anything else. I keep wanting to like the shows Whedon alums find themselves signed onto, but it just isn't working.

Like FlashForward, ABC has cut the show's order by an episode. Not catastrophic or anything, but not a good sign either. That coupled with the plan to air the show in blocks (of 4 or so episodes each) and I get the feeling ABC isn't completely behind the show. I'm kind of glad they're on hiatus though, because maybe I'll actually get around to getting caught up. Of course, they've been sitting on my DVR for weeks now, so I'm not holding my breath.

Overall, sci fi on TV (at least basic network TV) is a dying art. Fringe in hanging in there (and actually showing some gains after quite a long spell of decreases in ratings), but only time will tell if it gets another season pick-up. The way things are playing out at the moment, I'm guessing Fringe will survive, V has a chance, and FlashForward is as good as dead. Its never been the most common of genres, but it seems to be struggling more and more. Battlestar Galactica was very successful (in its own way), but again, that's wasn't basic network TV. I think sci fi is more of a niche genre and has its best chance of survival on cable. It's really hit or miss for me, but lately? It's been a hell of a lot more miss than hit.

I'm hoping the current slate of strugglers doesn't dissuade programmers from picking up sci fi in the future, but I'm willing to wager it takes a toll. Although, given the new shows sci fi had to offer up this year, I can't say I'd be totally heartbroken.

Here's hoping for better things to come...

Another one bites the dust... (Make that several.)

As December descends upon us (holy hell, it's December already?!) and the networks go on hiatus to large degree, decisions about who will stay and who will go have mostly been made. The fates of shows generally have to be determined by this point so that networks can gear up for mid-season replacements like Human Target, Past Life, and Day One. While it's nice to know who will and will not survive, that doesn't solve the problem of having a whole lot of nothing to watch during December and the better part of January--you know, the coldest and most dismal months when all you want to do is stay home and watch TV... Oy. This year will be even worse for the majority of network shows thanks to the Olympics and American Idol. Shows like Glee and Fringe won't be back till April.

So, until January comes and brings back Burn Notice (on 1/21--saints be praised!), Psych (1/27--which is a Wednesday, so yeah, that'll suck), Leverage (1/13--which was a bit shaky in season 1, but totally won me over with the first half of season 2) and various others, I'll just have to watch History International and the spate of screwed up people on A & E (seriously, between Intervention and Hoarders, you can't not walk away feeling a bit better about yourself and considerably worse about humanity in general). History International is one of the best networks out there. If you've been underwhelmed by the History Channel proper, you're not alone, but don't take that prejudice out on History International, which is excellent. Seriously, all the History Channel has is random crap and a whole bunch of World War II. If you're looking for anything beyond that, you'll need to switch over to History International. I watched a show on the War of 1812 last night which was superb. (Just when you thought I couldn't possibly get nerdier, here we are...) Honestly though, I'm continually amazed at how interesting history actually is versus how mind-meltingly dull it was in school. I don't know what history teachers do to make it as bland as they do, but it's a sad commentary on our public schooling system. Not that I will ever have children (saints be praised, yet again!), but if hypothetically I did, I would never ever send them to a public school in the US. It was a waste of time when I went through it and it's only gotten worse since. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions, but by and large, I learned a whole lot of nothing in school, and yet was somehow an excellent student.

Moving on (finally, right?), here's how shows are stacking up as far as being saved or cancelled is concerned. (I'm picking up roughly where I left off, so this list will only contain shows which haven't already been referenced here. It also doesn't include obvious pick-ups like House or Grey's Anatomy.)

PICK-UPS (FOR A FULL SEASON, ANOTHER SEASON, OR FOR EXTRA EPISODES)

• FLASH FORWARD (full season)
  This show started off kind of equivocally for me, but I erred on the side of potential winner. I'm rather enjoying the show, but as with V, there's really only one angle the show can have... In spite of this, the show still has me invested and the more that is unraveled, the more interested I become, but I'm not exactly on pins and needles waiting for the next episode to air. I'll certainly keep up with it through this season, but I have a sneaking suspicion it won't get picked up for next season... The ratings haven't been awful, but they're a bit below where ABC would like them. I think it all depends on whether ABC's mid-season bears any fruit...
  
  
• THE CLEVELAND SHOW (full season)
  As you can now clearly see, the order of list is not based on my interest in the show or the show's quality... I'm just listing these in order of when I heard that they had been picked up.
  
  
• CASTLE (full season)
  Yay! There were those out there who didn't think Castle would pull through, but I kept the faith. The fact that ABC's fall line-up hasn't performed quite as consistently as hoped certainly helped the matter, but now that Dancing with the Stars is over and Castle will have a new lead-in, things could get dicey. It's been picked up for a full season, but unless the numbers stay where they are (for the most part), it will likely be on the bubble for a season 3 renewal. Here's hoping!
  
  
• THE VAMPIRE DIARIES (full season)
  Okay, I was underwhelmed with the teen-angstiness of this show at first, but I have to admit, it's actually gotten pretty good and I'm totally sucked in. As always, this is mostly due to Ian Somerhalder, but in a nice change of pace, the rest of the cast is kind of growing on me as well. It has the best ratings on the CW, so a full-season pick-up was a no brainer. It will undoubtedly be picked up for a second season as well (unless the CW folds entirely), so have no fear.
  
  
• MELROSE PLACE (+5 episodes)
  The numbers for this show haven't been very good, but the CW ordered a few extra scripts so that Heather Locklear could come back and hopefully save the sinking ship. The CW doesn't have a whole lot going for it these days (as opposed to the good old days when it had shows with huge numbers? We'll call those the WB days...), so it has to take what it can get. Hopefully the relative failure of this sucker will dissuade the network from remaking any other nineties shows.
  
  
• TOP CHEF MASTERS (another season)
  This show wasn't as riveting as I had hoped, but it was all right. It got quite good toward the end, and it was pretty satisfying to see some of these chefs who had skewered Top Chef contestants in the past get skewered themselves. Nice.
  
  
• IN TREATMENT (another season)
  I've never seen this one and henceforth have very little to say about it. Ummm... good for them?
  
  
• COMMUNITY (full season)
  Yay! This is easily one of my favorite new shows of the fall and I dare say my favorite new comedy (it's a close call between this and Modern Family, which has also been picked up). Joel McHale never ceases to amuse me--and on a semi-related note, when did he become a looker? I never thought of him as a bad looking guy or anything, but until Community, I never really thought of him as an attractive guy either. Turns out Missy was right all along... :)
  
  
• PARKS AND RECREATION (full season)
  I gave up on this show after a lackluster first season, but from what I'm hearing, its second season has been awesome. I keep trying to put it back on my regular rotation, but it just doesn't seem to happen. Maybe someday...
  
  
• MERCY (full season)
  Oh dear god, NBC, just give up already! Jeff Zucker (the current head of NBC and resident dumbass) needs to be drawn and quartered for what he's done to this network. It's just pathetic and sad when a crap-fest like Mercy gets picked up on any network, let alone a one-time heavy hitter like NBC. The network has been circling the drain since he took over and just seems to defy plausibility by getting worse when think it simply can't get worse. Oy. The halcyon days of ER, Friends, and Seinfeld are definitely gone and if days could spin in a grave, they would be.
  
  
• AMERICAN DAD (uh... full season?)
  I don't even know enough about this show to know if it's currently in the middle of a season and has been picked up for a full season or if it's been picked up for another season to come...
  
  
• SOUTHLAND (it's complicated)
  What's that you say? Southland has been picked up? But I thought you just said it had been cancelled? Well, here's the deal. NBC axed this promising returning show (thanks again, Zucker!) before it even premiered its second season. Well, amid the fervor this sparked, TNT has picked up the show (in a manner of speaking). From what I hear, TNT will air all 13 produced episodes and then decide if it's worth ordering more episodes. It'll really hinge on ratings whether or not any new episodes are produced. At least they'll get to air what they've already filmed, right?
  
  
• DANCE YOUR ASS OFF (another season)
  This most exploitive of weight loss shows will be back for another round. As shameless as it was, it was kind of interesting to watch (you know, like a train wreck).
  
  
• ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE (+5 episodes)
  To understand why the hell CBS would order more episodes of this horrid show you'd really need to be pretty attuned to how TV works and I'm simply not in the mood to explain it all. It's a terrible show with so-so ratings, but it's a half-hour comedy, so it got a reprieve. Comedies are cheap to produce and have to come in pairs is the short answer. Blah.
  
  
• JONAS (another season)
  Yeah, apparently the Jonas brothers have a TV show. Who knew? This is just to prove that I receive all manner of TV news, whether I want to hear it or not... (I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit...)
  
  
• THE FORGOTTEN (+5 episodes)
  Okay, this one comes as a bit of a quandary to me. The ratings aren't so good and the show is even worse. So why then did ABC order 5 more episodes? All I can think is that it needed a slot filler until mid-season or after the Olympics and didn't want to have to come up with something original. Also, ABC has been trying to get into the crime procedural racket for some time now, I suspect, so they're probably more willing to give this one more time to magically build a real audience.
  
  
• PSYCH and BURN NOTICE (another season-s)
  These were obvious pick-ups, but I figured I'd list them anyways. :)
  
  
• LIE TO ME (full season)
  The initial order was for 3 more episodes, but Fox finally manned up and gave them a full order. I really hated this show at first, but with a new showrunner at the helm this season, it's gotten much MUCH better. It'll never be a top tier contender, but it's a decent slot filler and I'm pleased that it got picked-up. It'll certainly be on the bubble come the end of the season, and unless it improves its ratings and retains more of its House lead-in audience, it could be in some serious trouble.

CANCELLED (BOTH OFFICIALLY AND UNOFFICIALLY)

• TRAUMA (it's complicated)
  Okay, so here's yet another complicated deal at the hands of NBC. Officially, it's been cancelled. But, in light of the fact that NBC has a whole lot of nothing to replace it, they've actually ordered a few more scripts. You can see where it was difficult to figure out which column to put this one in. It's not a bad show, but the ratings really need to be better to justify a show with this kind of budget. Unless the ratings magically spike, it'll remain officially cancelled, even if they're technically producing more episodes. (In news that practically no one but me would care about, the blonde lead on the show is the younger sister of Jamie Barber (aka Apollo). That wasn't interesting at all, was it...).
  
  
• NUMB3RS (officially ending its run (-6 episodes))
  The show has been informed that this is its final season and that the total episode order has been cut by 6. I've only ever seen a couple of episodes, and was never that enthralled, but it has a Whedonverse alum at the helm, so I have to be a bit sad. I'm hearing that viewers will definitely get closure and that the writers are crafting this season intentionally to wrap things up.
  
  
• EASTWICK (unofficially, but basically dead)
  No official word has come down yet (that I've come across), but this sucker is basically a goner. A few wayward fan campaigns have sprung up, but from what I'm hearing, nothing is going to save this one. I'm, uh, crushed? Yeah, that's it.
  
  
• HANK (officially (and mercifully))
  This was really a foregone conclusion, but it's nice to see that this steaming pile of horrible has officially been given the axe. This sucker never should have been greenlit in the first place... wow.
  
  
• DOLLHOUSE (officially and unsurprisingly)
  This comes as no surprise to anyone, given the abysmal ratings, and in the end, it's probably for the best. As much as I enjoy the show, it seems to be spinning its wheels as a result of some inherent design flaws that the second season simply couldn't overcome. "Epitaph One" gave us all some hope, but at the end of the day, you just can't have a cast of characters who don't remember what happened last week. In clear penance for what they did to Firefly, the new brass at Fox has assured fans that all 13 episodes will air. They'll be airing two at a time for the month of December and then polish things off in January.
  
  
• RAISING THE BAR (officially)
  This legal drama started off strong on TNT, but ultimately sank. I gave it a shot when it first premiered, but I wasn't impressed and kind of annoyed in fact. I won't miss it, that's for sure. Looks like Mark Paul Gosseler's improved hair simply couldn't improve the ratings... Heh.
  
  
• THREE RIVERS (officially)
  And the Alex O'Laughlin lovers shed yet another tear... This cancellation comes as no surprise, but I'm sure it still stings those Moonlight cultists out there. Alex can do better, peeps, I promise. This was a terrible show with deservedly terrible ratings. I have heard that the initial order of 13 episodes will be produced, but there's no word yet on whether or not they'll ever air. As of now, the show has been pulled from the schedule and will be replaced with NCIS or other crime procedural reruns, so my money's on "no."

And that my friends is how the cookie crumbles. I'll keep you apprised of any new pick-ups and cancellations as they come, but until the mid-season starts up, there probably won't be any news in this regard for a good long while. I am, however, getting pretty excited for the mid-season to start up so I have some new shows to review. The drought it kind of killing me...

And just what exactly did Alexander Graham Bell do to you!?

Well, last night was the final episode for the dancers to perform in their original pairs on So You Think You Can Dance. Tonight, two more will be cut and we'll finally have the top ten in hand. I have to tell ya, when the top twenty were revealed, I never in a million years thought I'd be pulling for the couples I'm pulling for right now... People I hated have somehow become my favorites and people I thought I'd love have already been eliminated.

Of course, my hatred for Mollee runs as deep and true as ever, so I guess some things never change...

Anyway, here's what I thought of last night's performances:

RYAN AND ELLENORE
I'm not totally sure when it happened, but I think this is my favorite couple. I know, I know, I'm as shocked as you are. I didn't know anything about Ellenore at the beginning of the competition and what I knew of Ryan I didn't particularly like, but these two have knocked it out of the park every single week (with the exception of their hip-hop routine, which I think had a lot more to do with the lameness of the routine itself rather than the way they danced it) and I last night I found myself really pulling for them. Their Lindy-hop was wonderful. I'm a sucker for that kind of dancing and have a certain affection for that time period, so I was thrilled when they nailed it. As much as I enjoyed their first dance of the evening, however, it was their Broadway number that cemented my allegiance. I only started watching this show in season 5, so I haven't have a ton of time with it, but what I've seen of their Broadway numbers I haven't enjoyed at all--and I'm a person who loves Broadway! I'm a Broadway baby through and through, but the performances on this show have just kind of, well, sucked. Based on Asuka and Vitolio's weird as hell clown director number, Evan and Melissa's tacky wedding piece, Phillip and Jeanine's Singin' in the Rain mishap (mostly due to Phillip, let's face it), and Kayla and Kupono's lackluster West Side Story number, I was really starting to think that Broadway might just suck. As it turns out, it's not Broadway dancing that sucks, it's Tyce D'iorio that sucks. Seriously, his routines have always felt a little flat to me and you can always tell that the judges are just trying desperately not to criticize the choreography (because apparently that's illegal or something), but it's true. Don't get me wrong, the dancers clearly didn't take to the style very well either, but I think it mostly hinges on the crappiness of the routines. Well, back on point, last night's kickass Razzle Dazzle routine was amazing. (Could that be because Tyce had nothing to do with it? Methinks, yes.) It reminded me of why I love Broadway so much. Ryan is just an excellent partner through and through. It's so nice to see a guy who can do all the lifts so effortlessly that you don't see them coming and you don't feel the strain. Along with that, he totally, totally embraces his characters and last night was no exception. For as wonderful a job as he did, it was Ellenore who did the major ass kicking. Her movements were perfectly timed to the music and the character she portrayed was flawless. Ellenore transforms herself into whomever she needs to be and with a support system like Ryan, she can do no wrong. I'll be pretty bummed to see this pairing break up because they work so well together and really jump into each routine with both feet. It really sneaked up on me, but like I said, I found myself really pulling for them last night, and it kind of surprised me.

ASHLEIGH AND JAKOB
Speaking of surprises, I went into this season expecting this pair to completely fall apart, mostly due to Ashleigh. Not only has she come through every single week, but the two of them seem to make each other better dancers. Jakob is an insanely talented dancer to begin with, so it was nice to see him need to lean on her skills a bit last night with the cha-cha routine. Now, I was one of those people who hated Ashleigh at first and didn't think she'd survive a single week. The primary reason I hated her was because of those stupid faces she'd make while dancing. Well, as it turns out, apparently those faces are part of they style! Who knew?! I really have to take back a lot of my criticisms now that I know that blue steel expressions, fake surprise, and cheesy pointing weren't really her idea at all, but are actually tennets of Latin ballroom dancing. I seriously had no idea. Anyway, their cha-cha was fantastic and it was a hell of a lot of fun to see Ashleigh doing what she does best. I thought Jakob actually did a pretty great job for having never done Latin ballroom before. The routine was fun and fast and well choreographed. Nice. I also really loved their Sonya-style Jazz routine. I'm not a big fan of contemporary dancing ("But look how much emotion I'm pretending to have whilst flailing my arms around like a mental patient!"), and this Jazz routine was a little closer to that I'd generally prefer, but this routine really made it work. It was slow, but powerful and engaging, even it's quietest of moments. It was really a great antithesis to the cha-cha and between these two routines, you got to see just what kind of a range this couple has. As with Ashleigh's husband and partner, I'm not sure when it happened, but I think this couple is probably my second favorite. Again, I'm as shocked as you are! They've just been so consistently awesome that I can't seem to hold anything against them. Even Jakob's purpleish pants... Which, leave it to Adam Shankman to say what everyone in the audience was thinking. :)

KATHRYN AND LEGACY
And the surprises just keep on coming... to an extent. I'm enjoying this couple a lot more than I expected to, and I can recognize just how much Legacy has improved week to week, but at the end of the day, his technique just can't stack up to the other dancers. The choreographers do a really good job putting together routines where he can showcase his b-boy skills and kind of mask his technical shortcomings, but that Viennese Waltz needed some help. Kathryn did a hell of a job carrying the routine (a routine in which it was basically designed for her to lead--way to play to their strengths there, choreographers), and Legacy managed to keep up, but when someone with as untrained an eye as I have is thinking, "Oooh, his footwork is really sloppy and his stance is weak," you know you're in trouble. The judges were pretty forgiving, after some well timed waterworks, but I really think they were pretty underwhelmed by his technique. I still very much enjoyed the performance, so I guess I have to give him a bit of a pass as well... Their other routine was excellent. Sonya's Jazz routines are always pretty weird, but they're always interesting and leave me wanting more. This was an instance in which Legacy's b-boy skills were employed in awesome ways (rather than kind of forced ways). They both totally committed to their roles and while again, I think Kathryn kind of carried things, this routine was much stronger for Legacy and he managed to not only keep up, but seamlessly blend his technique with hers. This couple kind of reminds me of Phillip and Jeanine from last season. Once Kathryn gets a partner who can really keep up with her technical skills, I think she'll blossom even more. At present, she's having to do most of the heavy lifting, just as Jeanine did, and while Legacy is getting better week to week, I think he's kind of holding her back. I'll be interested to see how Kathryn does with a different partner, but I think Legacy will go the way of the Phillip. Soon as he pulls an Argentine Tango or something and is partnered with a partner who isn't quite so accommodating as Kathryn, I think it's all over folks.

NATHAN AND MOLLEE
Speaking of Mollee, I still hate her as much as ever and kind of hate Nathan by extension. The judges said how thrilled they'll be to see this couple pair up with more mature partners, but in Mollee's case, I think that has quite the creepy-icky potential. Seriously, just imagine her having to dance some sultry Samba or a smoldering Tango with someone like, say, Ryan. Or Legacy. Or pretty much anyone other than Nathan because Nathan is the only one young enough not to come off as some creepy old guy scamming on a 12-year-old. Fortunately, I'm quite confident that the pairings and dance choices are no where near as random as the show would have you believe, so I'm guessing it won't be an issue. Unless of course the show wants to showcase just how juvenile she really is... Hmmm... Anyway, back to last night, I really, really, really hated their hip-hop routine. Wow. I tell ya what, wow. Please refer back to the title of this post for my thoughts on this routine. Again, I think it had more to do with the routine itself than how it was danced, but this was just bad, lame, cheesy, and stupid from second one. Not that Alexander Graham Bell and his assistant trying to get a dial tone doesn't just scream "street" to me, but... well... yeah... Nathan really seemed to have fun with it and was hitting hard enough that he almost made it work, but Mollee kind of sucked it up with this one. She didn't hit any of her moves hard enough and kind of stumbled around the stage. Bad. This season has been pretty awful for hip-hop (with the shocking exception of Ashleigh and Jakob) and last night was no exception (you just wait till we get to Karen and Victor...). Fortunately, their can-can number was much, much better, but I don't think anything can save this pair for me. Their can-can was entertaining, and was far better choreographed than I could possibly have expected from Tyce, but for me, it's too little too late (even with Mollee's rather impressive ariel--in heels). I'm glad they've added it as a style and Mollee and Nathan did a fine job with it, but it just didn't seem anywhere near as naughty or scandalous as the can-can is supposed to be. I'm hoping to hell Mollee goes home and that Nathan can finally have a partner that isn't Cindy Brady's squeakier doppelganger.

VICTOR AND KAREN
After last week's eliminations, I was pretty excited for this pairing to show their stuff. Having finally gotten rid of the duller-than-dirt Channing and just-kind-of-there Kevin, it was nice to see Victor and Karen finally have partners who could keep up with them. Their Tango was excellent. They were so synchronized and stayed in character so well that I was really starting to think this would be the new power couple. I hadn't really thought much about either of them prior, but that Tango made me really sit up and take notice. How great did Victor look, by the way? Anyway, they buoyed my confidence with their first number to a degree I could hardly have foreseen, but then they totally cut it back down to size with yet another dreadful hip-hop number. Seriously, last season had some wonderful hip-hop (Jeanine and Phillip, Jeanette and Brandon, Jeanette and Ade, etc), but this season has just been abysmal. It's weird, because when they showed clips of them rehearsing, I expected it to be really good. They were totally in sync and really feeling the movements in rehearsal, but when they actually performed, they were totally out of step with one another and the whole thing just felt empty and lame. Again, I have to hand it to Adam Shankman for having the guts to point out poor music choices and at least obliquely referring to choreography problems, but those were only the tip of a very poor iceberg in this case. It's really a shame they pulled such a bad routine, but I'm afraid it's what is going to send them both home, once and for all. As much as I'd like to see Mollee go home and as much as I think Legacy probably should go home, I'm confident it's going to be Karen and Victor, which I honestly won't be too broken up over.

RUSSELL AND NOELLE
This is a pairing that I like, but really wish I liked more. They're both wonderful dancers and they generally do a pretty good job week to week, but there's just something that isn't quite clicking for me. I think it's Noelle's Dallas Cowboy's cheerleader looks... As much as I try to see her disappear into a character, I just see can't. I adore Russell, but I think his technical shortcomings combined with her unlikability is really souring this pair for me. Their Samba was awful. You know you're in some serious trouble when even I'm thinking to myself, "They're gonna get nailed for those Samba rolls..." I'm none too versed in dancing, but I knew that was bad. Noelle's gyrations were frenetic and meaningless, and Russell just doesn't have the stance or footwork necessary to pull off that kind of ballroom dancing. The whole thing felt really forced and it really fell apart at the end. The music wound down and so did their energy. I was not impressed. I totally agree with Adam that they were just too nice with the whole thing. I didn't buy their characters at all and for a Samba, that's the kiss of death. I really hoped their second number would be better, and in a way it was, but really, I think I'd rather watch a bad Samba than a Tyce D'iorio contemporary piece (a combination of my least-favorite choreographer and my least favorite style) any day of the week. It was danced well and everything, but it was just so boring that I didn't really care about any of the technique. Oy. I miss Mia Michaels... I tend to judge routines based on how much I'd like to re-watch them, and this contemporary piece was only slightly above Karen and Victor's disastrous hip-hop number. Not good. Again, this has a lot more to do with the choreographer than the dancing. I'm not a fan of Tyce's work, plain and simple, and poor Russell and Noelle had to bear the brunt of it. Between a somnolent contemporary piece (complete with cheese-tastic swatches of paint--gag me) and a totally non-sexy Samba, I think this couple might be in trouble, even in spite of Russell's appeal.

Overall, last night had a lot better dancing than this season has really had to offer. Here's how I'd rank the routines from favorite to least favorite (roughly--some of the bad routines all kind of fall into the same level of blah):

Ellenore and Ryan--Broadway
Jakob and Ashleigh--Cha-Cha
Jakob and Ashleigh--Jazz
Karen and Victor--Tango
Kathryn and Legacy--Jazz
Ellenore and Ryan--Lindy-Hop
Nathan and Mollee--Can-Can
Kathryn and Legacy--Viennese Waltz
Russell and Noelle--Samba
Russell and Noelle--Contemporary
Nathan and Mollee--Hip-Hop
Karen and Victor--Hop-Hop

Well, this has officially turned into one hell of an epic post, but you'll just have to deal with it. A few notes that you've probably already noticed: I have no idea if dance styles are supposed to be capitalized, so it's inconsistent at best. Also, I was going to hyperlink to all the dances I reference, but that's a whole lot more effort than I'm willing to put in. I assume anyone reading this is familiar with everything already anyway. :)

Final thoughts?

Who should go home? Mollee and Legacy (I like Legacy, I really do, but technically, he just can't hold a candle to the other dancers)

Who will go home? Karen and Victor

Well I'll be damned, she can read!

Just when you thought there was no possible that I had any interests other than TV, here I present my interest in TV's slightly higher-brow cousin: novels. I say slightly higher-brow because I've never really understood why reading, as a pastime, is not only completely acceptable, but downright admired, but watching TV is laughable at best and pathetic at least. I don't doubt that there's a whole lot of time-wasting, soul-sucking crap on TV, but I contend that there's at least the same ratio among books. There's a lot of really terrible literature out there (and I use the term "literature" loosely (very, very, very loosely when it comes to a certain series of vampire novels)), but it's just harder to quantify. It's very easy to watch two minutes of a show on TV and deem it awful, but it's harder to throw a novel under the bus until you've read the whole thing. I think it generally boils down to the fact that TV has a broader base and is absorbed more quickly (more people have seen the same shows than have read the same books).

Anyway, I think the primary reason reading is held in higher regard is that people aren't willing to investigate further. You can say that you're an avid reader and people will generally take it at face value. If they happen to probe far enough to get a reading list, odds are whatever you're reading isn't what your interrogator is reading (with a few, very popular exceptions) and they just leave it at that. With TV, you mention a show that you watch and even if the person has never seen a whole episode, odds are he or she has seen or heard enough about it to make a quick judgment. Books? Not so much... What are these "books" you speak of? That's why people just pretend they've heard of whatever you're reading and leave it at that.

Anyway, this all came up recently when I was lent a book that turned out to be a slutty romance novel starring vampires. It's a long story, but for those of you who work with me, you know all too well that A Quick Bite (note how I've conveniently included a hyperlink to Amazon) was well worth the time it took to read the first 10 or so pages. Wow... So bad, so cringe-worthy, so smutty, so amateurishly written, so unintentionally hilarious... It was confiscated before I could read any further, but just the first few pages alone had me rolling in the aisles... Anyway, the person who had lent the book initially (this was a friend of a friend recommendation--the person I got it from didn't actually want to read it, so Ann suggested that I read it and report back) apparently has read scads of these novels and thinks of himself as "well read." Yikes people, quality matters. You may read 500 books a year, but that doesn't make you "well read." (I tend to think of myself as "well watched".) But sadly, when this person is asked about his pastimes, he can simply say, "I'm an avid reader," and gets a nod of admiration. It's not fair, I tells ya. Not fair at all!

Diatribe over, moving on. As an English major, I spent the better part of my higher education (and K-12 education, for that matter) being required to read things. Nothing makes a book less fun to read than a deadline and an essay test at the end. Plus, my rebellious "I kinda sorta hate authority" sensibilities didn't help with my work ethic. By and large these requirements were classics, and while I could appreciate why they were classics most of the time, it didn't make them any quicker or easier to read (especially when you have to parse each and every line for subtext and crap). I've read a hell of a lot of classics and enjoyed the majority of them. This indoctrination, however, led to my exclusion of regular books. Even my extra-curricular reading somehow turned into an overview of the great works of literature. Again, enjoyable in its own right, but not exactly the carefree, quick read that one can wrap up in a weekend.

This ridiculously long, meandering preamble leads me to the point of this post [Whoa, whoa, there's a point?! I'm a little shocked myself.] I have recently decided to throw caution to the wind (read: classics to the bottom of the stack) and read some novels that came out within the last century and that don't require an Old English to English dictionary. It has kind of reminded me how fun and effortless reading can be after a long, protracted affair with the English department. It has been a welcomed change of pace and I've stumbled on to a few winners.

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO
(by Stieg Larsson)

I mentioned this book recently in a post about Spooks and lamented the fact that the title had been changed for the English version. As you may have read, the real translation of the book's original Swedish title roughly equals "Men Who Hate Women". Having read the book, I can unequivocally say that that is not only a much more appropriate title, but more provocative and interesting as well. With its American title, I would never have even picked up the book had it not been recommended by Felicia Day. Fortunately, I gave it a shot and it turned out to be one hell of a read. I can see where the real title would have been a bit off-putting, but believe me when I say that the author was most certainly not a man who hated women and if anything, the book is an unflinching, scathing indictment of men who do. It's also bitingly critical of bigots, racists, anti-Semites, sexists, sexual predators, abusers of power, and just about anyone else who deserves a good lashing.

From that description, you'd probably think this book is incredibly heavy and serious and would be a terrible slog to get through, but the serious subject matter is handled in a very straight-forward, unsentimental way that is woven into a gripping narrative. Larrson doesn't belabor his points, but rather just presents the events as they happen and the reader draws his or her own conclusions. It's extremely effective without being overbearing.

The central storyline revolves around the disappearance of a 16-year-old Harriet Vanger, some 40 years prior. (I'll try to keep this spoiler free, but for a sprawling murder mystery like this, that's not going to be easy. You've been warned.) One of the girl's elderly relatives, Henrik Vanger (I believe he's her grandfather's brother--you figure out how "second" or "third" or "removed" that makes him) employs an unlikely person to figure out what happened to the girl. Through an intricate series of events, Mikael Blomkvist, a disgraced financial journalist begins the daunting task of unraveling a mystery that is steeped in family intrigue, betrayal, suspicion, and hatred, using little more than a dead-end police report, some old photographs, and the family secrets imparted along the way. In his pursuit of the truth, he ends up employing an even unlikelier cohort in an attempt to crack a decades old cold case. Lisbeth Salander, a socially-inept, uncompromising, badass hacker is enlisted and uses her skills in conjunction with Mickael's to get to the bottom of the mystery. It's impossible to go too far beyond that without giving away some fairly spoilery details.

Although the book is nearly 600 pages long, I could hardly put it down and finished it off in only a couple of weeks. The first 30 or 40 pages were a bit rough to get through, so don't be deterred. The first chapter revolves around Swedish financial journalism and a case of libel... which, shockingly enough, didn't exactly have me chomping at the bit for more... Once you get past that, however, the novel jumps right into the mystery storyline. I was pretty surprised at what a thrilling page-turner it ended up being and was delighted and engrossed till the very end. Seriously, it's one of those novels where you get to a certain point and you just have to finish it. That point came for me at about 200 pages from the end--all of which I read the same day.

Larrson does a wonderful job building characters that you truly care about. They mystery is the basis for the book, but it's also a captivating character piece. Mikael and Lisbeth come across as very real, very complex people that you feel like you truly know. Even the massive Vanger family is home to several fully-formed, individual, specific characters, each of whom serves a purpose. In spite of the sheer number of characters in the family, it's pretty easy to keep everyone straight (although admittedly, the family tree which was so handily provided was very helpful from time to time). The novel had me guessing from beginning to end and I really felt like I was along for the ride as Blomkvist and the captivatingly odd Lisbeth Salander try to crack the case. I'm a sucker for mysteries to begin with, and this one was a doozie. The pacing is excellent and even the most seemingly benign of scenes is written in such a way that you can't help but sit up and pay attention.

Although the book was completely enthralling basically from cover to cover, there were parts that were difficult to read simply based on the nature of the scenes. Some truly, truly horrible things happen and I cared enough about all the characters that I was horrified and anxious and nervous the whole time--henceforth with reading 200 pages in a sitting. If the book were made into a TV show, it would have the standard "some of this material may be disturbing--viewer discretion is advised" disclaimer. I wouldn't want anyone to shy away from the book for this reason, and I don't think it's really necessary, but you should know what you're getting into.

I'm not as well versed in reviewing books in the same capacity that I would TV, so you'll just have to bear with me on this. I'd definitely recommend The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and I definitely plan to read the two follow-up novels. (The author actually died a few years ago with three unpublished manuscripts to his name. The first two have been published and I hear the third is on its way.) With a final note regarding the English title of the book, there is a girl with a dragon tattoo, but the tattoo itself isn't all that central to anything at all. The English major inside me has a complex theory about why it was re-titled that, and it's a pretty satisfying theory I must say, but it's only referenced obliquely in the book and I really need someone to bounce my ideas off of. So, if you end up reading this (or already have), we might need to discuss the significance of the tattoo. :)

And if that wasn't enough of an incentive, there's a fair amount of Swedish references as well, so really, who could resist? (Seriously though, the place names meant absolutely nothing to me, but fortunately most of the human names were pretty normal.)

I was actually going to discuss several of the books I've read recently in this post (including the superb Water for Elephants and the fun, English-y, quirky The Eyre Affair), but I think this sucker is sufficiently long as it is. Without any new TV premieres to look forward to and various shows headed for winter break, I think I'll save those for a rainy day.

I bring you love... (It's bringing love! Break its legs!)

"Saw a great documentary on ABC last night on the lizard people who live among us. The head lizard girl looks like someone
I used to know."

--Nathan Fillion on Twitter.

So awesome. Love him.

ABC's much anticipated V premiere finally came on Tuesday, several weeks after the usual deluge of new programming. It's always a bit of a risk to premiere shows later in the game, but for a show like this, I think it was a very good idea. The risk that is run is that audiences plan on all the new shows to premiere at roughly the same time, so those that premiere early or late sometimes get forgotten. For a show like this, however, I think it was a good idea to let all the other shows play their hand and allow for some hype to build for this one single show. And, from what I'm hearing about the premiere ratings, ABC's tactic absolutely worked. We'll have to see how it fares next week, but the premiere was huge. As in, 14 million viewers overall and a 5.2 in the demos. (I realize that probably means a whole lot of nothing to most of the people reading this blog, but trust me, a 5.2 is very big. Anything over about a 2.8 is quite good, so a 5.2 is quite impressive.) I'm sure the show will slip in the ratings next week (as is a pilot's want), but the show's success will hinge on just how much of their audience is retained.

Anyway, now that the shop talk is out of the way, we can get to the show itself.

First off, a note to ABC: Stop starting your programs early! The pilot for V started a full 2 minutes before the top of the hour, so I had to watch them online after the fact. Annoying. I don't want to think that ABC has some sort of deal with advertisers to piss of DVR users, but that's sure how it feels. A lot of network's do this occasionally, but ABC is by far the most consistent offender. Grrr...

Fortunately, V started off in fairly predictable fashion (given what we've all seen of the promotional materials), so I didn't miss anything very important. The show is a remake (of sorts) of the miniseries by the same name that was a bit of a cult classic back in the 80s. I never saw the miniseries, so I was going into V blind. Well, not totally blind. As I very soon found out, and had assumed based on what I had already seen and heard, for as fanciful a tale as it is, it was very, very familiar.

The pilot centers around the arrival of "the visitors," an alien race that has positioned very large, sun-obscuring spaceships over the major cities of the world. Sound familiar? Yep. It feels derivative, and kind of is, but so are all the others. Fortunately, the writers totally recognized this fact and lampshaded the similarities almost immediately. No sooner had the visions of Independence Day started replaying in my head than a pair of teenagers being interviewed by a news show said, "Dude, this IS Independence Day!" "Which was a rip-off of any number of alien invasion predecessors..." It was a nice touch because at that point in the pilot, it's what every one in the audience was thinking. It's also a shame that this kind of invasion plot is familiar enough that the show can't help but feel derivative, so it kind of comes off as an easy way out. As long as we call attention to it, it's not a problem... Yeah, it kind of is. It may not feel as fresh and original as one would hope, but that doesn't mean it doesn't have potential. In this same vein, I appreciated that the writers acknowledged the redundancy through the characters. It's nice when the characters in a show exist in the same world we do and have the same cultural consciousness. It's always annoying when the characters in TV shows apparently don't watch any TV shows themselves. It makes for some nice meta moments which always bring a smirk to my face.

Anyway, this alien race claims to be bringing "peace, always" and proposes a collaboration between earth's inhabitants and their race. Their obvious goal is to ingratiate themselves with humans and the writers of the show did a wonderful job pinning down just how an alien race should go about winning over humanity. The "V's" tap humanity's love and devotion in the most effective possible ways--they bring medicine, are extremely attractive, and have big shiny toys. I knew the general conceit and the ins and outs of the show prior to the pilot, so there were very few surprises, but for people who didn't know anything, certain aspects were handled very well regarding the V's invasion. The V's claim that they are just now making contact with humanity, but they already seem to know everything about us. I wondered how common parlance like, "You're not so bad yourself," would have found its way into an alien culture, but as the audience finds out later, the V's have been living among us in secret for ages. They know exactly how to make themselves attractive and non-threatening to humanity because they know everything about humanity already. Little things like having a gorgeous woman be their spokesperson and telling the youths that they need a parent's signature to join up makes them seem just like us, only better. Morena Baccarin (aka Inara from Firefly) plays Anna, the leader of the V's. Her cool demeanor is a bit off-putting, but she's somehow very inviting and disarming. It's very clear that this race has put a lot of thought into this invasion, which makes it all the more apparent that they don't have the good intentions they claim to have.

At the same time, however, their surface facade is pretty hard to argue with. There are some detractors among the human race, but by and large, people are thrilled with the V's presence and see them as saviors more than threats. (As was the V's intent.) I was much less impressed with the human contingent in the pilot than the aliens, I have to admit. The way the pilot was structured, it was obvious who the main players would be, but they were set up in such a way that I didn't really care about them until everything came together at the end. Elizabeth Mitchell (Juliet from Lost) and Alan Tudyk (Wash from Firefly/Alpha from Dollhouse) form the most interesting contingent, but even their set-up could have been better. They play FBI agents who spend the better part of the pilot investigating a terrorist cell. Even though the show did a good job explaining why they would be carrying on with their jobs as usual, I couldn't help but to think, "Um, there's a giant spaceship hovering over your city..." It just felt weird to see people going on with life in a normal way with an alien invasion underway... I was very glad to see that the terrorist cell was actually a secret group of aliens, but that isn't revealed until the bitter end and for the better part of the pilot, the audience has to wonder if what they're watching will actually matter later on.

In that same vein, the character of Ryan and his girlfriend don't appear to matter for a good long while. I assumed that all these people actually would matter when all was said and done, but the pacing of the pilot and the build-up for the reveals at the end wasn't as compelling as I would have hoped. Ryan's relationship with his girlfriend didn't have any weight to it till he was revealed as an alien. The secretive text messages and phone calls were intriguing, but again, the set up left me wondering if any of it would really matter in the end. It did, of course, but I think the writers could have done a much better job drawing me in to their storylines much earlier on. As it was, the only characters I really cared about were the aliens and Wash... who turned out to be an alien...

Which reminds me, as I watched the pilot, the most interesting and engaging human relationship was between Mitchell's character (Erika, was it? we'll call her Juliet) and Wash. Being the Whedon fan that I am, I adore Wash and I was really hoping he'd have a good-guy role after his turn as Alpha on Dollhouse. Don't get me wrong, he makes for a great bad guy, but when he was revealed as the leak from the FBI and one of the murderous aliens, I was a bit bummed. The reveal was actually quite well done, but still kind of a downer, mainly because I liked his and Juliet's chemistry on the show. With his reveal, it puts them at odds. It wouldn't have mattered so much, but that the other relationships on the show have yet to grab me. Juliet's relationship with her son was of little concern to me and the set up for it wasn't compelling enough for his betrayal to carry much weight. Newscaster guy (Scott Wolf) was fine and served a necessary purpose, but again, didn't draw me as thoroughly as I would have expected.

All in all, I think the main problem with the character set up was the fact that the pilot was only an hour long. Had the pilot been two hours, the writers would have had plenty of time to set everything up in a more complex and substantive way which would have made the reveals at the end much more powerful. For me, too much ground was covered, too many characters were introduced, and too many pivotal reveals were made in too little time. I'm not saying it should have been a slow, belabored, protracted process, but I think more development over a longer period of time would have given all the characters more appeal and the overall storyline more emotional depth. The pacing was a definite issue and given the time constraints, the writers actually did a pretty decent job. They tried their damnedest to throw little quiet moments into the pilot and add some subtlety wherever they could, but in only 43 minutes, that doesn't add up to a whole hell of a lot.

The cursory overview of the characters was a problem in other areas as well. In other human news, and as is so often the case for me, the religious aspect was off-putting. I can see where it was absolutely necessary (what with religious types probably having a lot to say about something like an alien invasion), but the way it was handled left me unimpressed. It either needed to be explored in much more depth or ignored altogether. As is, it felt like the writers knew they had to include religion (which mostly rests on the shoulders of a priest), but didn't have the time to really do so, so they just put in as much as they could and called it a day. It didn't feel deliberate or all that thought-out and as a result, kind of fell flat. His words weren't as powerful as they should have been and the questions of faith didn't resonate like I would have expected.

The pilot really picks up steam when the underground resistance is exposed. A clandestine group of humans who discovered that aliens were among us ages ago come together at the end of the pilot to discuss the hostile takeover that is to come. The rebels set up the most compelling dynamic for the show. Along with the humans, certain V's (that guy named Ryan--he does matter!) are among the resistance. There's some delightful bloodshed and violence and the pacing finally picks up in a way that made me really pay attention. The peaceful serenity (oh how I miss Firefly) of the V's public persona was interesting and provocative and all, but it wasn't till they started kicking some ass and showing their teeth that I was really enthralled. After seeing the scaly lizard people wreak havoc on the unsuspecting resistance meeting, it made Inara's (sorry, Anna's) icy exterior all the more deliciously menacing. Morena Baccarin does a wonderful job letting the scary, monstrous, evilness shine through the peaceful facade ever so slightly. She was far and away the best player in the pilot and although it was kind of a bummer to see Wash turn out to be a baddie, the thought that he and Inara are on the same team is pretty damn satisfying.

Overall, the pilot was good, but not spectacular, and I have to admit, I expected spectacular. For a show with this kind of high gloss, high cost, high concept approach, I was hoping for more. It was successful, and the end really came together in an interesting and exciting way, but the build up just didn't quite do it for me. The real problem I see is, where does the show go from here? The way the pilot set things up, there's pretty much no other plotline that can be had other than supporters versus resistance, aliens versus humans. It's a stirring dynamic that has a lot of room to explore, but in the end, it kind of feels like it should have been a miniseries... oh wait, it... was. Awkward. The show has set things up so that pretty much every episode has to be about the resistance and I'm just not sure how long that can or should be sustained. I'm hoping the writers can work things out in such a way that the central conflicts don't get old, but I'm just not sure they could keep that going for several years. In that vein, I was very glad to hear that ABC plans to roll out the show much more like a miniseries than an actual series. We'll get 4 or 5 episodes at a time and then a break. I think it's a good plan creatively for the show, but I do wonder what kind of impact that will having on viewership.

In summation (finally, right?), the pilot was good, but I think it could have been (and should have been) a lot better. I really wasn't blown away and I'm not exactly chomping at the bit for next week. I think the show has a lot of potential, but unless the writers find a way to improve the pacing and make the central conflicts more diverse, I think they might be spinning their wheels for a while. I went in with very high expectations and I'm afraid that may have colored my judgment overall. It wasn't a bad pilot by any stretch, but I wasn't as blown away as I had hoped and expected.

Here's hoping the weeks to come live up to (and hopefully exceed) my expectations. I definitely think it can, but I'm still on the fence as to whether it will.

Pilot grade: B-

Dance Dance Meh-volution

My first foray into So You Think You Can Dance was over the summer. Not knowing a damn thing about dance, I had never really been all that inspired to give the show a chance. My hatred for American Idol left me with the sour assumption that SYTYCD would be the same show, only with dancing... Thankfully, I couldn't have been more wrong. :)

I was a little hesitant at first given my total lack of dance knowledge, but I figured, I enjoy Top Chef without knowing anything about cooking, so hopefully the same principles will carry over. So if you've never given either show a chance based on a paucity of expertise, fear not, you'll still enjoy the show and quite frankly, learn a whole lot. I have found that going to restaurants (real restaurants) is a lot easier because I'm familiar with a lot of the terms, actually know what they mean most of the time, and most importantly, know how to pronounce everything so you don't sound like a moron while ordering.

Anyway, back on topic. I watched season 5 of SYTYCD over the summer and absolutely loved it. I didn't have any prior knowledge of the show, so I couldn't really compare and contrast. This season, I have the luxury of experience to rely on when critiquing the newest crop of dancers. So far? I'm a little underwhelmed... I have heard from SYTYCD aficionados that last season wasn't all the great, but I didn't know any better, so I loved it. I'm not sure if it's first time nostalgia that is giving my perceptions of last season a warm soothing glow or if it was genuinely better, but that's how I'm feeling so far.

We'll get to the actual dancing in a minute, but first I must give credit where credit is due. The best part of season 6 so far? Adam Shankman! Holy hell he should have been made a permanent judge ages ago. He was always my favorite guest judge, for oh-so-many-reasons. I've hated Mary with a white hot passion since even before I started watching the show (indeed, she was one of the contributing factors in my refusal to watch for so long) and Nigel is kind of a dour wet blanket (whose jokes are generally pretty labored), but decent enough, I suppose (at least he sticks to his guns), but up till this season, the show has rotated the third judge spot (among the choreographers and assorted other guests) so you were never too sure who you'd be stuck with. I say "stuck with," because with rare exceptions, the guest judge kind of sucked most of the time. Let me count the ways:

• Lil' C: It would be one thing for him to try to sound smart if there were even a kernel of actual knowledge behind his comments, but it became very clear very quickly that he doesn't have a clue in hell what he's talking about. He just talks in ridiculous circles that he thinks sound profound until he spirals out of control. I'm sure he thinks he's some sort of genius and that he has the audience fooled into agreeing with him, but that's just not the case. The only style he ever really has anything substantive to say about or on which he can offer an informed opinion is hip-hop (and even then he usually just spins his wheels till he runs out of words from his word-a-day calendar (which he generally uses incorrectly)). I knew he was out of his depth in other styles when he ripped Phillip apart last season for his tango with Jeanine, not because it was bad (and it was--mostly due to Phillip), but because his knees were bent the entire time. Thankfully, Mary (for whom ballroom is the only style on which she has an informed opinion) totally called him out and she and Nigel went so far as to ask the choreographer what was correct. Turns out? Phillip's knees, which were bent the entire time, were supposed to bent. The entire time. Oh, Lil' C. Of all the problems with that routine, you picked out the one that wasn't actually real. Nice job. He was hilariously cowed by this whole event though, and that was quite satisfying to watch. :)
  
  
• Tyce D'iorio: I'm not even sure how to really define why he's a mediocre guest judge. His chinstrap of a beard is almost too distracting to pay attention to what he says. His comments, like his choreography, are generally constructed in a fairly decent way, but doesn't leave you wanting more. I guess he just doesn't really make much of an impression. Although, when he's trying to be fabulously bitchy, he makes an impression, but it's not a good one. He ends up with mostly just bitchy, and with no where near enough fabulous.
  
  
• Debbie Allen: I actually kind of like Debbie as a judge, but she seems to rely a lot more on down-home charm than on actual critique. She likes entirely too many of the dances and doesn't express criticism very well. To boot, when she expresses praise, it sometimes goes a little something like this, "You handled your big woman, yes you did!" Um... thanks? That was possibly very... sweet... of you... She's entertaining enough, but is a bit lacking in the critique end of things (which would be fine, but Mary's kind of out of her depth a lot of the time and that leaves all the heavy-hitting to Nigel... which isn't optimal).
  
  
• Mia Michaels: I quite enjoy Mia's choreography, but I'm always a bit underwhelmed by her criticisms. Aside from generally having the appearance of having just gotten out of bed, her critiques are kind of lazily delivered as well. She knows what she's talking about and when she gives praise, it's hard won, so it's satisfying, but she tends to set up shop in the dour, slightly listless end of the spectrum... I'm pretty bummed that she's left the show as a choreographer though... and I'm sure all the contemporary dancers this season who were swooning at the chance to work with her are pretty bitter--which I guess softens the blow. Heh. I'm not much of a fan of contemporary, in case you couldn't tell. Not that watching people throw their arms around as they show us how much emotion they can pretend to have isn't riveting, but well... yeah...
  
  
• Ellen Degeneres: ...apparently knows even less about dance than I do. She tried too hard to be funny and couldn't temper the bad jokes with actual, knowledgeable critiques. Overall, her appearance was a flop for me.
  

Which brings me back to Adam Shankman. Not only is he genuinely funny and entertaining to listen to, but he offers criticisms that are justified and might just help the dancers be better dancers next week. He has constructive things to say about every single style imaginable and does so in the most charming, energetic possible way. He clearly has a wide breadth of knowledge not only of dance technique, but of dance history and performance. Regarding Bianca and Victor's Color Purple number: While Mary and Nigel basically echoed his sentiments in vague and unoriginal ways, Adam pulled out very real references that totally supported his argument and informed on his critique. Mary generally just says something like, "It just didn't quite do it for me." Thanks, Mary. That was very informative and constructive. I'll take that stirring critique and use it to improve for next week... Adam, on the other hand, makes it very clear why is didn't quite do it and what the dancers can do to improve things in the future.

When I started this post, it was actually going to be about dance, I promise, but somehow I got derailed along the way...

Hopping back on the track, this show actually has people who dance, not just people who judge. Shocking, I know. So far, I haven't exactly been blown away by anyone really, but there have been a few surprises and there are several people on my radar... Here's how things are stacking up:

• Channing and Phillip: Perhaps my overall "meh" with this season so far started out off with their lackluster, zero-energy, poorly performed jive in episode one. Add to that the most awkward, potentially dangerous samba I've ever seen in episode two and I found myself very thankful that Phillip was sent packing. For as awful as their jive was, the judges weren't nearly as brutal as I had expected. Evan and Randi's jive last season was a million times better and they got skewered for it. Somehow Channing and Phillip got by with tepid reviews and weren't even in the bottom for it. Redemption was had last night though. Channing actually did a pretty respectable job with the samba and was willing to take her life into her hands with those lifts. Seriously, Phillip is not the guy I'd want lifting me six feet in the air, thanks... Bad. He didn't support her at all and I'm pretty sure she banged her head on the floor at the end. He won't be missed.
  
  
• Mollee and Nathan: Mollee is pretty much the embodiment of everything that's wrong with humanity, so I'm having a really hard time appreciating anything about this pairing. Nathan is fine, but he seems to be feeding off some of Mollee's perkiness and it's making them pretty nauseating. Their dancing is fine, if not spectacular. The judges seem to like them a lot more than I do, but then often have more to say about their youth and energy than their actual technique. I'd like to see Nathan stick around, but Mollee needs to be thrown out of a window. I thought their Bollywood number was stronger than their frenetic disco last week (I don't know what Dorianna is smoking, but is certainly doesn't mellow things out), but that may be because I hold all disco numbers to the standard set by Brandon and Jeanette last season.
  
  
• Pauline and Peter: After Brandon was used and abused and sent packing by the show last week, and Ariana (was it?) got the boot before she really had a chance to break out from the crowd (and who should have stayed instead of Noelle), I was very interested to see how Peter and Pauline would pair up. Apparently, they pair up quite nicely because I thought they totally rocked their crazy-ass Wade Robson routine. I love Wade Robson, what can I say? Like Adam said, you have to give 1000% to one of his routines and they absolutely did. It ain't easy portraying a blob of paint that has come back to haunt Vincent van Gogh after he excised you from The Starry Night (that's Robson for you), but they pulled it off. I like this pairing and was surprised to find just how much I'm liking Peter (who is the only remaining tapper, after last night).
  
  
• Bianca and Victor: Speaking of tappers, Bianca rather unjustifiably got the boot last night. Don't get me wrong, her performance wasn't great, but it was good. And a hell of a lot better than Noelle. My primary gripe with getting rid of Bianca, aside from her superior performance, is the fact that if America were actually voting, there's no way she would have gone home. As the judges say time and time again when someone controversial is cut, this is America's favorite dancer, not America's best dancer. Bianca would have outlasted Noelle by a long shot--on talent and on popularity. Sigh. As for Victor, he'll be dancing with Channing next week. Unlike Phillip, Victor will actually be able to do the lifts without endangering Channing's life, so that'll be nice.
  
  
• Russell and Noelle: Speaking of Noelle, she should have gone home. Again. I understand that the rules allow for a one week's reprieve when the doctor has ordered, but she didn't perform last week and kind of sucked it up this week. She should have gotten the boot. I don't think they should allow for a week off, personally, but whatever. Everyone seems to claim that she's a wonderful dancer, but I have yet to see it. Her and Russell's tennis hip-hop routine was pretty bad. Russell held his own (both with the hip-hop and the tennis), but Noelle struggled with both. Add to this the fact that she's friends with Mollee (with two e's--gag me) and I'm really starting to hate her. I adore Russell and think he deserves better.
  
  
• Legacy and Kathryn: All together now, "I did not see that coming!" I was unimpressed by anything but Legacy's b-boy skills in Vegas and was sick of Kathryn's crying after about 10 seconds, but somehow, inexplicably, they are one of the strongest couples on the show. Their caveman hip-hop routine last week was excellent, but I was a little afraid of the thought of Legacy doing contemporary this week... I needn't have worried. His performance was very strong (as was hers) and somehow they make for one hell of a team--a team that appears to genuinely like each other. I'm as shocked as you are, peeps, but they've really brought week to week. I hated them both at first, but they've really grown on me. I'm not counting my chickens, though... we'll just see how things go when they draw the quick-step... yikes...
  
  
• Kevin and Karen: The judges keep telling me they're amazing (well, mostly Karen), but I just don't seem to care... I think my favorite aspect of this couple is Adam's reaction to their routines. He cracked me up after last week's cha-cha as he noted that she was insanely hot ("And for those of you who know me, that's not usually my thing") and this week, fell out of his chair (literally) twice. It was cheesy, but totally perfect. The speed with which he hit the deck was the funniest part. Anyway, Karen is certainly more interesting (and more talented) than Kevin, but so far, they kind of bore me. It'll be interesting to see how they fare when it's up to America, not the judges.
  
  
• Ashleigh and Jakob: I'm not all that thrilled with this couple, but they've honestly performed much much better than expected. The show seems to feel the need to remind us that she's married every ten minutes, which is annoying, but not necessarily her fault (read: Dear Show, please stop reminding us!). In Vegas, I really didn't think she had the technical skill to make top 20 and was sure her inclusion was based solely on Paula dropping out, but Ashleigh has actually performed pretty well thus far. Jakob is obviously a better dancer, but she's been able to keep up (more or less). Jakob's technique is impressive, but I'm not wowed by his personality thus far. It's an odd pair, but somehow seems to be working. I'm a little sadistically excited for them to draw hip-hop though... I don't think either of them is suited for that. At all.
  
  
• Ryan and Ellenore: Ryan (who's married to Ashleigh, in case you forgot) has always been more talented than his wife, but I was pleasantly surprised at how he has parlayed his Latin ballroom skills into other styles. And Ellenore, who is way taller than I remember, is a beautiful dancer all around (kooky, but very talented). Their modern, contemporary, jazz-y, uh... Sonya Tayeh routine last week was bizarre, but very well done. I was interested to see how Ellenore would handle ballroom, and as it turns out, she's a pro. Ballroom and hip-hop are the areas where contemporary dancers generally struggle, and if she's this awesome at ballroom, odds are she can handle hip-hop as well. Extra points? Her dress was caught on her heel for about 40% of the routine (according to Kat) and she never faltered. Im-press-eeve.
  

Anyway, this post has somehow turned into the mother of all posts, so I'm going to wrap things up. I generally have a lot of opinions about this particular show ("...as opposed to your other shows?"), so I'm going to be posting about it more and more, methinks. I'll be glad when it finally goes back to audience voting though. It should make things a lot more interesting and will hopefully liven up this season for me. If Bianca had made it on to any of the previous seasons for which she auditioned, I have no doubt she'd have made it to the top ten.

Sigh.