The One and Only

Annie, that saucy minx, has tagged me... Here I am, the one and only...

I am... taller than a mountain. Deeper than a sea. Oh wait, there's a chance that's Rivers and not me. Let's see, I am... snarky and cynical. On my fifth grade semester evaluation whateverness, under "Room for Improvement," my teacher wrote, "Be less cynical." Which, given that my cynicism goes back that far, I have to assume it's congenital and there's nothing I can do about it.
I know... I'll never be the dynamic, accomplished, fulfilled, successful person that I'd like to be.
I want... the planet to stop melting.
I once... was offered (read: threatened with) the prospect of hooking up with some random Russian guy that Milana tracked down online (To Catch a Predator: The Moscow Edition, where Chris Hansen offers the guy vodka instead of lemonade).
I wish... I were talented.
I hate... George W. Bush. What a slimeball. He won't be missed. Here's hoping Cheney takes him hunting next time... I also hate my name. Trixie, Bambi, Candy and I will be performing later tonight (bring a stack of ones with you), or so it would seem.
I miss... the total lack of responsibility that comes with childhood, and which isn't appreciated till it's long gone.
I hear...the second season of Pushing Daisies is going to be off-the-hook fantastic!
I crave... stories (preferrably full of scandal and intrigue).
I search... dictionary.com for definitions at least a few times a week.
I wonder... if I'll ever have the kind of life I've always wanted.
I regret... not going away to college somewhere (anywhere) far away from Utah.
I care... about very little that's actually important.
I always... look forward to lunch on Saturday.
I am not... over my quarter-life crisis yet...
I believe... people are lying to me when they say I'm attactive (seriously, peeps, I appreciate the sentiment, but the opposing evidence is just so overwhelming).
I dance... around issues I don't want to address directly.
I sing... along to musicals, truly the purest form of expression in existence.
I don't always... tag people specifically (see below).
I win... the award for "Most TV Viewed in a Single Evening".
I listen... to my ipod rather than the people yammering away on the bus.
I can usually be found... suffering from ennui.
I am happy about... the fall TV season starting up soon.
I tag.... whomever (see above).
Late addition: I never.... proofread, spellcheck, or read over my blog posts, so if these are riddled with errors, so be it.